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Positions for cunnilingus

Put Some Ambition in Your Position:
Postures That Will Make Her Purr
Function over Form

Choose your positions wisely, because you're probably be asked for repeat performances. Remember that if something sounds like it might be too strenuous for you, you're probably right. The best positions are more about precision than brute strength, though there's something to be said for being daring.

Bad form is often the difference between success and failure. Porn films would have us believe that any position is the right position: up against the wall, on top of a table, hanging off the bed, hanging off the rafters—the wilder the better. But it should come as no surprise that with titles like Hannah Does Her Sisters or Titty Titty Bang Bang, the porn industry, in general, shies away from the lofty aesthetics of cinema vérité.

First and foremost, expert cunnilingus needs to be delivered from a position that enables the giver to comfortably apply persistent, rhythmic pressure over time while the receiver relaxes into the nuances of arousal.

Not surprisingly, one of the main reasons why men say they don't perform cunnilingus more often is the physical strain—in short, the pain of being in the wrong position. So if your attitude toward cunnilingus is “no pain, no gain,” the sentiment is appreciated, but entirely unnecessary. tomcat

First, the Wrong Way

There are a few positions, better suited to porn films than to prolonged clitoral stimulation, that have nonetheless become widely, and wrongly, disseminated into the mainstream. At best they serve as spicy embellishments to a session of cunnilingus; at worst they can seriously undermine the entire experience. These popular positions include 69'ing, SOMF (Sit on My Face), and Up Against the Wall, among others.


Of the three positions mentioned, 69'ing, in which man and woman service each other simultaneously, is probably the most prevalent and also the most problematic:

  • In the 69 position, you are endeavoring to provide stimulation from the wrong point of attack. Rather than approaching her vulva from the south (bottom up), you're coming in from the north (top down). Regardless of who's on top, you'll have little use of your hands and it will be difficult to use your tongue to comfortably service the major parts of her clitoris. As author and sex columnist Anka Radakovich writes of the position: “Working out the logistics of fitting mouths on orifices and protrusions while adjusting to the rhythm is like playing a game of Naked Twister.”
  • If you're giving while simultaneously receiving, it's highly unlikely that you'll be able to focus on the application of measured, evenhanded clitoral stimulation. There's even a chance that you'll get caught up in the moment and allow yourself to lose control.
  • Finally, the position cannot be comfortably sustained at length, nor can she fully relax and concentrate on the nuances of arousal. The fact is, when it comes to oral sex, it's best for one partner to focus on giving while the other focuses on receiving—both are extremely pleasurable and best kept pure.

In short, 69'ing is a great novelty act. That's not to say it isn't an exciting position, or a compelling means of enabling her to enjoy the pleasure of pleasuring you, but such joys are best experienced during foreplay—not coreplay.

When 69'ing during foreplay, make sure you don't waste your best tongue strokes: save them for coreplay. The first kiss upon her vulva should take her breath away, so don't diminish the sense of anticipation. Instead, kiss the areas around the vulva rather than the clitoris. Use your lips, not your tongue. Smooch. Nibble. But stay away from the clitoral head. Turn the position into one of strength; use it as a way of teasing her to greater heights.

SOMF (Sit on My Face)

The same can be said of SOMF, a position that provides you with better access to her vulva than 69'ing but significantly hinders the use of your hands and fingers—a trade-off without much real gain. Sitting on your face (really kneeling around your face) forces her into an upright position and places undue stress on her back and legs. In this position, it's highly unlikely she'll get very far in the process of sexual response; however, it can prove erotically stimulating by providing her with a sense of dominance, and might be good for a hit of fun.

Up Against the Wall

In Up Against the Wall she literally stands against a wall while you kneel down before her. Although it's unlikely that she'll reach orgasm from this position, with a wall to provide support it's easier to lead her through several stages of arousal. Up Against the Wall has all the rough passion of a “quickie,” but without the male ejaculation that often accompanies the genital version of this position.

All three of these positions-69'ing, SOMF, and Up Against the Wall—are useful in that they provide erotic stimulation and often heighten the drama of the moment. In fact, with a little help from your imagination, there's no limit to the number of creative positions that can be devised and put to the test—one website article I came across actually recommends going down on a woman while she stands on her head with her legs wrapped around your neck 8-O. Use these positions during foreplay to accelerate the process of arousal into coreplay, but don't mistake them for the ones that enable the application of serious clitoral stimulation to the point of no return.

