Not Sure On How To Do Anything Or What’s Here At CollarNcuffs
We Got You! Frequently Asked questions
![Facts and Answers](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/faq.jpeg)
Real-Life Benefits of Kinky Online Social Networking Exploring kink VIA Social media means you can gain social confidence from interacting with other people online, which may help you feel more secure in new situations, such as going to munchies, joining a convention or skill share gathering, and meeting new kinky friends in real time.
Because social networking—like everything else online—is constantly evolving, kinksters can become more familiar with new and emerging technologies, as well as increase their Femdom knowledge and literacy through exposure to many different types of online media that are shared by their friends. The more people that use Femdom Based social media the more people will form a common language use. Uniting us in a common interest.
Many kinksters find support in online communities; this is especially true for kinksters who have unique interests or feel isolated due to location or finances. Free to use Femdom social networking sites such as CollarNcuffs encourages kinksters and fetishists to find other kinksters who are interested in the same thing or may be dealing with similar issues.
Online communities can be very diverse and expose you to new many new viewpoints, ideas, and opinions that you may not be familiar with.
Social Networking is good augment—not replace—their real-world relationships, helping us all learn to communicate in many different ways. Social networking is becoming an increasingly important method of communicating in BDSM world, so it’s good for your you to be prepared to communicate through sites like CollarNcuffs and Fetlife.
Keeping in touch with Kinky members that live far away can become much easier through the use of online kinky social networking. By sharing updates, photos, videos, and messages, kinksters and fetishists can stay connected even if the live across the country—or the world. Social networking gives us the ability to not feel alone or isolated due to our kinky interests or fetishes. Kinksters and Fetishist are just the click of mouse away.
Old Members Returning
If you were a member prior to May fourth 2024. Unfortunately due to the bad management of the last server host we have lost almost everything. We had to start afresh
You will need to re Join and re Register
You can find the Register link on just about all pages. It’s simple, fill in your details and follow the prompts. Of course you can use your previous details so we know who you are or pick a new if your sick of the old one. You will need to verify your email and your ready to sign in.
Remember to look in your spam folder for the Verification Email if it doesn’t appear in your inbox.
So lovely of you to return and keep checking in. If you’ve been checking to see if we re launched your cache will be full of OLD data that needs to be removed.
Not sure how to clean your cache?
We got you
How to clean your web browser (external link to university information technology services )
or if you prefer
How to clean your web browsers (external link PC mag Australia)
Any problems at all please use the contact us or locate it below on every page. We are happy to help. Please be patient and remember not everyone shares your timezone.
We are looking forward to seeing you again. We can’t wait to catch up with everyone.
While there are risks inherent in ANY online social networking when kink is involved, there are also many potential benefits. Social networking can provide opportunities for new relationships as well as strengthening existing relationships, whether your friends are close to home or across the world. It's important to be vigilant when your getting involved in online social networking, but it’s also good to encourage positive relationships through various avenues, including the Internet. Why shouldn't all facets of your personality be catered for online!
CollarNcuffs.com is a FREE Social Network for those interested or participating in the Femdom Fetish Community . It's 100% Free and always will be! We have seen from other Fetish and Femdom sites that turning community sites like this to paysite just doesn't work. We are not building a membership to then go pay. We will always be free to use
MissBonnie
"I felt frustrated on other sites. I think after observing the failed attempts to profit from the fetish community over the last 20 years, I came to the conclusion that such a community NEEDS to be free, and remain free forever. That is why I created this site in 2006. This has been the main reason behind and CNC and will remain so. Finding the answers to being loved YOUR way, shouldn't leave you being held to ransom on a paysite just because we are different to the majority "
Live Chat with picture and photo share publicly and private, video and document uploading. Voice messages and Cam (currently turned off, events only)
Customizable Profiles with Video, Slide shows, Document storage and sharing and more
Social Wall: Lets you share posts, images, videos and more.
Users can send and receive public or private messages, giving users the option to have a private discussion about a topic.
Friend Connections: The ability to send, accept, or remove friendships, makes for a connected community of users
Full control of Privacy Settings and self controlled member blocking if needed.
Photo & Video sharing
Forums with attachment uploads
Follows & Unfollow Like Facebook and Twitter, users can choose to see the posts that interest you
Notifications & Notices: Regular notifications of Comments, Likes, Group Invites, and more
Points & Badges: We reward your site use with points and badges.
Ratings & Reviews: peer-to-peer feedback and reviews from real people.
Site wide notice Alerts
Bookmark Posts: Users can save social wall posts to view them later, and control the privacy of their bookmarks.
Site Directories: a Member directory, Groups directory and Activities directory, for searchable lists of what’s going on in your community.
Emoticons & Smileys: a wide selection of emoticons to brighten up wall posts, comments and messages, keeping your postings active and fresh.
Extended Profiles: Create an unlimited number of custom fields, make them optional or required, searchable, and control your visibility to other users.
Media Uploader: the Media Uploader lets you upload images, videos, audio, and many different file types to put their content out there.
Likes System: You can Like and Unlike wall posts, and view a list of people who have also liked the post.
Comments & Replies: Nothing builds an online community like a comment thread! You can comment on wall posts or reply to existing comments to share opinions and create discussions.
Share Activities: You can repost other users posts that they love, or find interesting to share it with their friends and followers. They can also bring back life to their old posts.
Mention Friends: Use @mentions in posts, comments, group feeds and more, to invite friends into a discussion or highlight content that they might like to see.
Mood & Activities: You can add your mood (or activity) – to your own posts. You can also share what you are watching on TV, eating, drinking and more. feel at home on your community.
Attachments: Users can add attachments of any type like images, videos, audios, files... to messages, activity comments and replies.
GIFs: Users can add GIFs (located on emote tab) as an activity post or use them in the comments. As visual information is more appealing, GIF's are so much fun so we also added them to the Chatroom!
Journaling
Podcasts
Quizzes
Self ran Groups: Create and manage public, private, and secret groups, and set your own admins and moderators. Create the sense of community and shared interest.
Detailed and Personalized Activity Feeds with fully customization and even gif support.
Detailed membered Search
Detailed Resources and Articles search
Event Announcements and easy submission form
Polls
Webcam Room (currently disabled will open for special events)
Free Resources and Articles, site summited and member submitted.
Member submitted Stories and poems
Free video and resource PDF downloads
Free E learning programs. Explore our programs
And TONS MORE FEATURES!
It's Secure. Well! it is as secure as we can make it. Remember even Government Departments and banking institution have hacking attempts and successes. In simple terms if you don't want 'it' out there, don't post it, this is the best safety advise anyone could give you. If you would like your account more secure we can offer you 2 factor sign in if you require it. Just Ask the Admin to set it up for you.
