Tag: impact play

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Exploring Impact Play: A Comprehensive Guide to Safe and Consensual Practices

Table of Contents

Understanding Impact Play

Impact play encompasses a range of activities that involve hitting or being hit with an object in a consensual, safe, and controlled environment. Engaging in impact play, individuals may employ a variety of physical actions, such as hitting, punching, and slapping. Furthermore, the implements used can vary greatly, from everyday household items like wooden spoons and belts to specialized BDSM Femdom equipment such as floggers, paddles, and canes.

At its core, impact play is inherently tied to the principles of creativity and consent. Lucy Rowett, a certified sex coach and clinical sexologist, underscores that the consensual nature of these practices is paramount. Participants must openly communicate their boundaries, limits, and safe words to ensure that the experience is mutually enjoyable and respectful. This emphasis on consent and clear communication is crucial in building trust and safety within the dynamics of the play.

While often associated with BDSM scenes, impact play has a broader applicability, extending beyond the confines of traditional dungeons. It offers a wide spectrum of sensory experiences, from the light, playful taps that can elicit laughter to the intense, thudding strikes that may elicit deeper emotional and physical responses. These varied sensations can enhance intimacy and deepen the connection between partners, providing an avenue for exploring power dynamics, trust, and vulnerability.

Impact play isn’t just about the physical sensations; it’s also deeply psychological. For some, the anticipation and the ritual surrounding the act can heighten the overall experience. The act of preparing the space, selecting tools, and gradually building intensity can create a profoundly immersive and intimate atmosphere. This psychological component adds depth to the physical sensations, creating a holistic, engaging practice that appeals to various individuals and relationship dynamics.

Ultimately, understanding impact play involves recognizing it as a multifaceted practice that can be tailored to suit the desires and comfort levels of all involved. When practiced with emphasis on safety, consent, and communication, it becomes a powerful means of exploring personal boundaries and enhancing interpersonal connections.

Engaging in impact play requires a foundation of trust, mutual respect, and open communication between partners. Consent, which is a fundamental aspect of any intimate encounter, becomes even more critical when venturing into impact play due to its physical and psychological intensity. Ensuring that all parties involved are fully aware and agreeable to the activities is paramount for a safe and enjoyable experience.

Before engaging in impact play, partners should initiate a thorough discussion covering various aspects of the activity. This includes establishing clear boundaries and having an honest conversation about each person’s comfort levels and limitations. Discussing preferred types of play, areas of the body that are off-limits, and potential triggers is essential to avoid any unintentional harm or discomfort.

One effective way to boost communication is by agreeing on safe words or signals. Safe words act as a pre-agreed cue to pause or stop the activity immediately, ensuring that all participants have control at all times. Selecting a word that is easy to remember and unmistakably clear, even in moments of high intensity, can significantly enhance the sense of security and trust.

Additionally, pre-negotiation is a vital step in promoting transparency and setting expectations. As interests and comfort levels can evolve, regular check-ins and ongoing dialogues are crucial to maintain a consensual and satisfying impact play experience. This continuous communication helps partners identify and address any concerns, making necessary adjustments to their play.

Trust plays a crucial role in facilitating these open dialogues. Building trust requires time and effort, and it is essential for both partners to feel secure in expressing their desires and boundaries. By fostering a trust-based environment, partners can explore impact play with confidence, ensuring that the experience is consensual, safe, and enjoyable for everyone involved.

Choosing the Right Location

The choice of location for impact play greatly affects the overall experience and must be carefully considered. Opting for an environment that is safe, private, and comfortable is paramount. Whether you choose a private room at home or a specialized BDSM studio, each setting has its own advantages and disadvantages that should be evaluated before engaging in impact play.

When considering a private room in your home, privacy is often the most significant advantage. A locked door can ensure you won’t be interrupted, providing the necessary mental comfort and security for both participants. It’s also easier to control the ambiance, such as adjusting lighting and temperature, which can contribute to the overall experience. However, it’s crucial to ensure that the room is free of potential hazards. Clear the area of any sharp objects, breakables, or anything that could pose a risk during intense movements.

On the other hand, specialized BDSM studios offer a professionally designed space tailored specifically for activities like impact play. These studios are typically equipped with various furniture and tools that enhance the play experience, such as padded benches, suspension points, and soundproofing. Additionally, these studios often include safety features like first aid kits and secure storage for personal items. However, the cost of renting such a space and the necessity of scheduling in advance can be potential downsides. Prior to booking, ensure the studio’s policies and amenities align with your needs.

In either setting, it’s essential to communicate openly with your partner about the desired atmosphere and any specific requirements. Safety should always come first; consider any emergency protocols you might need. Establishing a safe word and ensuring you both understand its use is vital.

Ultimately, the right location can significantly enhance your impact play sessions by offering a safe, private, and comfortable environment, allowing you to focus on the consensual and pleasurable aspects of the experience.

Identifying Impact Zones on the Body

Understanding the anatomy and physiology of the body is crucial when engaging in impact play to ensure safety and consensual enjoyment. Different areas of the body respond uniquely to impact, and recognizing these variations is key to avoiding unnecessary harm and maximizing pleasure.

For instance, the buttocks and upper thighs are generally acknowledged as safe zones for impact play. These areas contain ample muscle and fatty tissue, which act as natural cushioning against strikes. The buttocks, in particular, are frequently targeted due to their resilience and the rich network of nerve endings that can heighten the sensory experience. Similarly, the upper thighs are well-padded and can safely absorb impact when appropriate techniques are utilized.

Conversely, some regions of the body are high-risk zones and should be approached with caution or avoided altogether. The lower back, for example, houses critical organs such as the kidneys, which are highly vulnerable to injury from impact. Striking this area can cause severe internal damage and long-term health consequences. Similarly, the neck, spine, and joints should be avoided due to their structural and functional complexity. Even light impacts in these areas can result in significant harm.

Providing clear illustrations or thorough descriptions of both safe and unsafe zones can significantly aid understanding. Visual aids can help in precisely identifying the difference between a well-cushioned area suitable for impact and a sensitive zone that must be protected. Using detailed guidance on proper targeting not only enhances safety but also enriches the overall experience by ensuring that all practices are conducted within the bounds of consensual and informed engagement.

By conscientiously learning and respecting the body’s varied impact zones, participants in impact play can prioritize safety and mutual pleasure, fostering an environment of trust and informed consent.

Understanding ‘Stingy’ vs. ‘Thuddy’ Sensations

Impact play encompasses a variety of sensations that can be broadly categorized as ‘stingy’ or ‘thuddy.’ Both terms refer to the different physical experiences that can arise from this form of play, and understanding these distinctions is crucial for participants to tailor their experiences according to their preferences and limits.

‘Stingy’ sensations are characterized by a quick, sharp impact that often feels more superficial but can leave a lasting, intense sensation. Implements that produce stingy sensations include riding crops, floggers with thin tails, canes, and whips. The sensation can be likened to the snap of a rubber band against the skin, often creating a more immediate but transient feeling of pain. Stingy impacts can heighten sensitivity in targeted areas, lending themselves to practices where precision and impact intensity are key components.

In contrast, ‘thuddy’ sensations are deeper, heavier, and more resonant. They tend to affect muscle and tissue, providing a more profound and diffuse feeling of pressure and impact. Implements such as paddles, heavy floggers, and certain types of bats are known to produce thuddiness. The sensation can resemble the forceful push of a weighted object, often leaving a lasting echo of the impact. Thuddy sensations are generally perceived as more tolerable over time, making them suitable for those who seek a more enduring yet less acute form of stimulation.

Understanding the differentiation between stingy and thuddy sensations allows participants to communicate their preferences more effectively and choose the appropriate implements for their play sessions. This knowledge is vital for structuring an experience that aligns with the desired intensity and type of sensation, ensuring a safe and consensual practice. By exploring both stingy and thuddy impacts, individuals can deepen their enjoyment and enhance their understanding of the diverse spectra of sensations within impact play.

Choosing and Using Implements

When delving into the realm of impact play, selecting the appropriate implements is crucial for ensuring a pleasurable and safe experience. The variety of tools available ranges from the simplicity of one’s hands to a diverse array of specialized instruments. Understanding the distinct characteristics of these implements, including paddles, whips, floggers, and even household items, is essential for a well-rounded impact play practice.

Hands are perhaps the most intuitive and versatile tools for impact play. They allow for a high degree of control and provide tactile feedback on the force and location of impact. For those venturing into more specialized equipment, paddles are a popular choice. Available in materials such as wood, leather, and silicone, each material offers a different sensation ranging from the thuddy impacts of heavy wooden paddles to the stingier sensations provided by leather and silicone.

Whips and floggers introduce more complexity into impact play. Whips, typically made from leather or synthetic materials, allow for precise and targeted strikes. They require skill to use effectively and safely, as improper technique can cause unintended harm. Floggers, on the other hand, consist of multiple tails that distribute the force of the impact over a broader area. This makes them ideal for those who prefer a combination of stinging and thudding sensations. The number of tails, their length, and the material they are made from all contribute to the overall experience.

Everyday household items like wooden spoons, belts, or even rubber spatulas can also be repurposed for impact play. While these items may not be designed for this purpose, they can be effective when used with care. It is important to ensure that any household item used is clean, in good condition, and free of sharp edges that might cause injury.

Regardless of the implement chosen, proper technique and maintenance are key. Techniques should be practiced to avoid striking areas with dense nerve clusters, such as the spine, kidneys, and joints. Regularly checking and caring for your implements will ensure longevity and reduce the risk of injury. Paddles and whips should be cleaned according to their material specifications, and floggers should be untangled and aired out to prevent damage.

Assessing Pain Tolerance and Aftercare

Pain tolerance is a remarkably individual experience, influenced by an array of factors including physical health, emotional state, and personal thresholds. For those engaging in impact play, it is imperative to assess and communicate pain tolerance effectively. Prior to engaging in any activity, open dialogue about boundaries and limits is essential. This conversation should include a clear understanding of what implements will be used, as different tools can elicit a wide range of sensations and impacts on the body.

During impact play, regular check-ins are crucial. Establishing a safe word or signal allows participants to communicate their limits without breaking the dynamics of the play. This ensures that all activities remain enjoyable and consensual. Both the giver and receiver should pay close attention to verbal and non-verbal cues. Changes in breathing patterns, muscle tension, and vocal sounds can all indicate how the receiver is coping with the sensations.

Aftercare is an indispensable component of impact play, catering to both the physical and emotional well-being of the participants. Post-play care helps mitigate any potential negative reactions and fosters a sense of security and trust. Physically, aftercare might involve soothing the skin with lotions or creams, providing hydration, and addressing any injuries or soreness. It is equally important to consider emotional needs; gentle debriefing, affirmations, cuddling, or simply spending quiet time together can significantly aid in the post-play recovery process.

Understanding and respecting each individual’s pain tolerance and aftercare needs is fundamental to ensuring that impact play remains a safe, consensual, and pleasurable experience for all involved. This attention to detail and communication not only prevents harm but also enhances the overall bond between participants, reinforcing mutual respect and care.

Considering Marks and Aftereffects

Marks and aftereffects are inherent components of impact play that can significantly vary depending on the individual’s preferences and the types of implements and techniques used. For some individuals, the visual or sensory reminders—bruises, welts, or redness—serve as an extended form of the experience, a personal badge of their journey through impact play. Others might find that these marks are undesirable and may prefer to avoid them, aiming for playful interactions with minimal lasting impressions.