So much for the wrong way . . .:-\

Now the Right Way

Her Body

  • She should start flat on her back, legs spread comfortably apart, but not too far (six to nine inches at most) and a bit bent at the knee. As a rule, her legs should always be closer together than farther apart, as she needs the full command of her pelvic muscles. She should be completely at ease and relaxed: able to focus on the pleasure she's receiving without any distraction—physical or mental.
  • Pay attention to the arch of her back. Once again, we get the idea from porn that when a woman is turned on she naturally arches her back upward, throws back her head, and points her breasts and neck up and out. This position, while titillating, is what the famous sexologist Wilhelm Reich referred to as the “hysterical arch.” Not only is it highly unnatural, but the position also cuts off blood flow to the pelvic area, hampers breathing, and inhibits the process of sexual response. When a woman is aroused and comfortable, her back will find itself flat, without an arch, and her genitals will be tilted slightly up toward your mouth, rather than driving downward—in short, the opposite of what we see in porn. To help her achieve this naturally comfortable position, prop a pillow or two behind her neck and shoulders.
  • A pillow propped under her butt will help with blood flow to the pelvic region, as well as provide you with better access to her genitalia, making it easier for you to connect “lips” and alleviate stress to your neck.

Your Body

  • It's important that you have enough space to stretch out and be comfortable—so you'll probably have to push her up toward the head of the bed. (If you're both on the floor—also a great place for a session of cunnilingus in that the floor provides a solid flat surface—just make sure there's some sort of cushioning beneath her, be it a soft rug or plush quilt.)
  • Place a pillow beneath your forearms and get your “working hands” as comfortable and close as possible to her vulva.

Position yourself vertically from her vagina. Other than the narrow flaring of her legs, your bodies, taken together, should form a straight line.

  • All in all, you should feel perfectly at ease adopting a wide range of motions: licking for long periods of time, sliding your hands underneath her butt, lifting her legs and rocking her to and fro, placing a hand on her stomach, turning her body from side to side.

Your Head

  • They don't call it “giving head” for nothing. Cunnilingus involves more than just the use of your tongue. You need to get your whole face in there guys, she is not a Popsicle. Your nose should be buried lightly in her mound, with your upper lip and mustache area resting firmly against the front edge of her pubic bone. You should be able to easily use your upper lip and gum to provide light pressure against her front commissure, the area just above the clitoral head where her outer lips meet.
  • As for your tongue, it should easily be able to rest against her vaginal entrance and cover its entire expanse from top to bottom. This position enables you to apply a full range of motion with your tongue: from long vigorous licks to deft persistent flicks, from keeping it flat and still to applying focused tongue-tip pressure.
  • All in all, you should be completely involved with her vulva; on top of it, buried in it: face, mouth, nose, gums, teeth, and tongue—all of which will be employed one way or another. If a filmmaker were capturing the event, very little would be seen beyond the still back of your head. Certainly, there would be few, if any, flashes of tongue.

Don't settle for anything less than total comfort and total access. You'll know you're both in the right position when she's able to comfortably look down the length of her body and watch you work, and you're able to look up, without breaking the flow of action, and make eye contact with her. Women love eye contact. Eye contact can be an important part of her Dominance over you. eye contact will increase her lust.
When it comes to cunnilingus and body position, remember that form follows function. Keep your mind focused on providing her with pleasure, and the body will naturally follow your lead.

Here are a few primers to get you ready for the best cunnilingus sessions.


The Most Comfortable Position

Though we'll go into more advanced positions later, one of the most comfortable may be for your woman to lie across the bed, her legs hanging to the floor. Kneel on the floor (maybe with a towel or pillow under your knees to maximize comfort) and bring her hips to where you have good access to the full vagina. In this way, you can provide her with a wide range of sensation, and your flexibility of movement will keep you comfortable and creative without the tension on your back and neck muscles that would result from attempting the same feats flat on the bed. Once you've developed your oral skills so that you are not easily thrown off by the positioning of your body, it is time to experiment with other position

Flapping Legs

This position is essentially the basic comfortable position recommended in the first part of this section, only the person giving oral sex is further up on the bed. This creates a little more strain in the back and neck muscles, but it's worth the trouble because the angling of the woman's legs will create better access to the clitoris and deeper penetration possibilities. The woman's legs are bent, with her feet resting on her lover's shoulders. Her pelvis is curved much more upward than in the first position, and one leg may even be resting down her partner's back. To create more access as needed, you can edge your shoulders upward and press her thighs back further. This is a great position for incorporating a little vibrator or anal play . As she approaches climax, she will alternately press down on your shoulders with the pads of her feet and flap them in the air. This position provides great access for upward strokes, and you can angle your arms a little under her body for support.