To help stop spammers, and bogus Mistress/submissive accounts. We insist on verified email accounts here at CollarNcuffs. We want this site to be used properly, and verifying that the person is who they say they are will help. A verified email account is mandatory to keep your account up to date.
Having a verified email account will assist you with ongoing site enjoyment. Such as site notifications, news and updates, friends requests and personal message collection.
We routinely check for temporarily and disposable Emails accounts. Those found using these, will be marked suspended.
Well you can use one but it wont make us happy and you might find your profile is closed for inconsistencies in your details.
We try to ban Proxys and ban those using them if details are inconsistent.
We do allow occasional proxy use for times like Travel, hospitalization or at work. We call it fair use proxy! Continually proxy will get your account closed. Once ever so often is fine.
This "tolerance" is very generous. This member of the Admin team has traveled for seven days, used public Wi-Fi at different locations through out the seven days and 7 different hotels Wi-Fi and still come no where near the allowance quota!
This "proxy tolerance", when reached, the sites software will essentially give you a "time out" in order to protect the server, our site as well as your account. This isn't new or unusual, a lot of sites use the very same set ups. Log in with the wrong details and you get locked out for set periods of time. Its pretty straight forward. Then this "time out feature" has so many attempts before a full ban occurs by the server. Through out this process you do receive on screen warnings.
Using a Proxy doesn't hide you. A proxy doesn't offer you anonymity. All actions undertaken on the internet are traceable. Using a proxy only makes you **harder** to find. Using a proxy is like wearing a mask on a mask, your face is still underneath.
It is caution in your actions, words and deeds that keeps you SAFE.
**YOU control your personal information, not your proxy!**
if you don't want people to know X,Y,Z about you. Hmmm! Don't tell them!.... simple as that! there in lies the secret to personal anonymity online.
you can read a fuller explanation on WHY below
Original post admin Feb 20 '15
What are CollarNcuffs thoughts and rules on internet privacy and using Proxy?
In the past big internet companies like Facebook or Google have effectively hijacked the privacy discourse in the recent years. Their marketers managed to convince the public, other wise known as US that the most important things about privacy are superficial tools that allow hiding your online status, your public posts or your profile pictures from the people around you.
Adding these superficial tools allows companies to calm down the public and change nothing in how they are turning over private data to marketers and other third parties. This method also does nothing to stop bullying or cyber attacks
At CollarNCuffs we think that the two most important components of internet privacy should be instead:
1) Protecting your private conversations from snooping third parties, such as officials, employers, etc.
2) Protecting your personal data from third parties, such as marketers, advertisers, etc.
This is what everybody should care about, and these are some of our top priorities here at CollarNcuffs you can read more in our Privacy policy located on the page bottom
While we understand there are those that wish to remain anonymous, there is a very huge difference in retaining anonymity and outright hiding. It is these difference which have brought us to the FINAL decision that we'd prefer NO proxy are to be used on CollarNcuffs. We respect those that wish to retain anonymity. We do however, do not respect those that wish to covertly hide or practice out right deceitful behavior. If you need help or have questions about how best to retain your anonymity on the internet or in Femdom social networking situations, please contact the Admin (or MissBonnie) and we can point you to some Femdom related advise regarding safety of personal information.
So why cant *I* use a proxy? We are asked this time and time again. We thought we best we explained.
While we could chatter on for week or debate for just as long, we will try keep it brief for space.
This site exists for a few reason but of the main driving factors is free information and maintaining personal self health (emotional and physical). MissBonnie's goal has always to been to provide the information needed to conduct a happy, well balanced, safe kinky lifestyle that is free from the burden of 'self' guilt or harm.
While MissBonnie doesn't expect you shout your kinky alliance from the roof tops, she does wish you to 'gently' acknowledge (and everyone else) that Femdom isn't an legal activity, it is healthy and a natural part of human sexuality that carries no stigma or need for shame, no mental condition or need for cringe worthy behavior. By employing a proxy you are essentially lurking in the shadows undermining everything that is good about Femdom and it's practices.. You are sending the message that what you "DO" is wrong or needs to be hidden away out of shame. If you think this, then Femdom isn't for you and you'd be best seeking professional help. Femdom is about personal empowerment through sexuality
Femdom is also based in what is called SSC behavior (not sure what that is?Make it your mission you find out RIGHT NOW!) To be Consensual you need to OWN your actions and under take all actions with personal pride. Your words are your oath within Femdom, your words and actions form trust. Your kink is who you are and part of you. Denying yourself openness around like minded (others here on site), whom are trusting you to be yourself is essentially lying when you hide behind a proxy. Part of being Safe is knowing just whom you are interacting with. Both require being consensual and safe and requires personal HONESTY and honest behavior. Personal Honesty is the corner stone to functioning well balanced BDSM or Femdom. Using a proxy you are not being honest with who you are. You are not showing (here) others respect. You are not owning who you are. You are lying before you begin. You owe it yourself and others to be HONEST. How can YOU expect to share your deepest secrets from the the recesses of your mind if you can't even trust others enough...to be yourself (while retaining anonymity)
Using a Proxy doesn't hide you. A proxy doesn't offer you anonymity. All actions undertaken on the internet are traceable. Using a proxy only makes you **harder** to find. Using a proxy is like wearing a mask on a mask, your face is still underneath.
It is caution in your actions, words and deeds that keeps you SAFE.
**YOU control your personal information, not your proxy!**
if you don't want people to know X,Y,Z about you. Hmmm! Don't tell them!.... simple as that! there in lies the secret to personal anonymity online.
so want to use one? The choice is your but you do so knowing you may get your account closed if your consistency of details keeps popping up and people are querying it
NO. ONE PROFILE PER PERSON
CollarNcuffs has zero tolerance for those not adhering to our rules or those choosing to prey on on others. Those found with multiple profiles will be removed and banned from future site use.
The community rules clearly state in
2 Membership Terms, Limitations & Conditions: SECTIONS 2.1 TO -3
THAT: ONLY ONE PROFILE PER MEMBER is allowed.
Please note:
ON ENTERING COLLARNCUFFS YOU AGREE TO THESE CONDITIONS (AND MORE SO, AGREE TO BE HELD LIABLE. You stipulate to liquidated damages of $50,000.00 per such violation, and You agree to pay any and all fees incurred in the recovery of this amount, including attorneys' fees and all associated costs. We expressly reserve the right, and You stipulate, that We may assign the rights to sue for these liquidated damages to any third party claiming injury by such violation. )
by entering you are signing a digital legal agreement that is VERY legal.
If you have more than one profile now is the time to own up to the Admin Team SO WE CAN FIX YOUR OVERSIGHT.
There are those that think it is perfectly OK to lie to others and pretend to be various people, rolls and personalities, be aware~ we will find *YOU*.