The choice of implements plays a crucial role in determining the level and type of marks left behind. For instance, broad, flat implements like paddles tend to distribute force over a larger area resulting in less bruising, albeit potentially leaving wider, less intense marks. Conversely, implements such as canes or whips concentrate impact on narrower areas, making them more likely to produce welts or deep bruises. Those new to impact play or wishing to avoid significant marks might prefer softer materials like suede or fur-lined floggers, which minimize intense pressure points while still delivering a satisfying impact.

Effective communication is paramount in navigating the realm of marks and aftereffects. Discussing boundaries, preferences, and comfort levels before any session not only sets clear expectations but also enhances trust and mutual respect. Partners should feel empowered to discuss what kinds of marks, if any, are acceptable, and establish safe words or gestures to ensure immediate cessation of any activity that becomes uncomfortable.

Caring for marks post-session is equally important and contributes to a safer and more enjoyable experience. Applying ice to bruises can help reduce swelling, while arnica gel or lotion might hasten the healing process of any marks. Hydration and rest further promote the body’s natural recovery mechanisms. Ensuring that proper aftercare is planned and executed reflects a responsible approach to impact play, honoring the physical and emotional well-being of all participants.

Resource Article : MissBonnie 2024

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Revitalize Your Spanking Sessions: Fresh Ideas to Keep the Heat On

brown wooden chopping board on white surface

Table of Contents

Introduction: Why Mix Up Your Spanking Routine?

In consensual adult relationships, spanking often emerges as an intriguing and intimate act, creating a strong physical and emotional connection between partners. However, like many activities within the realm of intimacy, the initial excitement can wane over time if the routine remains unchanged. For the dominant partner, or Domme, the act of administering consistent, repetitive spanking can lead to physical limitations such as sore hands or general fatigue, which can dampen the overall experience. This natural weariness presents a compelling reason to infuse creativity into your spanking sessions. By exploring new techniques and approaches, you ensure that both partners remain engaged and the activity retains its captivating allure.

Furthermore, the complexity of human desire necessitates variability and spontaneity. Each session holds the potential for a unique experience, making the journey exhilarating and deeply satisfying. Introducing variety not only prevents physical burnout for the Domme but also heightens anticipation and emotional intensity for the submissive partner. A monotonous routine can become predictable and lose its potency, whereas a diverse approach to spanking keeps both participants on their toes.

Approaching spanking with a mindset geared toward adventure and innovation can rejuvenate your intimate moments, fostering a sense of novelty and thrill. From incorporating different tools to experimenting with various positions, adjusting the rhythm, or integrating verbal elements

– there are myriad ways to break the monotony and spice up your spanking routine. By embracing these changes, you open the door to an enriched experience grounded in mutual pleasure and exploration.

Through this Article, we will delve into exceptional ideas designed to revitalize your spanking sessions, ensuring that the heat remains not just alive, but intensifies, enriching your intimate connection. Keep reading as we uncover creative strategies to invigorate this cherished practice, tailoring it to meet your unique desires and preferences.

The Power of Changing Implements

In any form of activity, variety can often breathe new life and excitement. The same holds true for spanking sessions. Switching up spanking implements offers both partners the chance to explore a broader spectrum of sensations, thereby making each experience more engaging and memorable. By incorporating different tools into your routines, you can elevate the excitement and keep the passion alive.

Traditional hand spanking is an excellent starting point. The hand provides an intimate, warm, and personal touch, allowing for a range of intensity that can be adjusted on the fly. However, over time, it may become too predictable, making it essential to experiment with various other implements.

Paddles, for instance, offer a different tactile sensation. They are usually made of wood, leather, or even silicone, each material contributing its unique texture and impact. The broad and flat surface of a paddle delivers a more evenly distributed sting, which can be quite intense compared to a hand.

If you seek a sharper, more stinging sensation, slappers might be the implement of choice. These tools are often constructed with multiple layers, causing a delayed and intensified impact upon contact. The snap of a slapper can send thrilling waves through the skin, providing an exhilarating contrast to other implements.

Floggers, with their many tails, offer an entirely different experience. They can range from soft and caressing to vigorously stimulating, depending on the material and force used. The multiplicity of strands ensures a more complex interplay of sensations, which can captivate and invigorate both partners.

For those who enjoy the piercing and focused sensation of more precise implements, canes are an excellent choice. Usually made of rattan, bamboo, or other flexible materials, canes deliver a concentrated, deep impact. They are perfect for those who enjoy the severity and precision of a well-aimed strike.

Lastly, consider the use of “pervertables” — everyday items repurposed for spanking. Objects like wooden spoons, belts, or even flip-flops can be transformed into exciting spanking tools. The novelty of these items can add an element of surprise and spontaneity to your sessions.

Whether you’re exploring the traditional or the unconventional, changing spanking implements regularly can keep the heat on, making each session an unforgettable adventure.

Exploring Different Materials

When it comes to revitalizing your spanking sessions, choosing different materials for your implements can significantly alter the experience, offering a diverse range of sensations. Exploring materials like leather, faux fur, suede, and wood can bring a new dimension to your play, each material providing its own unique feel.

Leather, a classic choice, is prized for its durability and versatile texture. It can deliver anything from a mild sting to a severe thud, depending on the thickness and treatment of the leather. The initial coolness of the leather, followed by the heat it absorbs from the skin, contributes to an exciting sensory experience. However, leather requires regular care and maintenance to ensure its longevity.

Faux fur, on the other hand, offers a gentler, more tactile sensation perfect for beginners or those preferring a warm-up phase. The softness of faux fur can be soothing and less intimidating, making it ideal for incorporating sensory play. Its main drawback, however, is that it might not provide the intensity some seek in their sessions.

Suede brings a middle ground, offering a soft yet coarser texture than leather. This material can be gentle or intense, depending on how it is used. While suede is less likely to cause marks or bruises, it is also less durable over time and requires proper maintenance to avoid deterioration.

Wood, known for its rigidity and weight, delivers a distinct and often more intense sensation. Wooden implements can range from lightweight paddles to heavier ones, each offering varying degrees of impact. The smooth surface of wood provides a crisp, sharp sting, but it tends to bruise easier, emphasizing the need for careful control during play.

For a more varied spanking experience, consider combining different materials. Pairing leather with faux fur can create a tantalizing contrast between the sharp sting of leather and the gentle caress of fur. Alternatively, alternating between wood and suede can keep the receiver in a state of heightened anticipation, unable to predict the next sensation. By exploring and combining these materials, you can ensure your spanking sessions remain exciting and invigorating.

Switching Up the Location

Changing the physical setting of a spanking session can drastically alter the experience, invigorating both participants and adding an element of novelty. A fresh location can enhance the ambiance and set the tone for a memorable encounter. Here are some suggestions to explore.

The kitchen table or counter is an unconventional, yet exhilarating, choice. The hardness of the surface can intensify the sensation, making each strike feel more pronounced. The kitchen setting, often associated with daily routines, can add an unexpected thrill. This element of surprise can amplify the overall experience, making it stand out as a distinct memory.

Topless on a stone bench top can be a thrill for the nipples. The cold stone and heat of a well toned rump! Exquisite!

Over the knee (OTK) is a classic position that never loses its potency. Conducting a session on a living room couch changes the dynamic by offering a softer surface, which can make the experience more comfortable while maintaining intensity. The informality of the living room setting can make the interaction feel more personal and intimate, as opposed to more staged environments.

the Lounge can be a delightful way to keep your submissive in a submissive head space for longer. After a couch spanking, the next time you sit down, remind him what was done right there!

Specialized furniture like spanking benches offers a world of possibilities. These items are designed to provide optimal access and support, allowing for extended sessions without discomfort. They often create a formal, almost ceremonial atmosphere. By incorporating such specialized furniture, participants can achieve more controlled and effective techniques, elevating the overall quality of the experience. You can even build them very easily.

Each location offers its own unique ambiance and set of sensations. Whether it’s the hard surface of a kitchen counter or the familiar comfort of a living room couch, switching up the setting keeps the experience fresh and exciting. Exploring these different environments can add a new level of excitement and anticipation, enhancing the connection between partners. So, take the opportunity to experiment with various locations to keep your spanking sessions dynamic and engaging.

Adjusting the Mood and Intent

The mood and intent behind spanking sessions significantly influence their dynamics, energy, and overall enjoyment. By thoughtfully adjusting the mood, you can explore various experiences that cater specifically to you and your partner’s desires. Three primary moods to consider are playful, aroused, and punitive, each bringing its unique flavor to the spanking session.

A playful mood sets a light-hearted and fun tone for the session. In this context, spanking serves as a form of teasing or flirtation rather than punishment. Playful spanking can evoke laughter and joy, enhancing intimacy and connection between partners. For example, a mock “naughty” behavior followed by gentle, rhythmic spanks can establish an affectionate and endearing environment, allowing both participants to relax and enjoy the frivolity of the moment.

Conversely, an aroused mood transforms spanking into a sensual and erotic experience. Here, the intent is to heighten sexual tension and pleasure. Soft caresses between firmer spanks can build anticipation, driving arousal and deepening the physical and emotional connection. The deliberate pace and intensity of each spank can play a significant role in stimulating desire, leading to a more passionate and invigorating encounter. You might consider synchronizing spanking with other intimate activities for a more immersive and gratifying session.

Lastly, a punitive mood frames spanking as a form of discipline and correction. The tone becomes more serious and authoritative, reflecting a clear dynamic of dominance and submission. This scenario can be particularly appealing to those who enjoy strict role-play or power exchange relationships. The emotions elicited here can range from remorse and repentance to resilience and trust. It’s crucial to communicate boundaries and safewords beforehand to ensure mutual consent and safety throughout the experience.

Encouraging experimentation with these different moods can help you discover what resonates most with you and your partner. Varying the mood and intent behind your spanking sessions not only keeps them fresh and exciting but also fosters deeper emotional and physical connections, enriching your overall relationship.

Incorporating Sensation Play

To rejuvenate your spanking sessions, integrating sensation play can introduce new dimensions of excitement and anticipation. Sensation play involves stimulating the various senses to heighten experiences and create a multifaceted approach to pleasure and pain. By adding elements such as temperature changes, alternating rhythms and intensities, and combining with other forms of sensory stimulation, individuals can enjoy a richer, more dynamic interaction.

One effective method of incorporating sensation play into spanking is through temperature play. This could involve using ice cubes or chilled objects to produce a stark, tingling contrast against the warmth of the skin. Conversely, warm compresses or lightly heated objects can provide soothing, relaxing sensations or enhance the impact of each spanking stroke. Temperature changes can awaken the nerves and elevate the overall sensory experience.

Another approach to sensation play is to alter the rhythm and intensity of the spanks themselves. Varying the tempo between swift, light taps and slower, more forceful strikes can keep participants on their toes, unable to predict the next movement. This unpredictability not only adds an element of surprise but can also heighten the overall sensory experience by preventing the body from becoming too accustomed to a single pattern or intensity.