Captured Tortoise

For superior access (but less flapping), try Captured Tortoise. In this, the woman holds her legs to her chest, providing you with total access. This is a great position if your woman is into penetration—combining a vibrator or dildo with your oral stimulation is a godsend here. Be careful, because as she gets excited her body may twist and, because she is holding her legs to her chest, she may flip over. Stabilize her by helping her hold one leg with your arm (but not too hard).

The Pleasure Plank

Some people like the sensation of having their legs together during oral sex. This position can be a great teaser when you are initially working your way down. Holding her just above the hips with your hands and straddling her closed, extended legs, come at her clitoris from the top of her vagina. Some women have a hypersensitive clit, and this position gives them painless pleasure by buffering the vibrations from your tongue. Of course, if you've done the exercises in our previous articles, you should be able to give feathery strokes of infinite lightness, but otherwise this position can be a fun way to pick up some of the slack or to tease her as a prelude to something more.

The 6

Another slack picker-upper is the 6. This is essentially a 69 position with you on top, but your body is off to the side and she is just relaxing. Coming at her from above, this position is a relief for your head and neck muscles, and is great for a woman who loves a downward stroke. However, if you use the position we initially recommended, where you are on the floor and she is on the bed, and you have relaxed your neck, throat, and head muscles, you will never experience a need for this position except perhaps as a way to change things up.

The Yoga payoff

Lying on her back, let your partner use her feet and legs to hoist herself up your kneeling body. Her weight should be resting on her shoulders, not her neck. From this angle, you can get a great view during oral sex—and this is a particularly nice position if your woman has a fabulous pair of breasts. Have fun watching her experience all of the erotic sensations she's feeling as you go to town on her clitoris. Don't bother with oral penetration or G-spot stimulation from this position. The combination of clit-nuzzling and the breast caresses you can give are the main attraction. Make sure to give your lady plenty of support in this one.

Positions for watching porno

If your lady is turned on by visual stimuli, allow her the pleasure of multiple flicks. Some heterosexual women like all-female porn, while others like hetero and even all-male porn. Never judge a partner based on the kind of porn they like. It doesn't necessarily mean anything about their actual sexual preferences. However, you should never watch anything that makes you uncomfortable. Remember that videos are supposed to be fun and are meant to stimulate the imagination. So hold the gavel for now.

Sofa Porno

The most comfortable porno position is probably the Sofa. Have her sit on one arm of the sofa facing the screen, spreading her knees wide and edging herself forward to the edge of the cushion. Her arms on the back of the cushion will be an important source of stability in this position. You can sit on the sofa in a doggie-style position, resting on your knees and elbows. Arching your back will add to her visuals. She may grab your head or hair with one hand and press you more deeply into her. This is a natural response to this position, and if it makes you uncomfortable, feel free to simply nudge her hand away. If she strokes your head and hair however, the presence of her hand here can be quite delightful.

Armchair Porno

This position is for the hard-core porn—loving woman or Dominant. You'll want to bring a pillow along for your knees. Have her sit in a chair with her buttocks supported by enough pillows to angle her hips upward, and make sure she is close enough to the edge of the chair for you to get access to the key players. Sitting on the floor or on your knees (this depends on the height of the chair), you can use your tongue to stimulate her clit and your hands for simultaneous penetration. Because there is little physical contact between your bodies, you may want to heighten the tease of this position by kissing her all over her legs and thighs while the porno is beginning, and circling the prey a little until she's positively drooling for you.

Think out side of the box

There are too many positions to include them all especially if you throw in anal play, but these basic ingredients should give you enough elements to begin mixing it up on your own.

Remember that the only bad oral sex is boring oral sex, and as long as you stay out of the shower the likelihood of bodily injury is fairly low ;)

Article: tomcat (Edited: in conjunction with MissBonnie and MissBitch)for the beginners guide to oral sex ©

positions_for_oral_sex.txt · Last modified: 2015/01/31 03:13 (external edit)