Shared Profiles
Couples are requested to have TWO profiles. Very often on CNC we have groups and functions that only obtainable to one or the other sex, couples sharing profiles will miss out on valuable resources and interactions, if they limit themselves to sharing one profile. Additionally posting also becomes a troublesome area, other members do often not know to whom they are addressing within the couple.
If you need to establish an account for your partner, you will both need separate email addresses for the registration process.
Those found with shared profiles, will be requested by a profile moderator to address this. The Profile Moderator must be respected and her wishes carried out. Those not following the directive of the Profile Moderator will be deleted or banned, on a case by case situation.
Changing profile settings has never been easier at CollarNcuffs.com
You will find all profile settings can be accessed via the top "Personal Admin bar" located on the top right of your screen if you are using a PC
if you are using another device, locate the "profile" link on the site navigation menu. All changes from here on in will be the same.
PC Use: You will find all profile settings can be accessed via the top "Personal Admin bar" located on the top right of your screen if you are using a PC
clicking on the Avatar space will open your Personal Admin Bar.
Located in the dropdown menu you will see "Edit Profile" clicking/touching the clickable lick will open the link to your Edit page.
From here you can change all your personal information.
You can decide what you wish to share and just how much. All text entry areas will describe just how that information is displayed to someone viewing your profile.
Phone Use : If you are on a phone or wish to edit your profile a different way. On any page on CollarNcuffs.com find the main navigation, Locate "Profile" and click/touch to open will open to your profile editing page.
Alternatively: when looking at your profile on ANY profile page you can click/touch the EDIT symbol and edit. OF course this is only available to you and not seen by other members viewing your profile.
So you got a Email saying you have a message? Lucky you. Oh how exciting!
All notifications on site activities will be sent via Email if you are not logged in unless you have opted out to receive them. If you wish to change this and opt out. Open your personal Admin bar located on every page on the top right of screen. Clicking on the Avatar space will open a drop down menu. Look for "notification" clicking/touching notifications will open your notification settings page. From this page you can control your notifications such as:
![Notification settings page](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Capture-notification-settings-300x273.png)
![Notification settings page](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Capture-notification-settings-300x273.png)
But what if your signed in and you notice on your personal Admin Bar is lite up with a blue circle. This is your personal notification Alert. Clicking on the notice will open to the correct page for you to see what alerts you have.
alternately you can open your personal Admin bar and select messages from the drop down. Clicking/ touching "Messages" will open to your personal message page "inbox"
there are a few ways to send an Email to another member
To send an Email to another member from Admin bar find "messages" "Compose"
To send an Email to another member from your profile email symbol
to send an Email while viewing someone's profile
or you can use the "members" listings. Locate the persons membership card EG that you wish to contact and click/touch the Message Icon
marking as read is easy too. all you need to do is in your opened inbox, locate the EYE and toggle on or off to mark as read or not read. You can also Delete and star if you wish to keep it highlighted
replying is as simple as opening the Email and locating the reply window on the bottom of you're conversation. you can even add attachments such as pictures or documents
Method 1 :
1. Go to your personal admin bar located on the top of the page
click to open, click edit profile
your full profile will open.
click on each of the highlighted areas will open the upload page
from here you can either select one off your PC or take one. You can even use a gravatar if you have one . you will be given the chance to crop your image if needed.
Method 2:
if you are on a phone or some tablets. Locate the "profile" link on the site navigation menu. The process remains the same as above although the layout may appear a little different.
Posting images to your profile on CNC is a little different but yet easy once you get the hang of it.
To post an image to your profile. Locate the "activity" feed on the sites main navigation list. The "activity" feed shows you every thing happening on site that is not a "community" post. (you can see community posts on the right hand side)
To upload an Image to your profile:
Open the "activity feed"
the very FIRST entry text box you see (like above) is your access to all things "activity" (it will have your name) from here you can do a lot of things but for this FAQ we will talk about uploading an image to your personal Album.
To upload a image to your "album" on your "profile" like below
use the text box off the "activity" feed. (E.G the first image)
by clicking on the "more ..." as highlight on the top right
a full selection menu will open like below
For Example I picked an image of Oz (MissBonnies sub) I'll highlight the picture to make it clearer. This is from my personal PC directory . Then pick "open" (highlighted)
Another window will then open that will look like (below) this but of course with your image selection! You can see the image I picked of Oz in the bottom left.
Then select just where you wish your image to be displayed (highlighted) If you are in any groups, you can also choose a group to upload to and press/push "post" in this instance we wish to post to "profile"
Upon posting your image will appear in the "activity" feed like the below
The reason it appears here : This is to alert your friends and fellow members that you posted an image. They can then "like" or "comment" on your image. Or "share" to somewhere else on the site (for EG the image I posted some one might of been posting about restraint in the community) "sharing" means it can be shared there. The image remains yours they are "sharing" that you posted an image ...its like a "repost" they not sharing YOUR image they are sharing that YOU POSTED AN IMAGE.
If you did "share" someone post, it would look like this
So by posting to your profile" You profile Album will be where your image ended up.
The image can then be viewed by anyone going to your profile and opening the "media" page (highlighted)
Each image in your album will now also have extra actions when moussed/touched over. They can be opened larger. A link can be provided to add to other posts and comments can be left. (comments can also be read on your personal profile "activity" page. This where all your site actions are recorded. depending on who is viewing this feed, the contents will adjust and change. )
So there you go! Easy hey, it just looks hard at first. We get that!
Come on pictures! Post them 😎
just please remember copyright
Not sure if you own the copyright?
In simple form, if you snapped the picture then you own it and the copyright. If you saved an image from the internet then you do not own copyright. Copy right is YOUR RESPONSIBILITY. We here at CollarNcuffs respect copyright. We do allow a 'few' copyright images for personal enjoyment, avatars or demonstration purposes under the 'fair use' act.
Again, please read the full listing of rules, this portion is only a brief fast reference point.
additionally there is now a second place you can upload.
Locate on your personal admin bar (page top right) find the "activity" "personal" click to open.
![](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Profile-Personal-Admin-Panel.png)
![](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Profile-Personal-Admin-Panel.png)
![](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Profile-Personal-Admin-Panel.png)
![](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Profile-Personal-Admin-Panel.png)
![](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Profile-Personal-Admin-Panel.png)
![](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Profile-Personal-Admin-Panel.png)
The process is identical to the instructions above.
If you are on a phone locate the "profile" tab on the community navigation bar. Open the tab called "activity" The process is identical to the instructions above.
Posting documents or files to your profile on CNC is a little different but yet easy once you get the hang of it.
To post a documents or files to your profile. Locate the "activity" feed on the sites main navigation list. The "activity" feed shows you every thing happening on site that is not a "community" post. (you can see community posts on the right hand side)
To upload a documents or files to your profile:
Open it the "activity feed"
the very FIRST entry text box you see (like above) is your access to all things "activity" (it will have your name) from here you can do a lot of things but for this FAQ we will talk about uploading a documents or files to your personal Album.