Combining spanking with other forms of sensory stimulation further deepens the experience. Incorporating blindfolds to deprive sight can heighten the senses of touch and hearing, making each strike feel more intense. Introducing soft brushes, feathers, or even different textured materials can amplify the tactile sensations felt during a session. This layering of sensory inputs can transform a traditional spanking session into a nuanced, stimulating event where the confluence of sensations leads to greater pleasure.

Incorporating sensation play into spanking sessions is not only about introducing new elements but also about enhancing communication and trust between participants. It’s essential to discuss and understand boundaries and preferences, ensuring a shared, enjoyable experience. By thoughtfully adding these sensory elements, spanking sessions can be revitalized, offering a fresh and exhilarating way to keep the heat on.

Communicating and Establishing Boundaries

Paramount to any form of intimate play, particularly spanking, is the aspect of communication and establishing clear boundaries. Effective dialogue ensures that both partners feel safe, respected, and ultimately enjoy the experience. This dialogue should encompass the discussion of personal limits, utilization of safe words, and aftercare strategies. Comprehensive conversations lay the groundwork for a mutually satisfying and secure session.

Before diving into any spanking activities, it is crucial to discuss and agree upon limits. These limits will vary significantly between individuals and should be openly and honestly communicated. Understanding and respecting these boundaries helps prevent any discomfort or unintended harm. For instance, some individuals might prefer only light spanking, while others may enjoy more intense sensations. Clarifying these preferences beforehand prevents misunderstandings and enhances the overall experience.

Safe words are indispensable tools in maintaining safety during spanking sessions. The essence of a safe word is its power to halt the activity immediately, ensuring that boundaries are not exceeded. It is essential to choose a word that is not likely to be used in regular conversation, thereby averting any miscommunication. Common choices include words like “red” for stop, and “yellow” to indicate the need to slow down or reduce the intensity. Regularly checking in during the session allows both partners to gauge each other’s comfort levels, maintaining a consensual and enjoyable dynamic.

Aftercare is another pivotal component that should be discussed prior to engaging in spanking. Aftercare includes the physical and emotional support provided after the session. This can range from cuddling, applying soothing lotions, to simply engaging in a comforting conversation. Proper aftercare helps in alleviating any potential negative feelings that might arise post-session, thereby fortifying trust and connection between partners.

Initiating these conversations may seem daunting, especially for beginners. However, approaching them with openness and sensitivity can facilitate a smoother dialogue. Express your desires and concerns clearly, and encourage your partner to do the same. Regularly revisiting these conversations ensures that both partners’ needs are continually met and respected.

Ultimately, the cornerstone of a thrilling and safe spanking session is built on a foundation of thorough communication, respected boundaries, and comprehensive aftercare. Prioritizing these elements encourages a secure and pleasurable experience for both parties involved.

The Importance of Aftercare

Aftercare is an essential component of any spanking session, serving as a fundamental aspect that fosters trust, intimacy, and emotional well-being between partners. The period immediately following a spanking is a critical time for both physical and emotional care. Comprehensive aftercare ensures that both individuals feel valued and nurtured, which in turn enhances the overall experience and strengthens the bond between them.

Physical comfort is a primary element of aftercare. This can involve comforting touches, applying soothing lotions to any tender areas, and offering a calming environment. These acts of care help mitigate any discomfort and signal that both partners are attentive to each other’s physical needs. Simple actions such as holding, caressing, or even a gentle massage can significantly alleviate any soreness or stress, reinforcing a sense of safety and trust.

Emotional reassurance is equally crucial during aftercare. This can be achieved through open and honest communication, expressing gratitude for each other, and discussing feelings that arose during the session. Validating each other’s emotions and experiences can help both partners process the activities they engaged in and ensure that any concerns or anxieties are addressed promptly. Offering a listening ear and a supportive presence during this time is invaluable for maintaining emotional intimacy.

Post-session discussions are a vital part of aftercare, providing an opportunity to evaluate what worked well and what could be improved in future sessions. This dialogue enables partners to reinforce boundaries, share personal insights, and set expectations for future activities. Such conversations foster mutual understanding and continuous improvement, contributing to a positive and evolving dynamic in the relationship.

Properly conducted aftercare not only ensures the well-being of both partners but also deepens the connection between them. It underscores the importance of care and consideration in maintaining a healthy and consensual spanking relationship. By making aftercare an integral part of their sessions, couples can ensure that their experiences are not only enjoyable but also enriching and supportive.

Related Articles:

Sensual Spanking -One of the factors that sets spanking apart from other forms of swatting is the deliberate and sometimes ceremonial positioning of the participants.

Navigating Your Partner’s Request: How to Start Spanking Safely and Responsibly
Different strokes – Different strokes, for different folks
A tale to tell – Flogger designs and materials
Whip Breaking – Whip care & breaking in a new whip.
Spanking – Spanking know how.
Whipping guide – A general guide to whip play.
Bull whip safety – A general guide.
Melanoma & SM play – know the dangers.
Canes – How to use a cane the right way
Florentine flogging – Florentine flogging is a two-handed style of flagellation.
Synchronized flogging – (Video tutorial) instruction to Synchronized flogging


Need more advice or videos? Many more ideas, hints, tips and discussions are located in Free Video and PDF download section within the Free Femdom Community

Resource Article MissBonnie 2024

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Pain-Free Ways to Play with Femdom Masochist Male Submissive: Beyond Impact Play

Table of Contents

Introduction to Pain-Free Femdom Play

In the diverse and intricate world of BDSM, impact play often takes center stage for many couples exploring dominant and submissive dynamics. However, it is essential to recognize that there are myriad ways to engage in femdom masochist play that do not necessarily involve physical pain. Pain-free BDSM activities offer a unique and equally fulfilling avenue for those interested in exploring dominance and submission (D/s) without the use of impact implements such as paddles, whips, or floggers.

One fundamental aspect of any BDSM relationship, including pain-free femdom play, is the unwavering emphasis on safety and consent. Safety protocols are paramount in ensuring that all parties involved are protected from physical and emotional harm. Establishing clear boundaries and using safe words or signals can significantly enhance the experience by fostering a sense of trust and mutual respect. Consent, on the other hand, is the cornerstone of any BDSM interaction. Both parties must willingly and enthusiastically agree to the activities being undertaken, ensuring that the experience remains consensual and enjoyable for all involved.

Pain-free femdom play can encompass a wide range of activities, from psychological domination to sensory play, role-playing, and beyond. These activities allow both the dominant and submissive partners to explore their desires and fantasies in a safe, controlled environment. For instance, psychological domination can involve verbal commands, humiliation, or control over daily activities, while sensory play might include the use of feathers, ice, or other non-painful stimuli to heighten sensations.

By exploring these pain-free options, couples can deepen their connection and understanding of each other’s boundaries and preferences. This approach not only broadens the scope of femdom masochist play but also reinforces the vital principles of safety and consent that underpin all BDSM activities.

So what can you try?

Hot Sauce Play and Safety

Hot sauce play offers a unique and thrilling dimension to BDSM dynamics, particularly for those interested in exploring the boundaries of pain and pleasure without resorting to physical impact. The essence of hot sauce play lies in the application of spicy substances to the skin, which induces a burning sensation that can range from mildly irritating to intensely painful, depending on the type and concentration of the hot sauce used.

To engage in hot sauce play safely, it is crucial to select an appropriate hot sauce. Typically, sauces with a lower Scoville rating are recommended for beginners. Before applying any hot sauce, conduct a patch test on a small area of skin to ensure there is no adverse reaction. The most common areas for application include the inner thigh, back, and buttocks, as these regions are generally less sensitive than others. However, caution must be exercised to avoid applying hot sauce to mucous membranes, open wounds, or highly sensitive areas such as the eyes, genitals, and face.

When applying hot sauce, it is advisable to use a cotton ball or swab to control the amount and spread of the substance. Start with a small quantity and gradually increase as tolerated. Communication between partners is paramount; establish a safe word or gesture that allows the submissive to signal if the sensation becomes unbearable. Keep in mind that the intensity of the burning sensation can escalate over time, so continuous monitoring is essential.

In the event that the sensation becomes too intense, neutralizing the hot sauce can be achieved by washing the area with cool water and a mild soap. Dairy products, such as milk or yogurt, can also help to soothe the burn due to their fat content, which breaks down the capsaicin responsible for the heat. Always have these neutralizing agents readily available during play. Furthermore, aftercare is an integral part of hot sauce play; it involves ensuring the submissive is comfortable, hydrated, and reassured post-experience.

By adhering to these safety guidelines, hot sauce play can be an exhilarating yet safe way to explore the dynamics of power and pain in a BDSM context, enriching the experience for both dominant and submissive participants.

Figging and Safety

Figging, the practice of inserting a peeled piece of ginger root into the anus, is a method utilized within the realm of BDSM to induce a unique form of discomfort. Unlike more intense practices such as impact play, figging offers a milder yet still effective way to explore sensations. This technique is particularly valued for its ability to provide a controlled level of discomfort, enhancing the dynamic between a Femdom and her masochist male submissive.

To begin, it is crucial to select a fresh ginger root. Freshness ensures that the ginger retains its potency and optimal texture. The root should be peeled carefully, removing all the skin to expose the flesh underneath. Shaping the ginger into a smooth, tapered form with no sharp edges will facilitate comfortable insertion and minimize the risk of injury. A length of approximately two to three inches is typically sufficient, with a diameter that feels manageable for the submissive.

Prior to insertion, both parties should engage in thorough communication regarding boundaries and comfort levels. Establishing a safe word or signal is essential. Lubrication is optional; however, it can ease insertion and reduce initial discomfort. The dominant should gently insert the ginger, monitoring the submissive’s reactions closely. The ginger’s natural compounds create a warm, tingling sensation that intensifies gradually, offering a unique form of stimulus.

Safety is paramount when engaging in figging. Regularly check for any signs of excessive irritation or allergic reaction. The ginger should remain in place for no longer than 15 to 20 minutes to prevent skin damage. After removal, rinsing the area with cool water can alleviate any residual discomfort. Both parties should debrief to discuss the experience, ensuring that the submissive’s well-being is prioritized at all times.

Figging, when practiced with care and open communication, can be a rewarding addition to the repertoire of pain-free ways to play. By adhering to proper preparation and safety measures, it is possible to explore this method in a manner that enhances trust and mutual satisfaction within the dynamic.

Clothes Pins and Safety

clipped penis

Clothes pins, often overlooked as a tool in the realm of femdom and male submissive play, can be remarkably effective in creating a range of sensations on the skin. The versatility of clothes pins makes them a valuable addition to any arsenal of pain-free play. When used correctly, they can provide a heightened sense of awareness and intimacy between partners.

There are several types of clothes pins to consider. Wooden pins are the most traditional and provide a firm grip with a moderate level of pressure. Plastic pins, on the other hand, are often lighter and can be easier to handle, making them ideal for extended sessions. Additionally, there are specialty pins designed specifically for BDSM play, which can vary in pressure and grip strength.

Applying clothes pins safely is crucial to ensure an enjoyable experience without causing unnecessary pain or bruising. Start by selecting a small area of the skin, such as the nipples or the inner thighs. Gently attach the clothes pins, ensuring they are not too tight. It is essential to communicate with your partner throughout the process to gauge their comfort level and adjust accordingly. Remember, the goal is to create pleasurable sensations, not to cause harm.