To upload a documents or files to your "album" on your "profile" like below
use the text box off the "activity" feed. (E.G the first image)
by clicking on the "more ..." as highlight on the top right
a full selection menu will open like below
select "FILE" this will open your PC, navigate and decide what file/document you wish to share.
For Example I picked one of our Bondage resources in PDF form. I'll highlight the file/document to make it clearer. This is from my personal PC directory . Then choose "open" (highlighted)
Another window will then open that will look like (below) this but of course with your File Document selection! You can see the document I choose of the Bondage resource bottom left.
Then select just where you wish your document to be displayed (highlighted) If you are in any groups, you can also choose a group to upload to and press/push "post" in this instance we wish to post to "profile"
Upon posting your documents or files file will appear in the "activity" feed like the below
The reason it appears here : This is to alert your friends and fellow members that you posted a document or file. They can then "like" or "comment" on your document. Or "share" to somewhere else on the site) "sharing" means it can be shared there. The document remains yours they are "sharing" that you posted a file document ...its like a "repost" they not sharing YOUR file they are sharing that YOU POSTED A FILE.
So by posting to your profile" You profile Album will be where your documents or files ended up.
The documents or files can then be viewed by anyone going to your profile and opening the "media" page
Each documents or files in your album will now also have extra actions when moussed/touched over. They can be opened on site by clicking or touching "download" A PDF file will look like this. A pdf can be saved or printed on the selection menu
. A link can be provided to add to other posts and comments can be left. (comments can also be read on your personal profile "activity" page. This where all your site actions are recorded. depending on who is viewing this feed, the contents will adjust and change. )
So there you go! Easy hey, it just looks hard at first. We get that!
Come on Files! Post them 😎
Additionally: there is now a second place you can upload.
Locate on your personal admin bar (page top right) find the "activity" "personal" click to open.
The process is identical to the instructions above.
If you are on a phone locate the "profile" tab on the community navigation bar. Open the tab called "activity" The process is identical to the instructions above.
Posting sound files to your profile on CNC is a little different but yet easy once you get the hang of it.
To post a sound file to your profile. Locate the "activity" feed on the sites main navigation list. The "activity" feed shows you every thing happening on site that is not a "community" post. (you can see community posts on the right hand side)
To upload a sound file to your profile:
Open it the "activity feed"
the very FIRST entry text box you see (like above) is your access to all things "activity" (it will have your name) from here you can do a lot of things but for this FAQ we will talk about uploading a sound file to your personal Album.
To upload a sound file to your "album" on your "profile" like below
use the text box off the "activity" feed. (E.G the first image)
by clicking on the "more ..." as highlight on the top right
A full selection menu will open like below
select "AUDIO" this will open your PC, navigate and decide what audio you wish to share.
For Example I picked a sound file from a phot shoot I'll highlight the audio to make it clearer. This is from my personal PC directory . Then choose "open" (highlighted)
Another window will then open that will look like (below) this but of course with your Audio selection! You can see the Audio I picked in the bottom left.
Then select just where you wish your audio to be displayed (highlighted) If you are in any groups, you can also choose a group to upload to and press/push "post" in this instance we wish to post to "profile"
Upon posting your audio file will appear in the "activity" feed like the below
The reason it appears here : This is to alert your friends and fellow members that you posted an audio file. They can then "like" or "comment" on your audio. Or "share" to somewhere else on the site "sharing" means it can be shared there. The audio remains yours they are "sharing" that you posted an image ...its like a "repost" they not sharing YOUR audio they are sharing that YOU POSTED AN AUDIO FILE.
So by posting to your profile" You profile Album will be where your audio ended up.
The Audio can then be viewed by anyone going to your profile and opening the "media" page (highlighted)
Each Audio in your album will now also have extra actions when moussed/touched over. They can be opened. A link can be provided to add to other posts and comments can be left. (comments can also be read on your personal profile "activity" page. This where all your site actions are recorded. depending on who is viewing this feed, the contents will adjust and change. )
So there you go! Easy hey, it just looks hard at first. We get that!
Come on Audio! Post them 😎
Additionally there is now a second place you can upload.
Locate on your personal admin bar (page top right)
find the "activity" "personal" click to open.
The process is identical to the instructions above.
If you are on a phone locate the "profile" tab on the community navigation bar. Open the tab called "activity"
The process is identical to the instructions above.
Posting videos to your profile on CNC is a little different but yet easy once you get the hang of it.
To post a video to your profile. Locate the "activity" feed on the sites main navigation list. The "activity" feed shows you every thing happening on site that is not a "community" post.
Open the "activity feed"
the very FIRST entry text box you see (like above) is your access to all things "activity" (it will have your name) from here you can a lot of things but for this FAQ we will talk about uploading a video to your personal Album on your profile.
To upload a video to your "album" on your "profile" so it appear like below:
use the text box off the "activity" feed. (E.G the first image)
by clicking on the "more ..." as highlighted on the top right
a full selection menu will open like below :
select "VIDEO" this will open your PC and you can decide what video you wish to share.
For Example I picked a video of a knot I'll highlight the video to make it clearer. This is from my personal PC directory . Then choose "open" (highlighted)
Another window will then open that will look like this but of course with your video selection! You can see the video that I picked to upload to my profile.
Then select just where you wish your image to be displayed (in this case your profile) If you are in any groups, you can also choose a group to upload to and press/push "post" files are best under 20 megabytes.
you will see the video loading if you are on a slower connection
( ^ like above. my connection sucks!).
once the video loads the image of the video will appear in its place
Then select just where you wish your video to be displayed. If you are in any groups, you can also choose a group to upload to and press/push "post"
Upon posting your Video will appear in the "activity" feed like the below
This is to alert your friends that you posted a video. They can then "like" or "comment" on your video. Or "share" to somewhere else on the site (for EG the video I posted some one might of been posting about restraint in the community and "sharing" means it can be shared there. The video remains yours, they are "sharing" that you posted a video ...its like a "repost" they not sharing YOUR video, they are sharing that YOU POSTED AN VIDEO.
If you did "share" someone post, it would look like this
So by posting to your "profile", Your profile Album will be where your video ended up.
The video can then be viewed by anyone going to your profile and opening the "media" page on your profile.
Each video in your album will now also have extra actions when moussed/touched over. They can be opened larger. A link can be provided to add to other posts and comments can be left. (comments can also be read on your personal profile "activity" page. This where all your site actions are recorded. Depending on who is viewing this feed, the contents will adjust and change. )
So there you go! Easy hey, it just looks hard at first.
Come on Videos! Post them 😎
additionally there is now a second place you can upload.
Locate on your personal admin bar (page top right)
find the "activity" "personal" click to open.
The process is identical to the instructions above.
If you are on a phone locate the "profile" tab on the community navigation bar. Open the tab called "activity"
The process is identical to the instructions above.
Understanding Kink Checklists
In any femdom relationship, communication is key, and kink checklists play a pivotal role in establishing clear boundaries. These checklists are not just about listing likes and dislikes; they foster open conversations that are crucial for a healthy dynamic or establishing a healthy dynamic. For some Femdom players matching is paramount.
Establishing Boundaries and creating negotiations
Boundaries are the foundation of any BDSM relationship. A kink checklist allows both partners to clearly outline what they are comfortable with and what they are not. These boundaries ensure that everyone involved feels safe and respected, enhancing trust and intimacy.
Discovering Likes and Dislikes
Kink checklists provide an opportunity to explore and discover mutual interests. Partners can use these lists to share their fantasies and desires, which can lead to more fulfilling and adventurous experiences. Knowing what excites or repels each other can significantly improve the quality of your interactions.
Promoting Open Conversation and raising interest
One of the most important aspects of a kink checklist is that it encourages open communication. Discussing each item on the list can lead to deeper conversations about needs, limits, and expectations. Open dialogue helps in understanding each other's perspectives, making the relationship more robust and harmonious.
We have several kink checklists in our Resources that you can download for your own personal use. All can be freely altered or printed. Just follow the onscreen instructions.
How To display a kink list on your profile
To display your own kink checklist all you need to do is upload a filled out and saved PDF version to your profile. If you are not sure how to upload to your profile, you can read how to upload on this FAQ. For those unsure on how to convert into a PDF file that sharable and readable on CollarNcuffs you could use the below. We get not everyone uses this kind of process all the time.
You can find the perfect shareable kink checklist to share with other right here on CNC.
We've done all the hard work.
pressing me will download the ODT file directly to your PC
Download the checklist. Save toy your PC if it doesnt automaticialy. Open the .ODT file with your software choice.
The version above will open with any word processor type software that may have. Here are some free versions if you don't have one: Google Docs, Apache OpenOffice and LibreOffice. You can also open . ODT files on Android devices by downloading and install apps such as the OpenDocument Reader App. iOS devices have similar apps such as OOReader and TOPDOX.
Fill out the kink check list , taking the time to really think about your answers. You can always go back and edit this at any time. Interests wane and grow over time. Remember to be honest with your choices. It is perfectly ok to not like something or to like something greatly. We are all so wonderfully different.
Now it's time to save. All word processors have a option to save as a PDF or export to PDF. Locate this (its normally on the drop list where you save) and save as PDF. Feel free to change the name if you want to or leave it as is. This is your kink checklist after all.
Did you answer all the document using the directions and save as PDF?
Not sure how to save as a PDF? We got you!
How To Create a PDF Using OpenOffice Print
Click the Export Directly as PDF icon to export the entire document using the default PDF settings.
Enter a filename.
Select a location to save the PDF file.
Click Save to export the file.
Can I convert to PDF in Google Drive?
On your computer, after opening Google Drive, open Google Docs using the Google Chrome browser. At the top, click File > Print. Next to “Destination,” select Save as PDF
How to convert a Word document to a PDF:
Open the file in Microsoft Word.
Convert Word document to PDF: On Windows, click the Acrobat tab, then click “Create PDF.” ...
Protect PDF: ...
Save as PDF file:
Does Google have a free PDF converter?
Yes, PDF Convert - Convert Documents - Google Workspace Marketplace. Convert your Documents to PDF and vice-versa format for free. This software is free to use and will convert your documents into PDF and vice-versa within seconds.
Now all you need to do is upload your saved to PDF altered checklist to your Profile
(we've included full instructions below). Now ALL other members can view your kink checklist. Right from your profile! All they need to open is click to open. See so simple.
Now that Dominant you've been eyeing knows what your into or visa versa. Its never been easier to share your interests on CollarNcuffs.
Don't have a word pressor? Don't worry! you can still have a kink Check list too!
You can download the unlocked PDF version and edit online. Some online editing software will require registering. If you prefer not to register to anything we have proved a link below. The linked version you can choose to not sign up (no details needed, they will delete your doc in 24 hours) and you will be able to edit as listed below. Registering you will be able to edit as intended
**link to unlocked PDF version**
A quick google we found several that will do the job, you might like to find your own. The one we have provided requires no sign ups or details to use, we understand some people distrust online services or don't want to sign up for everything. This method isn't ideal but it does work and will get the job done. We didn't look at to many as we found the first few googled did do the job needed.
The suggested link does everything required and gives you three FREE credits attempts (we are not associated with them in any form). After this you will need a registered account. Unless you google another free one! There are hundreds of online editor's
https://www.docfly.com/edit-pdf upload your saved to your PC document and selected your choices. Don't forget to save!
If you are using Chrome, PDF Editor online is an extension that allows to handle PDF files using directly your web browser.
If you are using another browser they are always updating and most offer free editors.
A quick google will give you the answer you need.
Don't forget to SAVE!
Now upload to your Profile
Now all you need to do is upload (instructions below if you are unsure on how) Upload the completed kink Check list to your Profile for all to see. All other members will now need to do, is click on it to read it.
See so simple. Now that Dominant you've been eyeing knows what your into or visa versa. Its never been easier to share your interests CollarNcuffs.
How To Upload A Document To Your Profile
Posting documents (kink checklist is a Document) or files to your profile on CNC is a little different but yet easy once you get the hang of it.
To post a documents or files to your profile. Locate the "activity" feed on the sites main navigation list. The "activity" feed shows you every thing happening on site that is not a "community" post. (you can see community posts on the right hand side)
To upload a documents or files to your profile:
Open it the "activity feed"
the very FIRST entry text box you see (like above) is your access to all things "activity" (it will have your name) from here you can do a lot of things but for this FAQ we will talk about uploading a documents or files to your personal Album.
To upload a documents or files to your "album" on your "profile" like below
use the text box off the "activity" feed. (E.G the first image)
by clicking on the "more ..." as highlight on the top right
a full selection menu will open like below
select "FILE" this will open your PC, navigate and decide what file/document you wish to share.
For Example I picked one of our Bondage resources in PDF form. I'll highlight the file/document to make it clearer. This is from my personal PC directory . Then choose "open" (highlighted)
Another window will then open that will look like (below) this but of course with your File Document selection! You can see the document I choose of the Bondage resource bottom left.
Then select just where you wish your document to be displayed (highlighted) If you are in any groups, you can also choose a group to upload to and press/push "post" in this instance we wish to post to "profile"
Upon posting your documents or files file will appear in the "activity" feed like the below
The reason it appears here : This is to alert your friends and fellow members that you posted a document or file. They can then "like" or "comment" on your document. Or "share" to somewhere else on the site) "sharing" means it can be shared there. The document remains yours they are "sharing" that you posted a file document ...its like a "repost" they not sharing YOUR file they are sharing that YOU POSTED A FILE.