When it comes to removing the clothes pins, it is equally important to do so with care. Slowly release the pressure of the pin before detaching it from the skin to avoid any sudden discomfort. For those new to this type of play, it may be helpful to apply a warm compress to the area afterward to soothe the skin and prevent bruising.

By understanding the different types of clothes pins and following these safety tips, couples can explore new dimensions of sensation and connection. This approach ensures a pain-free, enjoyable experience that enhances the dynamic between a femdom and her masochist male submissive partner.

you might also like to read more on clamps in play

Wartenberg Wheels and Safety

Wartenberg wheels are unique tools designed to create a variety of tingling sensations on the skin, making them an excellent addition to the repertoire of those exploring femdom and masochist dynamics beyond impact play. Using these wheels correctly can enhance the sensory experience without causing harm. It’s crucial to choose the right Wartenberg wheel for the intended purpose, as they come in different sizes and with varying sharpness of the spikes.

When selecting a Wartenberg wheel, consider the sensitivity of your partner’s skin and the level of sensation they are comfortable with. For beginners, a wheel with fewer and blunter spikes is advisable to avoid accidental injury. As familiarity and comfort increase, wheels with sharper spikes can be introduced to intensify the experience.

Optimal areas for using Wartenberg wheels include the back, arms, legs, and other fleshy parts of the body. These areas provide a good balance between sensitivity and safety. The face, neck, and other highly sensitive or thin-skinned areas should generally be avoided, especially for those new to this practice, to prevent accidental injury. Always communicate with your partner and observe their reactions closely to ensure their comfort and safety.

Safety measures are paramount when incorporating Wartenberg wheels into your play. First, ensure that the wheel is clean and sanitized before and after each use to prevent infections. Avoid pressing too hard; the goal is to create a tingling sensation rather than breaking the skin. If any redness or discomfort occurs, stop immediately and assess the situation. It is also beneficial to keep a first aid kit nearby in case of any minor injuries.

In summary, Wartenberg wheels can be a delightful way to explore new sensations in a pain-free manner, provided they are used with caution and care. Selecting the appropriate wheel, targeting safe areas of the body, and adhering to safety protocols will ensure a pleasurable and safe experience for both partners.

Electroplay and Safety

Electroplay is a fascinating aspect of BDSM that involves using electrical currents to stimulate the body, offering unique sensations that can range from mild tingles to intense jolts. This form of play requires a deep understanding of the devices used and an unwavering commitment to safety to ensure a pleasurable experience for both the dominant and the submissive.

Various devices are available for electroplay, each designed to provide different levels of stimulation. Common tools include TENS units, violet wands, and E-stim devices. TENS units, often used in physical therapy, deliver mild electrical pulses through adhesive pads placed on the skin. Violet wands, on the other hand, use glass electrodes to create an electrifying sensation across the skin’s surface. E-stim devices are more advanced, allowing for customizable intensity and patterns of electrical currents.

When engaging in electroplay, it is paramount to understand the electrical limits of the human body to avoid serious injury. The skin’s resistance and the current’s intensity play significant roles in determining the sensation and safety of the experience. Beginners should start with low-intensity settings and gradually increase the power as they become more comfortable. Always avoid using electrical devices near the heart, head, or any broken skin to prevent severe complications.

Communication between partners is crucial during electroplay. Establishing a safe word or signal ensures that the submissive can communicate discomfort or the need to stop at any time. Additionally, the dominant should regularly check in with the submissive to ensure their well-being throughout the session.

Proper maintenance and handling of electroplay devices are also essential. Regularly inspect the equipment for any damage or wear, and follow the manufacturer’s instructions for safe usage. Ensuring that all devices are clean and in good working order minimizes the risk of accidents and enhances the overall experience.

In essence, electroplay can be a thrilling addition to BDSM activities, offering a spectrum of sensations that go beyond traditional impact play. By prioritizing safety, understanding the tools, and maintaining open communication, participants can explore this electrifying form of play with confidence and enjoyment.

Wax Play and Safety

Wax play is a popular form of sensation play within the realm of BDSM, offering a unique and intense experience for both the femdom and the masochist male submissive. It involves the controlled dripping of hot wax onto the skin, creating a combination of warmth and mild pain that many find pleasurable. However, safety is paramount to ensure that the experience remains enjoyable and free from harm.

The type of wax used in wax play is crucial. Not all waxes are created equal, and using the wrong type can lead to severe burns or skin irritation. The safest choices are usually paraffin, soy, or beeswax candles, as they tend to have lower melting points compared to other types of wax. Avoid candles made from materials like stearin, which burn at higher temperatures and can cause significant harm to the skin.

Temperature control is another vital aspect of wax play. It’s important to test the wax temperature before applying it to your partner’s skin. This can be done by dripping a small amount onto your own wrist or forearm. The wax should feel warm but not overly hot. Additionally, keeping the wax at a safe distance from the skin while dripping can help mitigate the risk of burns. Generally, holding the candle about 18 inches above the skin is a good rule of thumb.

When it comes to application methods, slow and steady is the best approach. Start with small amounts of wax and gradually increase the quantity as your partner becomes more accustomed to the sensation. Communication is key during this process; always check in with your partner to ensure they are comfortable and not in excessive pain. It’s also advisable to have a safe word in place that can be used to pause or stop the activity if needed.

Post-play care is just as important as the actual wax play. Gently remove any remaining wax using a blunt-edged tool or your fingers, and avoid using sharp objects that could cut the skin. Afterward, soothe the skin with a moisturizing lotion or aloe vera to alleviate any potential irritation.

By understanding the types of wax that are safe to use, mastering the methods of application, and managing the temperature effectively, you can engage in wax play that is both thrilling and safe. This ensures a positive and pain-free experience for both the femdom and the masochist male submissive, allowing for deeper connection and enjoyment.

Stress Positions and Predicament Bondage

Stress positions and predicament bondage offer unique methods to inflict discomfort without resorting to impact play. These techniques focus on positioning the submissive in ways that can become uncomfortable over time, thereby enhancing the dynamic between the dominant and submissive. Unlike traditional forms of impact play, stress positions and predicament bondage rely on the body’s natural reactions to uncomfortable stances, making them an intriguing alternative.

Various stress positions can be employed, each designed to challenge the submissive’s endurance and mental fortitude. Common examples include the “wall sit,” where the submissive holds a squatting position against a wall, and the “plank,” where they maintain a push-up stance. These positions are straightforward yet effective in creating the desired discomfort. Additionally, more complex positions can be utilized, such as holding a weight in extended arms or balancing on one leg. The key is to select positions that can be held safely for a period but will become increasingly taxing over time.

When setting up stress positions, safety should always be a priority. It is essential to ensure the submissive can maintain the position without causing harm. Using padded surfaces or supportive props can help mitigate the risk of injury. Clear communication is crucial; both parties should agree on safe words or signals to indicate when a position needs to be adjusted or ended. Monitoring the submissive’s physical and emotional state is equally important, as prolonged stress positions can lead to strain or injury if not managed properly.

Predicament bondage, a variation of stress positions, involves placing the submissive in a scenario where they must choose between two discomforts. For example, they might be positioned such that moving in one direction causes pain, while staying still results in muscle fatigue. This adds a psychological element to the physical challenge, enhancing the overall experience. As with stress positions, the dominant must keep a close watch on their partner’s well-being, ensuring the predicament remains within safe and consensual boundaries.

By incorporating stress positions and predicament bondage into your play, you can explore new dimensions of power dynamics while prioritizing safety and consent. These techniques offer a versatile and engaging way to experience discomfort, making them a valuable addition to any femdom masochist male submissive relationship.

Uncooked Rice Play and Safety

Uncooked rice play is a unique and often underexplored method within the realm of femdom masochist activities, offering a distinctive blend of discomfort and endurance without the need for impact play. The concept is relatively simple: the submissive is required to kneel on a surface covered with uncooked rice. Despite its simplicity, uncooked rice play can evoke intense sensations due to the pressure points created by the individual grains, making it a powerful tool for those seeking a pain-free yet challenging experience.

To set up uncooked rice play, begin by selecting a suitable surface. A hard, flat area such as a tiled or wooden floor is preferable. Spread a generous layer of uncooked rice, ensuring an even distribution to avoid concentrated pressure points that could lead to skin damage. For added safety and hygiene, consider placing the rice on a clean towel or mat. This setup minimizes the risk of infection from potential skin abrasions.

Before commencing the play, clear communication between the dominant and submissive is essential. Establish safe words or signals that allow the submissive to express discomfort or the need to stop if the sensations become overwhelming. Monitoring the duration of the kneeling is crucial; prolonged exposure to the pressure points can cause bruising or cuts, especially on sensitive skin. Start with short intervals, gradually increasing the duration as the submissive becomes more accustomed to the sensations.

Post-play care is equally important. After the session, inspect the submissive’s knees for any signs of redness, swelling, or broken skin. Applying a soothing lotion or antiseptic cream can help alleviate any irritation and prevent infections. Encourage the submissive to rest and hydrate, aiding in overall recovery.

Uncooked rice play, when conducted with careful planning and attention to safety, can provide an exhilarating alternative to traditional impact play. By adhering to these guidelines, both participants can enjoy a fulfilling and pain-free exploration of their dynamic.

Ice Play and Safety

Ice play, a popular form of sensation play in BDSM, utilizes the stark contrast of cold to electrify the senses and heighten the overall experience. This technique can be an exhilarating way to engage a masochist male submissive, offering a unique alternative to more traditional methods like impact play. The application of ice on the skin can range from a gentle, teasing touch to a more intense, sustained sensation, making it a versatile tool in any Femdom’s repertoire.

To begin, it’s important to understand the various ways ice can be incorporated into play. Simple methods include running an ice cube over the skin, allowing the cold to provoke delightful shivers and heightened sensitivity. For an advanced experience, ice can be combined with other elements such as wax or heat, creating a juxtaposition of sensations that can be both thrilling and challenging for the submissive.

However, safety is paramount when engaging in ice play. The primary risk associated with this practice is frostbite or other cold-related injuries. To mitigate these risks, it is crucial to never leave ice in direct contact with the skin for extended periods. Instead, opt for intermittent application, allowing the skin to warm up between sessions. Wrapping the ice in a soft cloth or using ice packs designed for skin contact can also help reduce the risk of frostbite.

Additionally, continuously communicate with your submissive to gauge their comfort levels and ensure their well-being. Monitoring the skin for signs of excessive redness, numbness, or pain is essential. If any of these symptoms appear, promptly cease the activity and allow the skin to return to a normal temperature.

By adhering to these safety guidelines and remaining attentive to your submissive’s responses, ice play can be a thrilling and safe addition to your BDSM practices. This method not only deepens the connection between Dominant and submissive but also expands the range of sensations that can be explored, ensuring a diverse and fulfilling experience.

Needle Play and Safety

Needle play is a form of sensation play that involves the use of sterile needles to create controlled punctures in the skin. This practice, often enjoyed by masochist male submissives and their dominants, requires a high level of trust, precision, and adherence to safety protocols to ensure it remains a pleasurable and pain-free experience. Understanding the types of needles that can be used, the proper technique for insertion and removal, and the necessary safety measures are all crucial elements of engaging in needle play safely.