So by posting to your profile" You profile Album will be where your documents or files ended up.
The documents or files can then be viewed by anyone going to your profile and opening the "media" page
Each documents or files in your album will now also have extra actions when moussed/touched over. They can be opened on site by clicking or touching "download" A PDF file will look like this. A pdf can be saved or printed on the selection menu
. A link can be provided to add to other posts and comments can be left. (comments can also be read on your personal profile "activity" page. This where all your site actions are recorded. depending on who is viewing this feed, the contents will adjust and change. )
So there you go! Easy hey, it just looks hard at first. We get that!
Come on Files! Post them 😎
Additionally: there is now a second place you can upload.
Locate on your personal admin bar (page top right) find the "activity" "personal" click to open.
The process is identical to the instructions above.
If you are on a phone locate the "profile" tab on the community navigation bar. Open the tab called "activity" The process is identical to the instructions above.
you can find the activity page on the site navigation.
on the far left you can see "whos online" The "leader board" for the busiest posters and the most recent community forum posts.
on the left hand side you have the Activity feed:
From the "Activity" page you can do so much. You can see all site updates. such as whos joined, who posted an image, video or a document etc. etc. What new resource articles have just been uploaded. In short if it happened, you'll see it here.
You can even separate all this information too :The updates of just your friends . Update from just your groups. Posts you ♥'d or just posts you been @ mentioned in.
Its also great place to have small interactions with others. I personally love to say hello in the comments to the new members, when their "Joined" alerts come up. Its a great way to make new members feel welcomed. I also love to comment on images and videos. Or post my votes to peoples polls!
Selection as is simple as toggling / clicking what you to see! and back again to see what you want . You can even filter the results on the right!
You can interact with this any way you want .....
you can leave a status up date if you want too. You can also use the preselected and fill in what your watching on TV or what your eating, even reading! plus a few more...
clicking/ touching the smile face will open the drop down
Not feeling like a preset. You can just add text. Post anything you want to alert others too. You can also add smiles or pre loaded GIFS
Adding a Gif is easy, they are new smiles. Push / Click the GIF type what gif style you would like and where you wish it go (profile/group etc.). push POST.
You post will appear to those following you and in the site general activity feed. The post will also appear on your personal activity page on your profile.
You can add a Quote using the same method
How a Quote appears on the Activity feed
I'm pretty sure you get it now! Anything listed is that easy to do.
like a poll to see what your friends think for your new toy or lingerie! Maybe you have a question you need input to? but dont want a whole conversation like a forum post.
A link to site you like or an item your thinking of buying or an image that is way to perfect or way to wrong for words! Anything goes as long it fits with the sites rules.
You also have a PERSONAL activity feed on your profile. From here you can also filter all your personal activity within CollarNcuffs.
Method 1 :
From your personal Admin bar on the top of the page
1. Go to Username > Edit Profile.
2. Open the Widget Settings.
1. Go to Profile Page.
2. Click on "Widgets Settings".
From here you add or change all the widgets such as:
BDSM and me Widget. Here you can add a photo. share some information
ome have asked for the ability to separate there "about me" and "kinks" or maybe have place to just list kinks or write more about what appeals to them about BDSM. Or write about how they currenting learning X within BDSM practices. Or even just what they looking for without cluttering the "about me" section making it appear that they more interested in hooking up than connection . We have tried to achieve this. Hence the birth of "BDSM & Me"
You can add an image or not,
you can give yourself a title and have fun with nickname changes without changing your profile name or use nothing and fields will not show. Why add this? one request was a place for temp names given to you by Dommes or to reflect collars. or a place to address that a submissive is under consideration or under protection of a Dominant.
you add our slide show widget and add a few of your stand out or favorite images
what about your favorite video? or quote you love?
we even have a link widget for a site link you'd like to share! Do you have blog elsewhere? Your own site? Please no pay sites. They can pay for there own advertising! Unsure just ask one of the Admin team or drop us a line via the contact button
From the membership directory you can click on a profile to open a persons full profile
you can tell if they are verified
You can tell if they online right now
leave personal notes called user reviews from the top right corner (stars)
see how many times a profile has been viewed.
How many friends they have
Send a friends request/ unfriend
send a private message.
See How many points
See how many people Follow them or choose to follow them yourself.
Not sure what any of these things are? We have a FAQ on all of them.
Adding Friends & Friend Requests
You can add friends by opening their "profile". Click the "Add Friend" button. when your friendship request has been accepted, it will appear on your Friends list.
or you can add new friends from the members directory. On each of the members cards you will see a "add friend"
You might not see this button on some people's profiles, depending on their privacy settings.
Once this person accepts your request, they'll show up in your Personal Profile friends list.
Who Should I Send Friend Requests To?
You should send friend requests to people you have a real-life connection to or would like to, people you wish to know better, people who you plan to correspond with regularly.
Remember those you friend, you will be receiving there activity updates. If you wish to receive activity updates in your news feed or people you find interesting but don't know personally try following them instead of sending them friend requests.
If you are trying to make new friend but never have made 'conversation' with the person, try sending a Private message first. Some Dommes and submissives are somewhat reluctant to add those that they do not know prior, through the Chat room or posts. Remember to send friend requests only to people you know personally. If requests you send go unanswered or are reported as unwelcome, you may be blocked from sending friend requests.
Also question how your profile appears to others!
is your profile all female or male? Your profile is not the place appear like you are "partner shopping"
on opening a profile you will see a "block and report"
what MissBonnie had to say on the topic of Blocking:
While this admin for the day (MissB) dislikes "block" buttons they are appearing in a lot of Adult sites. Sites that are community or forum based and social media also have had them for years. The new laws regarding your privacy also strongly suggest to webmasters that this feature "should be" available. ( a later addition to CNC will the ability to be on site hidden. We cannot add it as a feature on a new site)
This "block" feature is used in so many ways. One is just like the box read, it blocks a member from your profile and contacting you as they have no access It also stops stalking. This allows members to sort out there own issues and dramas.
Other people on a site I (MissB) frequent use it as filtering tool (I've noticed this is also building in occurrence on several others) for looking for partners. I personally think this is most stupid thing I have ever encountered but this is the thing, how you use the site is TOTALY up to you. I can see some valuable uses like for EG: you and your Ex share the site. Your Ex has done nothing wrong to breach site rules so can be here but personally you dislike this. This then put the power in your hands and doesn't tie up our Admin Team in your personal business.
So what happens when you push the button, what is seen
as you see above on the image there are options to unblock or view who you have blocked.
you can also reach these off YOUR profile
what it is what it does
anywhere you see an EYE symbol it denotes that you can mark an item read or unread. The one in the image is crossed out, it hasn't been read. Its a very handy tool if you need to come to back to something.
what is verification and where is it
the verification symbol looks like this
you can find it in a few places. On Profiles and on a members card in the membership listing .