The types of needles commonly used in needle play include hypodermic needles, acupuncture needles, and sometimes medical-grade piercing needles. Hypodermic needles are typically used for their availability and varying gauge sizes, allowing for different sensations. Acupuncture needles are finer and may be preferred for more intricate patterns or lighter sensations. Regardless of the type, all needles used should be new, sterile, and disposed of properly after a single use to prevent infection.

Proper technique is essential for both insertion and removal of needles. The skin should be thoroughly cleaned with an antiseptic solution before and after the needles are applied. When inserting the needle, it should be done at a shallow angle to avoid deep tissue damage, and care should be taken to avoid areas where veins or nerves are close to the surface. The needle should glide smoothly into the skin with minimal resistance; any significant pain or resistance may indicate that the insertion angle should be adjusted. Removal should be done gently and slowly to minimize tissue trauma.

Safety measures are paramount in needle play. Ensuring a clean and sterile environment is the first step. Wearing gloves during the procedure can further reduce the risk of infection. It’s also important to have a basic understanding of first aid and to have supplies like bandages and disinfectants on hand in case of accidental injury. Monitoring the submissive’s response and ensuring they are comfortable and consensually participating at all times is critical. Open communication is key; the submissive should feel free to voice concerns or request the cessation of the activity if discomfort or distress arises.

By adhering to these guidelines, needle play can be an exciting and safe way to explore pain and pleasure dynamics within a femdom relationship. Proper preparation, technique, and safety measures ensure a positive experience for both parties involved.

Conclusion: Embracing Variety in BDSM Play

In the realm of BDSM, the dynamic between a femdom and her masochist male submissive can be enriched through a plethora of pain-free techniques. These methods not only diversify the experience but also prioritize the safety and consent of all participants involved. By exploring alternatives to impact play, such as sensory deprivation, role-playing, and psychological domination, couples can deepen their connection and enhance their mutual satisfaction.

The importance of safety and consent cannot be overstated. Establishing clear boundaries and maintaining open communication are essential for a fulfilling and respectful BDSM relationship. It is crucial to remember that the well-being of both the dominant and the submissive should always be a priority. This ensures that the experience remains enjoyable and consensual for all parties involved.

Encouraging variety in BDSM play allows for a more nuanced and intricate exploration of power dynamics. Techniques like mind games, erotic hypnosis, and sensual teasing provide opportunities for both partners to engage in a mentally stimulating and emotionally intense experience. These methods can be tailored to suit individual preferences, making each encounter unique and personalized.

Ultimately, the key to a successful BDSM relationship lies in the willingness to explore and experiment with different techniques while maintaining a strong foundation of trust and communication. By incorporating pain-free methods into their play, femdoms and their masochist male submissives can create a more diverse and enriching dynamic. This not only enhances their personal connection but also ensures that their experiences remain safe, consensual, and enjoyable.

As you venture into the world of pain-free BDSM practices, remember to respect each other’s boundaries and continuously seek mutual consent. Embracing variety in your play can lead to a deeper understanding of each other’s desires and a more fulfilling, harmonious relationship.

Resource Article MissBonnie 2024

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Rope Flogger

Table of Contents

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Creating a Rope Flogger for Femdom Impact Play: A Step-by-Step Guide

Introduction to Rope Floggers

For those interested in the world of femdom and impact play, creating your own rope flogger can be a rewarding experience. A rope flogger is a versatile, customizable tool that can deliver a variety of sensations, making it an excellent addition to your collection of BDSM implements. In this guide, we’ll walk you through the process of making a rope flogger step-by-step.

Materials Needed

Before you begin, you’ll need a few essential materials. These include:

  • Rope (cotton or synthetic, approximately 30-40 feet)
  • A handle (a piece of dowel rod or a repurposed handle from another tool)
  • Scissors
  • Tape
  • Glue (optional)

Ensure the rope you select is soft and flexible enough to prevent injury during play.

Step-by-Step Instructions

Step 1: Measure and cut the rope into equal lengths. The standard length is around 18-24 inches per strand, but this can be adjusted according to preference.

Step 2: Secure one end of the rope strands to the handle using tape. This forms the base from which the flogger will extend. If you’re using glue in addition to tape, let it dry completely before proceeding to the next step.

Step 3: Arrange the rope strands evenly around the handle. Once satisfied with the arrangement, use additional tape to secure the strands tightly in place.

Step 4: To ensure durability and added grip, wrap another layer of tape around the handle, covering the exposed ends of the rope strands.

Caring for Your Rope Flogger

Routine maintenance and care will extend the life of your rope flogger. Clean the flogger after each use by gently wiping down the rope strands and handle with a damp cloth. Store your flogger in a cool, dry place to prevent damage and wear.

With your new rope flogger, you can explore new dimensions of impact play within the context of femdom, enhancing both trust and intimacy in your relationship. Remember, safety and communication are paramount.

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Whipping

…Why is Whipping So Much Fun? 

Why is whipping fun? One way of thinking about whipping is as another way of touching someone. People who are just getting into SM frequently play with spanking; it’s fun to be spanked! It’s a punishment, it’s a strong stimulus, it hurts very pleasurably. But if you’ve ever spanked anyone for a long time you know that your spanking hand wears out quickly!

Well, that’s what whips are for – to allow you to hit someone for a longer time, without tiring out. There are many varieties of whips (cat-o-nine tails, heavy floggers, canes, light braided switches, suede pussy whips, and on and on), all of which feel very different and which have their own individual effect. A whip-loving top will often carry a veritable arsenal of different floggers, but they are all extensions of the top’s touch. Indeed, when I whip or cane someone, I feel as though I am touching them – as though the instrument is an extension of my arm and my desire.

There are deeper reasons why the variety is so diverse. A whipping scene will often start off very lightly, with the top using a small whip to sensitize the bottom and get them into the rhythm of the scene, switching to heavier and heavier whips as the bottom gets deeper and deeper, more and more receptive to additional sensation. Of course, the top may choose to lead the bottom on any kind of tactile journey the top desires–switching from stinging light switches to biting canes to soft fleeces. (Yes, it can feel GREAT when your top stops hitting you and suddenly brushes a velvet cloth against your back! Or maybe an ice cube…). It’s all about physical sensation.

floggers
hanging floggers

Quite often people in the scene describe whips as being “thuddy” or “stingy.” Thuddy whips land with a solid impact; they shove you, they feel like a cross between a hug and a punch. Stingy whips land with a bite; they feel like a cross between a scratch and a slap. Both kinds of sensation are enjoyable in different ways, and a skilled top can alternate thud and sting (and then some!) to create waves of sensation that wash their bottom into ecstasy.

Most people enjoy a slow build-up when being whipped. This can culminate in an explosive climax of impacts, leaving both top and bottom drained and delighted. Or it can wind down gently, ending casually. Or it can stop feeling good suddenly, resulting in a safeword. Or it can turn into a galloping intense sex scene! But the general “start slow, build up, end intensely” tempo is common to many SM scenes: from gentle to stronger to WOW and then back to gentle, then a little stronger, then WOW!!… and gentle again. It’s the motion of the ocean, as they say. It takes practice to know how to use this to blow your bottom’s mind, but the more you learn, the more skilled you will be, and believe me, these skills – teasing your partner and making them feel better and Better and BETTER – are very useful in non-SM contexts as well!

Whips aren’t the end of the story. Some people use paddles – of leather or wood, sometimes with holes cut in them to decrease air resistance and make for a harder impact. Paddles produce a solid “smack!” which can feel like a super-powerful spanking. Some players like canes, which can be thick or thin, stiff or relatively flexible. Canes can produce some of the strongest impacts of all – the “whick!” of a quick-moving cane is distinctive. Not everyone can handle the intensely focused pain canes can produce, but those who can tend to greatly enjoy it. Wooden spoons and kitchen spatulas have been pressed into service as instruments of flagellation. For a while, Nerf bats were very popular in some San Francisco parties I went to. (Bonk!) If none of this makes any sense to you, well, if you have to ask, you might not understand.

Whipping or spanking is sometimes used as part of a “punishment” scene, in which the pretext for the scene is that the bottom has been disobedient or naughty in some way which requires chastisement. This can be fun to do as role-playing, but it may not work in a more long-term D&S dynamic. Bottoms often find it erotic to receive non-damaging sensation from their top – and of course any scene causing permanent damage is not safe nor sane. If your bottom learns that the best way to get enjoyably beaten is to misbehave, you’ll have a very bad bottom on your hands. It’s often then best to separate “play” punishments – which are intended to be fun – from “real” punishments involving seriously broken agreements. Here is where reality and fantasy need to be delicately separated, and here is where the real world differs from S&M fiction.

When whipping someone, be careful. Heavy whipping is usually done on the back or ass, simply because those are the parts of the body which can take it most readily. Be careful of hitting the spine, which can break the skin where the vertebrae come close to the surface. Stay away from the kidneys, as kidney damage can occur if you hit them too hard. Stay away from the neck, for the same reasons you avoided the spine. Be aware that if you hit someone hard enough (which may be lighter than you’d think) you will bruise them, and if you keep going you can break the skin, which is decidedly unsafe sex; and leather or string whips are tough to clean. For this reason, some dedicated masochists have their own toys which have come in contact with their blood, and henceforth can be used only on them. Whippings like this are very strenuous, but as with all SM, you can start out light and get only as heavy as you want! Bruises will heal (even large ones), as will light cuts or abrasions, but you should know how to avoid unintended damage that won’t be so accommodating.

One thing to watch for (a distant risk, but worth knowing): melanoma, a form of skin cancer, can be worsened by skin trauma. If you see a mole on your bottom’s back that looks uneven, discolored, or different than it used to, avoid that area, and have them see a dermatologist.

Based on materials written by Rob Jellinghaus; © 2000; republished here with his permission

Related Articles:

Floggers – How to use a flogger and get it right.
Different strokes – Different strokes, for different folks
A tale to tell – Flogger designs and materials
Spanking – Spanking know how.
Whipping guide – A general guide to whip play.
Bull whip safety – A general guide.
Melanoma & SM play – know the dangers.
Canes – How to use a cane the right way
Florentine flogging – Florentine flogging is a two-handed style of flagellation.
Synchronized flogging – (Video tutorial) instruction to Synchronized flogging

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Breaking In Your New Whip

As any quality leather good, a Whip usually needs to be broken in not to only to assess its merits (impact, weight, etc.), but also to gauge the responses it brings forth from the submissive.

bullwhip

To break in a Whip, you first need a whipping post, and a subbie tied up to a post. This assumes you are an experienced whip user. Otherwise, skip the boy for now–just practice on the post!

Swinging a bullwhip may require a lot of space, so be sure to have your boy take down frames and things in the playroom that the Whip could catch in its path. Then you can tie him up! Don’t forget a nice, wide collar and a good weightlifter’s belt to protect the boy’s sensitive parts is a good start if your not overly confident . You may also want to wear full leather or solid clothing to protect yourself. Swing the Whip to the boy’s back for a while and ask for some feedback. (Take the gag off at that point.) Then, proceed to the boy’s butt and ask for more feedback. The boy’s input will help you decide when and where to use the Whip for optimal results.

Keeping you whip in peak condition.

Cleaning Whips is not that tricky, (unless you need to get rid of blood stains) Here’s how to maintain your Whip:

  • 1. Rub the Whip along its length with a mixture of water and a good quality Saddle Soap (easy on the water).
  • 2. Dry in open air. Never put leather near a direct heat source–it damages the leather by contracting it and eventually cracking it. It may take a couple of days for the Whip to dry thoroughly, so hang it so the air cirruates the leather or lay it down flat if you haven’t the room or wish to keep it hidden . Do not allow to dry with a kink in it.
  • 3. Once dry, wipe the excess soap with a soft cloth. It will give the Whip a nice shine too.

More dos and don’ts:

  • * Store the Whip, clean, in a dark, dry place. Sunlight would dry it out, and dirt may crack the leather.
  • * Coil it along its natural bend. Do not tighten the coils unnecessarily.
  • * If you don’t like the shine on the Whip, use your boy’s tongue to clean the handle.( spit will dull it)
  • * If your boy’s tongue does not do a good job, soak the Whip in brine (lightly salted water) and use it on the boy–that should teach him some manners!

In any case, do not oil the Whip: It makes the leather become too soft and eventually crack or rip. Plus makes the handle slippery and put off your aim.

Using Your Whip

Depending on the Whip you use, and where you use it, you may want to position your boy so that he can fully appreciate his whipping. Here are a few favorite my positions

Whipping the butt:

  • * Bent over a horse or table with feet and hands secured to the support posts. Avoid having your boy grabbing his ankles and stand without any support: This causes a great pain in the lower back and distracts the boy from the focus of your actions–his butt. Of course, if you want to whip him for a long time, you can have him clean your girlfriends Boots with his tongue while you warm his butt
  • * Spread-eagled, face down on a bed or the floor: This is a nice position because it does not spread the butt muscles thin but rather bunches them up for a nice rippling effect.
  • * On the bed, with arms and feet tied together and to a wall behind the boy’s head. You can either have the boy spread his legs or keep them together; in either case you will have nice access to the boy’s butt and the tender flesh of his thighs.
  • * Bent over with head firmly locked between your Boots (if he failed to clean them properly).
  • * Whipping the back:
  • * Standing, spread-eagled, against a wall, with a Boot hanging from the boy’s balls. To keep the boy’s head up and protect his neck, a posture collar is good, and so is a hood attached from its top to the ceiling (just make sure the boy does not pass out!). Alternate the whipping between one side and the other, starting with the shoulder bones, proceeding to the shoulders and ribs (watch for the nipples). Finish with his butt for good measure.

Hanging upside-down with the arms tied in front. Your boy will swing back and forth and wiggle, unable to escape his punishment. If you do not want your boy to swing, anchor his collar to a ring on the floor and/or hang him with his legs spread wide.

Whipping the chest:

  • * Hog-tied (in the back) on the floor. You’ll see your boy squirm around while trying to escape your Whip. A nice work-out!
  • * Spread-eagled facing forward (on a bed or against a wall). Do not forget to hang a Boot from his balls if he is standing up!

This list is under no circumstance exhaustive. It just gives you an idea of how to get your boy to focus on the impact of the Whip rather than being distracted by muscular problems or a determination to keep his footing (if he is not tied up). If you have two boys (or a female to add to the mix;) ) to discipline, it is always a good idea to tie them together so they share the experience of your whipping. Spread-eagled face-to-face or butt-to-butt, on the floor in a sixty-nine position, for two males bending over with their balls tied to each other’s balls, are all excellent positions.

Resource Article : MissBonnie © collarncuffs.com

Related Articles:

Floggers – How to use a flogger and get it right.
Different strokes – Different strokes, for different folks
A tale to tell – Flogger designs and materials
Spanking – Spanking know how.
Whipping guide – A general guide to whip play.
Bull whip safety – A general guide.
Melanoma & SM play – know the dangers.
Canes – How to use a cane the right way
Florentine flogging – Florentine flogging is a two-handed style of flagellation.
Synchronized flogging – (Video tutorial) instruction to Synchronized flogging

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Floggers

Distribution policy:

(This article is reprinted from the library of the Society for Human Sexuality at the University of Washington. While there have been some changes in the formatting to make the document more appealing to the eye, there have been no changes in the text.)

Comments, ideas and constructive criticism always welcomed. As with all of my postings, any archivist is welcome to copy and distribute this story appropriately without let or hindrance, provided that the distribution is free of charge and the entire posting remains intact and unedited.

Disclaimer of a legal sort

Striking the human body must be considered dangerous. As I am neither a medical nor a legal professional, the following is offered as my opinion only, not a recommendation for any activity. Nothing can possibly replace personal experience and learning directly from those who have been there before. There are now workshops and demonstrations available in larger cities, avail yourself of one. I have no control over the use of this information, use it at your own risk. And as ever, proceed with caring.

WITH WHAT?-

A ‘flogger’ shall remain for the moment ‘any flexible many-tailed striking tool where the tails are simple strips of leather or similar substances, designed for use on the human body’. In short, not bullwhips, braided cat-o-nines, crops, scourges, thudtoys and such, simply floggers. A braided cat is similar to a flogger in many respects, yet has a distinct ‘feel’, both these and floggers with knotted ends are left for another discussion.

As floggers were less available in former days, many people made their own in various styles and weights. Even if you are not doing so, some basic principles of design might help you select a superior one from the regrettably large supply of the other sort. I shall not include specific designs, the subject has been done to death before, and they are readily available elsewhere. As Janet Heartwood has provided excellent information in her ‘Heartwood Catalog’, I have used a similar format in my materials listing below. Although I have not ordered from her and can give no opinion, her wares seem well received among posters here.

A group of floggers
hanging floggers

Design notes-

For any given force, the smaller the contact area that force is concentrated in, the greater the potential for damage. Think of a knife edge as the extreme case. This is why quality flogger tails have rounded edges and tips; although sharp edges require less work and are less expensive, rounded edges are preferable.

The wider the tail, the more surface area to be forced through the air, and again, the more lands at once on the skin. As a general rule for the same material, thin tails ‘sting’, wide tails ‘thud’. Thin, rounded thong tails sting much more than 5/8 inch wide flat tails, for example.

If all things are equal, the more tails a flogger has, the slower it travels, and the longer the tails are, the more leverage is gained. Both of the above make a flogger heavier, but the longer tails can make it disproportionately more difficult to control, therefore many of the ‘standard’ floggers have tail lengths between 15 and 22 inches. It is possible to do quite interesting things with a long flogger, such as laying it down an entire back at once, but this is not recommended for beginners as it can take serious practise to do well. Very short floggers have special uses for close work, one nipple at a time, that sort of thing. Floggers with perhaps 15 to 25 tails are average, twice that makes a heavier version of the same design.

For safety, flogger tails must remain fixed to the end of the handle; this region is where the most stress occurs in use. A good covering knot will help reduce this strain, and keep the tails together. The handle must work with your hand, not against it, neither too large nor small for a proper grip, and a knot or swelling near the end of the flogger serves to prevent slippage. Short handles are better for control, longer handles provide more leverage. The weight of the handle must feel ‘right’ with the tails [something one must feel, not read about. If the sellers will not allow a cautious swing of prospective purchases, find another shop].

Beyond weight, width and length, the materials matter most. I have personal experience only with the following, perhaps others may share their knowledge as well. A selection from the below provides a range of severity and feelings from ‘did you start yet?’ to ‘Omi god!’. Again in general, the softer and lighter the material, the safer it is [the harder/longer it may be used without risk], and the softer it feels. As ever,

~the RESPONSIBLE TOP TESTS each implement on herself before it touches a bottom, and checks for breakage or other safety problems before each use.~

Material List-

An ounce or two of loosely twisted cotton wool in a pillowcase folded lengthwise- this and the next two have been useful for those with no experience with flogging, yet much interest. Quite safe, I originally tested mine by repeated strikes to my own face with no effect.

Chamois-

a more permanent version of the above, a 3/8 inch tail width 20-tail is a specialized tool for flogging either a complete novice or one who prefers nearly no sensation. Noise, a very light skin-level sensation, and nothing else, tested as above. Of course it may also cause her to look back at you and ask if that is all you plan on doing….

Fabric-

silk and other softer fabrics can be made into floggers. Avoid fraying of edges by sewing the fabric into closed tubes, ironing each tube flat, then sewing the flat sides together along the long axis. Similar to chamois, more decorative colors available, and many fabrics are washable.

Deerskin-

soft and caressing, a tiny bit of sting, a bit of thud, and little else. Unless one is hitting exceptionally hard, a deerskin flogger can be used for a very long time without any notable skin reactions beyond a light flush. My personal favorite for light play or the less experienced.

Light Nylon Cordage [1/8 inch diameter for a start]

Take 15 loops 34 inches long [circumference], tying them together in a knot at one end. Cut the other end [tail length now perhaps 15 inches], fray the cut ends and attach to a handle. Two sensations, a very light one from brushing with the tips alone, and a heavier one from the non-frayed section. Simple to clean, quite inexpensive, and different weights of cord are readily available. Elkhide- heavier than Deerskin, yet soft and compressible, almost entirely thud. A lovely flogger for a slow building scene, very easy to relax into, and can be used with astonishing force with little risk of harm.

The next three are varieties of cowhide, the ‘standard’ leather. These are not specific cuts or tanning terms, but are classes of weight and type.

Suede-

in the lighter varieties, slightly harder than Elk, in the heaviest, just below the thick Topgrain below. Many floggers are made from various suede ‘splits’, these are inexpensive and simple to work. More thud and more sting than those above, may mark if swung sharply. Topgrain leather- smooth leathers create less friction than suedes, yet usually feel more ‘sting-y’ on the skin. Available in many weights, from light garment leathers to heavy saddle leathers, the more flexible varieties are recommended.

Oil tanned thick leather-

thick, heavy, and spongy leather, less flexible than thinner skins. Feels rather like an extremely heavy Elk as it compresses, yet a far more ‘serious’ thud.

Bison-

Interesting rough grain, heavy, rather inflexible, unless careful attention is taken the edges may cut the skin. Not a material for the beginner, but certainly something to use if desired.

Rubber-

flexible, yet quite ‘harsh’ feeling, stings rather like a thong flogger, leaves immediate marks. Different weight to air resistance ratio than any leather I am aware of. Exceptionally simple to clean.

Horsehair-

Extreme sting with no thud, entirely skin-level sensation of a very intense and itching sort. It is possible to break skin with horsehair, and it creates deceptively intense stinging at a very light touch. Cleanliness and body fluid precautions are required here, IMO. Additionally, most of these have tactile and scent qualities that may attract some, with the exception of the pillowcase, fabric, nylon, and the oil-tanned leather [much of which smells rather nasty]. All except the pillowcase may be made into floggers that look rather nice, and all of the above are now available ready-made through shops and catalogs.

Technique-

Much has been discussed, experienced, debated, and counter-debated here and elsewhere on this personal topic, but as this is intended as a generic suggestion for the beginner, perhaps there is a possibility we might avoid the usual flamewar-of-the-moment? Of course it would be wonderful if others would add their own ideas to this basic outline [subtle hint].

WHERE?