For a person to have this symbol they need to have met our sites criteria to be marked as "verified" .
At present our site criteria is:
21 years of age or older
An acceptable username the sits well within the community standards and promotes a healthy view of Femdom. One that doesn't scream age play, maledom or isn't a submissive name with a title as Dommes have titles. All these are against our RULES
A verified Email that is fully functioning.
Clear role of Domme or Submissive that matches Gender. That there is no profiteering or solicitation. ProDomme or FinDomme profiles. We are strictly lifestyle only.
A completed "about me" section, that is at least one full sentence (wording along the lines of "to be filled out later" will not be accepted as one sentence. Gibberish will see the account closed). We also don't wish to see list of kinks unless formed into a sentence! Why? You can add your kinks but you are also more than just your kinks. Its called your "About me" section not "About my kinks" section.
Other criteria are that the location listed and IP match.
If you suspect the gender of the person you are talking to isn't correct. We will investigate further for you.
Method 1 :
1. Go to the user profile page . Any where you see a persons nick name it will open their profile when clicked.
2. Put the mouse above the header area, a new button will appear.
3. Click on "Add Review". Thats the star icon
If your using the site for dating or networking you could leave yourself notes that you have contacted this person or this person was rude to you etc. Or say you wish to remember something about them like there screen name is X but they told you to call them Adam. No one sees the star rate apart from you or the "review" left.
Method 2 :
1. Go to the members directory. you can find the directory on the Site Navigation Menu
2. Put the mouse above the user header area, a new button will appear.
3. Click on the yellow star icon.
Write your notes! Don't forget to push save.
if you wish to change your Review at any time just re open the review symbol and edit. You can tell, you can "edit" as it contains the same "edit" symbol we use site wide.
Go to your personal Admin Bar (top right screen if using PC)
Click "edit profile"
upon opening you will see the panel shown in image. Clicking on the highlighted in yellow area will allow you to make your selection between light and dark.
Starting a New Topic
Go to the board where you wish to post and click on the New Topic button (positioned by default at both the top and the bottom of the board), which will take you to the Start New Topic screen.
While this presents a number of options, the two most important are the Subject field and main text area for the message itself. Enter your subject and start typing (or paste) your message in the main text area.
Depending on your browser set up, many may be configured to offer an additional Spell Check button. Remember to check this prior to posting as you will not be able to edit after a set time limit.
Once you are happy with your message, you can post it by clicking the "submit" button.
There are 2 ways to respond in a topic.
Use the +Reply button on the top or bottom of any topic page:
A response to a topic will always open at the bottom of all replies.
So, how do you respond to a specific reply?
The answer, and the second way you can reply, is to use the “Quote feature. In every reply to a topic, on the upper right side of the reply is a link to “Quote. Scroll to the reply you want to respond to and then click “Quote:
The system will then copy the reply in its entirety and then automatically place that in a reply on the bottom. You can also edit the quote. Below is an example where you want to shorten the quote by removing parts not relevant to your response. Never, ever add something the original author did not say – this is unprofessional and a bad practice! However, you don’t have to worry about shortening or removing as this etiquette is common and understood to just focus your reply on a specific part of what the author said.
You can then respond under the quotation.
Emotes, smilies, emoji what ever you like to call them are disappearing from software. Younger generations are shifting away from them. A lot of newer software doesn't have them. but arghhh! some clever peeps at Microsoft are like this Admin and like some old school things. Right on your keyboard you have every emote, emoji or smilie you will ever need.
Did you know you can easily insert emojis in to your emails, documents, messages, and elsewhere using your Windows computer?
To access the Windows 10 emoji picker, press either of the following two shortcut combinations: I find the windows key and period/full stop to be easier for myself.
![](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/windows-period.png)
![](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/windows-period.png)
Typing either of these keyboard shortcuts will bring up an inline emoji picker, complete with search field.
![](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/emjoi-window.png)
![](https://collarncuffs.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/emjoi-window.png)
To find an emoji, you can either scroll through the list, use the category icons at the bottom of the emoji picker, or type the word for the emoji you want in your text while the emoji box is open. For example, typing the word present filters the available emoji for you. Then simply click the one you want to insert it into your post. Heck you can even use this on your emails or in fact ANY WHERE ELSE online.
To add a youtube to your post
locate the youtube you wish to add. Copy the URL
insert the URL into your post add any text you require and submit.
you youtube will then be ready to play by those reading reading
Clicking the "COG" will also give you options such as "open in new tab"
While you can edit your community posts you can only edit within a short time frame of making it. At present this is set for five minutes. If what you post is really bothering you you can ask a moderator or the Admin Team to remove it for you. For frivolous things like spelling or punctuation don't worry. We all do those even Admins.
The @mention feature allows you to reference other users in the forum. You can mention as many users as you would like. Each person who is referenced will receive an email with the link to the topic in question.
Note: Being mentioned does not mean you are automatically subscribed. You are simply being mentioned and being alerted that you were mentioned. If others also mention you, you will receive additional notifications each time.
Heres how to use the @mention function:
Here is what happens after
A signature line is a line of text on the bottom of a Community post. Its kind of like a little motto of the poster. It just appears every time they post.
So you've looked but cant figure out how to add one? That's ok, its because you can't but Admin can add one for you, you just need to ask.
You can either private message or use the contact us form on the bottom of every page.
We feel CNC is a community project and all we get a say in it's running. We are steadily growing in numbers. The Admin Team while we have 'special powers' we are not omnipresent and cannot be every where at once. This is where you come in
Reporting a member is not tattle tailing, reporting is a good thing. Reporting shows you care for YOUR community and want the best for it as a whole. Self-policing, is the process whereby a community volunteers and monitors its own adherence to legal, ethical, or safety standards, rather than have an outside monitor and enforce those standards. We the Admin Team, like to think CNC operates on this principal and that the decisions made for CollarNcuffs operation, are those that better the Community as a whole. Thus benefiting us all in the long term.
please note FYI:
Forum Moderators DO NOT have access to removing profiles/albums/blogs/chat accounts, nor access to them in any way shape or form, nor can they read private emails. Forum Moderators can remove threads/lock topics/shift topics, or mediate a 'posting' issue on the boards they moderate.
The Admin Team is responsible for ALL things NON posting and chat related.
There are many reasons to report a member. A detail on the profile looks wrong. Maledom, lost, under age, They are soliciting or asking for tribute, spam, phishing. They are abusive to wards you. etc.. etc... If you think something isn't right, then please report. Reports are not sent to the member. Your name is never mentioned to them. You are helping us to run this community in a manner that we want and need.