Where to flog? Where not?-

As ‘flogging’ is something that covers much by way of different activities, I have taken the liberty of separating it into ‘light’ [entirely sting, no deep tissue effects], and ‘heavy’ [sting and/or thud, reaching and jarring deep tissue]. *Hint* it is impossible to do ‘heavy’ flogging with a 20-tail chamois flogger, and quite difficult to do ‘light’ flogging with anything over deerskin in the materials progression cited above [with the exception of horsehair, again a sting-only material].

Of course all of these are merely physical ‘possibilities’ rated solely on my own opinions of [relative] safety, all limits and preferences of top and bottom must also be considered.

Where not to flog ‘under any circumstances’ [obvious safety reasons]-

The face, head, neck, the fingers and toes, over healing skin [if you want it to ever heal:-|].

Where to flog *extremely* lightly and carefully if at all [Really a gentle brushing motion rather than a striking one, tips of a *light* stinging instrument only, such as the chamois or horsehair above]-

The palms and back of the hands, over any joint, the lower front and back and sides between the top of the pelvis and the lower ribs [kidneys and other internal organs], the spine, the tops and bottoms of the feet.

N.B. Both feet and hands contain many tiny bones, once broken, these rarely heal well. Joints do not respond well to stress internal or external. Crippling is neither safe nor sane and unless one has an X-ray machine at call one cannot tell. Internal organs are more fragile than one might think, avoid thud entirely in their area. Many people have particular problems with body areas as well, do attempt the above *very* lightly indeed if at all!

Where to flog lightly-

Lower legs, arms, inner arms, breasts, genitals [skin is more fragile there], upper shoulders [accuracy], top of buttocks near spine, the muscular ridge on both sides of the spine [accuracy], the ribs where not protected by muscle.

N.B. There is some evidence that ‘thud’ on the female breast is not advisable for reasons of health, nipples are far better suited to strong stimulation. The top of the buttocks protect the coccyx, a small and fragile triangular bone at the base of the spine, avoid striking between the upper buttocks.

Where to flog ‘heavily’-

Buttocks, upper back on each side of the spine, thighs, lower shoulders. These areas are principally composed of strong bones protected by muscle tissue and a fatty layer, any other organs present are reasonably protected. There are reasons for these traditional areas being so traditional, they reduce the likelihood of major damage, making an extended safer session possible.

Position considerations-

Body position affects the position of both skin and muscles. If someone is bent over, the muscles of the rear lengthen and are not as thick, so the muscles themselves no longer protect in the same way. If the skin is stretched as well, it will feel more than it would if relaxed. Flogging someone who is standing unsupported may lead to falling, and seems foolish given the known physiological and psychological effects [‘going away’]. Standing bondage changes without warning to partial suspension if someone faints, plan for that possibility.

HOW?- Technique repertoire-

The more ways one knows to do an action, the more effects may be created, and the less one’s arm aches afterwards. Varying the motions has a good effect for top and bottom. Practice the following until you can do them from various directions and speeds, they all feel and work differently. Knowing the techniques is only one part, knowing which to use and when is beyond my ability to suggest in a post.

Swinging styles-

I know of four basic ways to end a stroke of any force:

  • [1] The tails land ‘flat’, with all of the force hitting at once [the tails either bounce off or drop almost vertically after this].
  • [2] The tails swing ‘through’, with the some part of the tips hitting and moving past the target area. From there, you may stop them [see ‘Accuracy-‘ below], or use some elliptical pattern to bring them round again, such as vertical or horizontal figure-8, circle, and the like.
  • [2a] The tail tips strike, go past, then immediately return via a swift spinning motion. If fast enough, this can seem continuous and the light, sharp touch has some sensational advantages.
  • [3] The tails are snapped or ‘whipped’ for a smaller point of stimulation that is more discrete and feels ‘sharper’.
  • [4] The tails land all at once on the body in a strongly forward motion resembling a punch or push more than a swing. Difficult to describe, and not as common, a hard thud stroke.

Each of these and all their variations may be primarily accomplished by wrist motion alone, or with arm and wrist moving together, this depends on your strength and the effect you seek. A properly balanced flogger requires less effort, and may be used for a longer time with less fatigue.

Skill-

I would like to add my voice to [I believe] Mauser’s previous post on this, bad technique is simply inexcusable; although we are all fallible, misplacing a stroke is not something to be taken lightly. There is indeed an art to the physical act of flogging. This may be learned as any other physical art, by observation, thought, and practice.

Practice in the air will teach you the balance of a flogger, but there is no substitute for actual impact. I believe it was STella who suggested a velvet pillow, and another person suggested suspending it in a way that allowed for movement. This works nicely, a safe and useful simulation.

If you rarely find velvet pillows strewn about, a towel wrapped round a pillow will serve the same purpose, you will see the path of the flogger tails quite nicely in the nap of the fabric. When you are able to land all the tails in one area on the pillow, practice moving that aiming point about until you know exactly where it will land each time. Now practice varying the speed, pace and strength of the blows without sacrificing that accuracy. When you have that in balance, try these variations on your own leg, get the feel of that specific instrument, *then* consider using it on the willing form of another.

Accuracy-

A flogger [as opposed to a crop or whip] ‘flops around more’, it naturally covers a wider area and is more difficult to control. If one avoids any spin on the handle, the first stroke may be accurate with the tails close together. Unfortunately the next ones tend to be less so unless some care is taken with the tails between strokes. The tails may be caught in the free hand between strokes, allowed to wrap gently on the top’s torso or leg to gather them together, or hang straight down between strokes. Any of these options will make the next stroke more accurate as the tails will at least start together. It is possible to stop them in mid-air as well, but more difficult to cause them to swing together. With practice, a well-made flogger that is 2 inches in diameter with the tails gathered together may be precisely placed within a 3 to 4 inch target path.

As a suggestion for beginners, start with the bottom reclining face down and the top kneeling or standing a-straddle, thus allowing gravity to assist in the guidance of the tails.

Swinging at a body part that protrudes ensures accuracy. The buttocks of a standing bottom whose entire front is pressed against a rigid support are a classic example of this, a straight side-to-side swing with the tips of a flogger can strike only the intended area, leaving the lower back and upper thighs untouched. Costuming may help as well, certain corsets may provide some protection for the kidneys, and may act as a sort of armor against mishap.

Wrapping-

If the middle section of tails strikes first on a rounded ‘edge’ of the body, and the tips ‘wrap’ following the curve, the tips actually accelerate far more than the original swing [physics, try it on something inanimate and see]. This is ‘wraparound’, and is usually a bad thing, causing inadvertent hard blows to areas one did not intend to touch at all, or ruining the controlled stroke one did intend. Keeping the flogger handle the same distance away from the skin as you did in practice will help here, as will being very careful to plan where the tips will fall at each stroke, avoiding curved edges to wrap around.

Being ‘tip conscious’ is the best way to avoid wraparound, but placing a pillow to protect the side of a reclining bottom works as a temporary solution for those who have this problem [works neatly with ‘whippy’ canes and crops as well].

IN SCENE-

How often?-

An average of one stroke every few seconds often proves best, with the exception of the spinning technique above, a fast version of which will seem constant. This ‘blow-rest-blow’ allows processing time to feel each sensation, and this rhythm once established may easily be changed for effect. No doubt some people will differ with me on this, but I maintain that it is a suitable pace to maintain in many cases. Increased speed near the end is also popular, and pacing oneself early on will allow for that.

Scene Structure-

Different people seek to give and receive different experiences. I offer two quite diverse scenarios to begin the discussion, perhaps others might volunteer their own favorite experiences or methods.

The slowly building endorphin encouragement-

Start slowly and lightly, begin by placing the flogger on the skin, holding the tail tips in one hand and the handle in the other, moving slowly to and fro on the skin. Then a slow caress with the tips for a bit, using more and more of the tails in a soft motion, building the movement into a partial swing, then a full swing. Vary placement gradually, work up and down the body in a methodical pattern with few surprises. When changing to a ‘harder’ flogger, repeat the above ‘accustomization’ process in miniature, the ideal being that although the actual force applied increases markedly, the ‘feeling’ remains much the same, matching the growing ability of the bottom to enjoy the increasing sensations. In a person looking for this, it is often possible to cause a ‘flying’ sensation of complete relaxation, buoyed by trust and natural reactions of the body to slowly increasing stimulation, with little or no feeling of actual ‘pain’.

The overwhelming sensation-

More of a ‘hard’ style than the above, to take a bottom past the ‘comfortable’ area into one more likely to push her strongly. Useful for ‘sensation overload’ and for those who seek a more ‘painful’ feeling. Beginning as above, vary the speed and intensity of the blows much more, pushing more, being less predictable. Work upper body and lower at seemingly random times, not allowing the bottom to grow used to the sensation before moving on. When changing instruments, do so with less subtlety, let her feel the change as an increase in intensity. Should he enjoy both sting and thud, use these interchangeably as well, surprise is often more effective than merely increasing the power of blows. Emotional and other considerations [IMO]-

A few suggestions in this admittedly most subjective area. A flogging of even the gentlest sort may have exceptionally strong effects on both participants; leaving time and energy to ‘wind down’ at the end of the session is, in my view, a requirement. Reassurance, a caress, or a simple touch during the flogging may do wonders also. Do not expect verbal responses if the flogging takes the bottom into new areas, he may not be possible to speak readily, and it may be that he will not be hearing well either. I find that flogging the front of the body, use of ear plugs and blindfolds, stringent bondage to open up delicate body areas, and making the bottom look at himself being flogged all are more ‘serious’ and have more emotional impact than a ‘simple’ flogging. Bruises may appear immediately, not appear at all, or suddenly appear after as much as a day or two, depending on the body concerned, and most people have some reaction to such marks, whether positive or not.

Philosophy-

Flogging can be a powerful and loving act, top and bottom not separated by the flogger, but connected through it. While basic competence and sensitivity will increase the chances of this, caring does help a bit too.

Resource Article : MissBonnie © collarncuffs.com

Related Articles:
Different strokes – Different strokes, for different folks
A tale to tell – Flogger designs and materials
Whip Breaking – Whip care & breaking in a new whip.
Spanking – Spanking know how.
Whipping guide – A general guide to whip play.
Bull whip safety – A general guide.
Melanoma & SM play – know the dangers.
Canes – How to use a cane the right way
Florentine flogging – Florentine flogging is a two-handed style of flagellation.
Synchronized flogging – (Video tutorial) instruction to Synchronized flogging


Need more advice or videos? Many more ideas, hints, tips and discussions are located in Free Video and PDF download section within the Free Femdom Community

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Synchronized flogging

Florentine flogging is a two-handed style of flagellation used in BDSM which involves the rhythmic use of a pair of matching floggers, one in each hand of the person administering the flogging.

The term Florentine originally designates the art of wielding two weapons at once, one in each hand. For instance, it can refer to fighting with one sword in each hand, or a sword and a dagger. It is a style developed by the Italians in the city of Florence, hence the name

This video demonstrates the two beat weave/four point florentine movements with a pair of 5′ paracord snignal(signal) whips by Lauren and MidWest Whips.




Messing around in a flogging workshop at Dream Visions Photo Studio in Surrey, UK. Slow 6-point florentine.

Related Articles:

Floggers – How to use a flogger and get it right.
Different strokes – Different strokes, for different folks
A tale to tell – Flogger designs and materials
Whip Breaking – Whip care & breaking in a new whip.
Spanking – Spanking know how.
Whipping guide – A general guide to whip play.
Bull whip safety – A general guide.
Melanoma & SM play – know the dangers.
Canes – How to use a cane the right way
Florentine flogging – Florentine flogging is a two-handed style of flagellation.

Posted on

Melanoma Dangers During SM Play

mans back with Melanoma

Table of Contents

Quick Summary

Melanoma is an increasingly common form of life-threatening cancer, usually found on the skin, and known for its early and rapid tendency to spread to other organs. Melanoma is frequently found on the back – a location often whipped during SM play. The back is also a location not easy for a person to examine themselves. Studies have shown that manipulation of a melanoma (and a whip stroke, spank, or other type of blow would, obviously, be a form of “manipulation”) definitely increases the number of cancer cells that break off and begin to spread to other parts of the body. It is therefore essential that SM practitioners know how to spot possible melanomas, both on themselves and on their partners, to avoid whipping or otherwise disturbing melanomas, and to receive early, definitive medical diagnosis and treatment.

Basic Facts

Melanoma is a form of cancer that arises from a type of cell called melanocytes. Most of these cells are, obviously, in the skin, but melanocytes are also in the mucous membranes, under the nails, in the mouth, and in the eye (including the retina). Melanomas can develop from the sites of existing skin lesions or can develop on their own in areas of previously clear skin.

Melanoma is the eighth most common form of cancer in the United States and currently accounts for about 2% of all cancer deaths, with 6,900 deaths predicted for 1994. The U.S. death rate from melanoma has been growing steadily at a rate of about 4% per year for the last thirty years and is now more than double what it was in 1960. The frequency of melanoma is expected to continue increasing.

The skin is by far the most common melanoma site. About 600,000 new cases of skin cancer are diagnosed in the U.S. each year. Roughly 95% of these are “relatively” benign basal cell or squamous cell carcinomas and about 5% (32,000 cases) are melanomas. (Non-melanoma skin cancers are predicted to cause 2,300 deaths in 1994.)

Risk Factors

The average overall lifetime risk of developing melanoma is about one in a hundred. Melanoma is most commonly found in fair-skinned Caucasian people, especially if they have blue eyes and naturally blonde or red hair. It is more common in people who have a family history of melanoma, and more common in people who have more than fifty ordinary moles. Melanoma is most frequently found in people aged twenty to sixty. A strong correlation exists between episodes of severe sunburn during childhood and increased risk of developing melanoma later in life.

Exposure to sunlight

Exposure to large amounts of sunlight, both in childhood and as an adult, increases the probability of certain subtypes of melanomas appearing, but not of others. (There are four basic subtypes.) Melanomas are more frequent near the equator, and the population of Arizona has the highest frequency of melanoma in the United States. Cancer prevention authorities recommend the use of sun block with a SPF of 15 or greater.

Melanoma and non-Caucasians

Melanoma is distinctly rare in non-Caucasians, and all but unheard of in Asians. Non-Caucasians face about one-twelfth the average overall lifetime risk of melanoma that Caucasians face. (Still, 200+ non-Caucasians die of melanoma every year – the majority of them either Black or Hispanic.) When a melanoma is found on a non-Caucasian, it is usually found on the palms or soles, under the nails, on a mucous membrane (including inside the mouth), or within the eye. Melanoma and people with HIV Melanoma is distinctly more frequent and more aggressive in people who have HIV or are otherwise immunosuppressed. These people must be watched especially carefully.

Location on the body

Melanomas can appear anywhere on the body’s surface, including the ano-genital region, the hair on the head, the inside of the mouth – including the palate, and the interior of the eye. The back and lower legs are the most common sites in women. The back, chest, abdomen, and arms are the most common sites in men. (The issue of whether or not melanomas can be encapsulated with breast cysts – and possibly released during heavy breast play – was not itself specifically explored during the research done for this article; no mention of such a phenomenon was noted in the references consulted.)

Appearance of Melanoma

Melanomas are described according to the classic ABCD criteria:

  • Asymmetry: Common moles are both round and symmetrical. A line drawn through a melanoma, no matter from what direction, will not create matching halves.
  • Border: Common moles usually have smooth, even borders. Melanoma borders are usually uneven.
  • Color: Common moles are usually a uniform shade of brown. Melanomas can be of differing shades of brown, and/or may have various patches of red, white, or blue skin. (When I was in medical school I heard it referred to as “the patriotic lesion” for this reason.)
  • Diameter. Common moles are usually six millimeters – a quarter of an inch – or less in diameter. (About the size of a pencil eraser.) Melanomas, particularly in their early stages, can be larger.

Some authorities add a fifth (E) criteria:

  • Elevation: A dark nodule elevated above the rest of the skin can be a melanoma.

Detection

Experts recommend that each person conduct a monthly self-examination of their skin, including their scalp. Mirrors can help a great deal, as can a helpful partner. Learn the location, size, color, and other characteristics of whatever marks your skin already has. This will allow you to quickly detect any changes in existing marks or the appearance of new ones. “Knowing your skin,” particularly the skin on your back, is your first, best line of defense against this very serious disease.

This monthly self-exam should be supplemented with an unhurried annual examination of your skin by an experienced physician. (One physician I consulted stressed this point, and also cautioned that not all examinations done by physicians are unhurried.)

Several different sources cautioned that moles which bleed relatively easily should be regarded with the traditional “high index of suspicion.”

Treatment

Treatment is usually by excisional biopsy, which involves removing the entire lesion plus a few centimeters of surrounding healthy skin. A pathologist then evaluates the tissue. If the suspected melanoma is unusually large, an incisional biopsy is done. However this is avoided if possible because of concerns that cutting into the melanoma might cause it to shed cells. In the case of melanomas that are exceptionally large, or on a location that has cosmetic importance, such as the face, the patient may be referred to a plastic surgeon.

Complications and Prognosis

Melanoma can metastasize by either the bloodstream or the lymphatic system. If found while still localized, the overall five-year-survival rate is in excess of 90%. If the disease has spread to the local lymph nodes but no farther, the five-year-survival rate is approximately 50%. If the disease has spread beyond the lymph nodes, typically to sites such as the liver, lungs, bones, or brain, the five-year-survival rate is less than 15%. Melanomas on the torso have a grimmer prognosis than do melanomas on the limbs because less “filtering” by the lymphatic system occurs in that region.

Pathology

Cancer cells do not bond to each other as strongly as healthy cells usually bond to each other. Therefore, many cancer sites “leak” cells, which then travel elsewhere in the body, to a greater degree than healthy tissues leak cells. This is known as increased friability.

Studies have definitely proven that manipulating a melanoma increases the number of cancer cells that break off and “float downstream” (or is it “upstream”?). While the body’s immune system consumes most such cells, preventing them from forming new cancer sites, it certainly cannot be assumed all such cells will be so consumed.

Medical professionals are cautioned not to manipulate a suspected melanoma site any more than absolutely necessary. The treatment is excisional biopsy if at all possible. Incisional biopsies, and other cuttings of the site, are avoided unless clearly necessary. Electrolysists are trained not to stick their needles (which can give off heat, or electricity, or both) into moles. There could also be Sports Medicine aspects, particularly regarding contact sports such as football or the martial arts.

SM-related precautions include not whipping or otherwise striking a possible melanoma, not piercing or cutting through it, and noticing if a mole starts to bleed after being whipped. Those about to receive a whipping, piercing, or cutting should caution their partners about “suspicious” moles on their skin. In addition, subjecting the site to intense heat (from dripping candle wax, for example) or to jolts of electricity (from a cattle prod or violet wand) could also be much more risky than previously thought.

Conclusion

While many sadomasochists like “on the edge” play, I doubt that many would want their submissive partners, no matter how self-sacrificing, to risk getting a fatal case of cancer. Like many other cancers, melanoma is almost completely curable if detected and treated early. Informed, monthly self-examination of the skin is the most important step.

Check your partner’s skin. If you spot a funny-looking mole, don’t whip it!

Resource Article : MissBonnie © collarncuffs.com (Disclaimer fact where correct at time of publication)

Related Articles:

Floggers – How to use a flogger and get it right.
Different strokes – Different strokes, for different folks
A tale to tell – Flogger designs and materials
Whip Breaking – Whip care & breaking in a new whip.
Spanking – Spanking know how.
Whipping guide – A general guide to whip play.
Bull whip safety – A general guide.
Canes – How to use a cane the right way
Florentine flogging – Florentine flogging is a two-handed style of flagellation.
Synchronized flogging – (Video tutorial) instruction to Synchronized flogging

Posted on

Florentine Flogging


Florentine flogging is a two-handed style of flagellation used in BDSM which involves the rhythmic use of a pair of matching floggers, one in each hand of the person administering the flogging. The term Florentine originally designates the art of wielding two weapons at once, one in each hand. For instance, it can refer to fighting with one sword in each hand, or a sword and a dagger. It is a style developed by the Italians in the city of Florence, hence the name.

Florentine floggers

The florentine flogging strikes can follow two different patterns:

  • “Four-Count” is the basic florentine pattern where the arm that stays above the other one remains the same.
  • “Six-Count” is a more elaborate pattern that alternates the arm that is above the other. It is also called full Florentine.

The ‘count’ denotes points in the pattern where a strike lands on the target. For the four-count, there will be four hits before the pattern starts again. Four-count florentine flogging

This is a step by step description of the four-count florentine flogging pattern. Both hands will travel roughly through a horizontal figure 8, or ‘infinity sign’, following each other.

Starting position

This position is only useful to place the arms in the proper place to get started. The hands will no longer be in that position during the pattern.

  • Both hands start on the same side of the body (for instance on the left side in that description), positioned as if holding a small box between them, at waist height.
  • From this position the right hand will lift up to just above the left shoulder height

Count 1

  • The right hand extends outward and swings diagonally, down and across the body towards the opposite (right) hip. It strikes the target with a backhand motion when it is about midway through the swing.
  • The left hand raises towards the left shoulder height. The right hand continues to travel past the right hip. The left hand in position to begin a forehand swing.

Count 2

  • The left hand extends and swings down towards opposite (right) hip in a forehand motion It hits the target about half way through the swing, as it follows the path of the right hand.
  • The right hand raises towards the right shoulder height. This will help clear the way for the left hand as it swings through. The left hand reaches the position near the right hip.

Count 3

  • The right hand extends as it swings down towards the opposite (left) hip, striking the target in a forehand motion. The left hand continues in its figure 8 path and the two arms are now crossed.This step when the arms cross can be tricky as they restrict each other’s motion. Twisting the body a bit to the right as the left hand moves helps keeping the arms free of each other. Lifting the right shoulder as it swings in this step is also helpful. Dropping the left shoulder a bit as the left hand raises to shoulder height will help to move through this position.
  • The right hand is moving up towards shoulder height, with a bent lifted elbow to make room for the left arm to swing.

Count 4

  • The left hand extends outward and down, diagonally towards the left hip, following the right hand path, striking the target in a backhand motion. The right hand is moving up to position to start its next swing, and clear the area for the left hand to swing through.

If the torso was twisted earlier to ease the crossing of the arms, the body now twists back comfortably to a neutral position. The pattern begins again. The next position is count 1 for the right hand to start its next swing.

Article MistressAsTemptingAsSin AKA IamDesire © Collarncuffs.com (page now returning 404)

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