When you push the report button (on profile) a report box will pop up. There is a drop down of several reasons. If your reason isn't on the drop down please do not worry, it is a very short list and all reasons are pretty much the same things, BAD MEMBER. A short explanation is more important if you have time, if not just hit the send. The report will speak for itself. We don't need a lot of info. Often the member has left a trail of destruction that isn't hard to piece together!
For members that are spamming or several people reported. Three reports will automatically, remove them from the site and suspend the profile until an Admin can see to it. The member will be notified that their account suspended and to contact us if they disagree or require reasons. We do allow a right of reply.
To report a profile you need to be on the profile.
upon clicking the profile, open the "report user"
Enter your report in the box and don't forget to save! Don't worry to much if the reasons don't fit the descriptions.
If as a member you believes a topic created or a reply to an existing topic is not acceptable, it can also be reported as follows directly on the community Forum:
When you want to get notifications about anything happening (i.e. a new topic or reply) in a forum you want use the Subscribe To Forum feature. For example, if you want to stay informed about General Discussion forum as shown here without having to login to the site, setting this feature to subscribe will send you a notification and link when a new topic is created or replies to existing topics are made.
Here is how you subscribe to a forum (go to the forum you want first).
If you are either no longer interested in getting notifications from a forum that you are subscribed to or perhaps you are getting flooded with email because of too much activity, you can also unsubscribe from the forum.
Here is how you unsubscribe from a forum (go to the forum you want first).
Please note that unsubscribing from a forum will NOT also unsubscribe you from a specific topic(s) – the integrity of subscriptions are not affected in this case.
When someone has created or replied to a topic that you are interested in getting notifications and staying abreast or current, you want to use the Subscribe To Topic feature. For example, you are interested in a topic that a user creates to discuss using the Ultimate Membership Pro plugin as shown here and would like to see replies without having to login to the site. Setting this feature to subscribe to a topic will send you an email notification and link when new replies to the topic are made.
Note: If you want to reply, you must login and then add the reply to do so. At this time, it is not possible to reply by email and have that automatically added to the discussion.
Here is how you subscribe to a topic (go to the topic you want first).
Here is how you unsubscribe from a topic (go to the topic you want first).If you are no longer interested in following the topic, simply unsubscribe from it.
You can also change your global subscriptions settings in the subscriptions overview.
-
Individual Subscriptions: You only receive notifications when new content is created inside of forums/topics you are subscribed to
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New Topics: When this option is enabled, you receive notifications for all new topics created inside of forums which are accessible for you. This basically means: You are subscribed to all forums. Furthermore you can still subscribe to individual topics to get notified when a new post is written inside them.
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New Topics & Posts: When this option is enabled, you receive notifications for all new topics and posts created inside of forums and topics which are accessible for you. This basically means: You are subscribed to all forums and topics.
The Role of Communication in D/s Relationships
Effective communication is paramount in any relationship, but it holds particular significance in Dominant/submissive (D/s) dynamics. The unique power exchange and trust required in D/s relationships demand a high level of clarity and honesty between partners. Without consistent and open communication, misunderstandings and unmet expectations can quickly lead to dissatisfaction and potential failure of the relationship.
One of the primary barriers to effective communication in D/s relationships is the internal struggle faced by novice submissives. Many new to the lifestyle may feel shy, embarrassed, or intimidated when attempting to articulate their thoughts and feelings. This hesitation can stem from a lack of confidence or fear of judgment, making face-to-face conversations challenging. Additionally, long-distance D/s relationships, often facilitated by the internet, introduce another layer of complexity. The absence of physical presence can hinder the ability to convey emotions and nuances effectively.
Journaling emerges as a valuable communication tool in these scenarios. It provides submissives with a private space to introspect and document their thoughts, feelings, and experiences without the immediate pressure of a direct conversation. Through journaling, submissives can articulate their emotions more freely, enabling them to express what might be difficult to voice in person. This practice not only helps in self-discovery but also fosters deeper understanding and connection within the relationship.
For Dominants, reading their submissive's journal entries can offer profound insights into their partner's mindset, desires, and boundaries. This written form of communication allows Dominants to respond thoughtfully and address any concerns or needs that may arise. Ultimately, incorporating journaling into the communication repertoire of a D/s relationship can significantly enhance mutual understanding, trust, and intimacy, laying a solid foundation for a successful and fulfilling dynamic.
The Evolution of Journaling: From Paper to Digital
Journaling has long been a cornerstone for individuals documenting their personal journeys, including those navigating the complexities of femdom submission. Traditionally, submissives have relied on paper journals to record their thoughts, feelings, and experiences. These handwritten journals offered a tangible, private space for introspection and reflection. The act of writing by hand can be meditative and provides a physical connection to one's journey, which many find deeply personal and meaningful.
With the advent of the internet, the practice of journaling has evolved significantly. The rise of online blogs has provided an accessible and interactive platform for submissives to share their experiences with a broader audience. Online blogs allow for real-time updates, multimedia integration, and community interaction, offering a dynamic and engaging way to document one's journey. This digital shift has opened new avenues for connectivity and support among submissives, enabling them to learn from and support each other's experiences.
Despite the convenience and connectivity offered by online platforms, many submissives continue to use paper journals alongside their digital counterparts. Paper journals provide a level of privacy and intimacy that is unmatched by any digital format. They serve as a private sanctuary where one can freely express their thoughts without the influence or judgment of an audience. Conversely, online blogs offer the advantage of community engagement and the ability to receive feedback and encouragement from like-minded individuals.
Several popular blog hosting services cater to the diverse needs of users. Blogger and WordPress.com are renowned for their user-friendly interfaces and extensive customization options, making them ideal for beginners and advanced users alike. LiveJournal offers a more community-centric approach, fostering interaction through group blogs and comment threads. Vox is known for its multimedia-friendly environment, allowing users to seamlessly integrate photos, videos, and audio into their posts. For those seeking a niche platform tailored to the BDSM community, CollarnCuffs provides a specialized space to share and explore femdom-related content.
Ultimately, the choice between paper and digital journaling—or a combination of both—depends on individual preferences and needs. Each medium offers unique benefits, and many submissives find that using a blend of both allows them to fully capture and enhance their journey in femdom submission.
Different Types of Journaling for Submissives
Journaling offers submissives a unique avenue to document their journey, explore their emotions, and reflect on their experiences. There are several types of journaling that can be particularly beneficial, each serving distinct purposes and enhancing the submissive's growth and understanding within their dynamic.
Development Journaling
Development journaling is a cornerstone for many submissives. This type of journaling focuses on personal growth, learning, and introspection regarding daily behaviors and actions related to submission. By keeping a detailed record, submissives can track their progress, note areas where they excel, and identify aspects that require improvement. This form of journaling is pivotal for self-awareness and accountability, fostering a deeper understanding of one's submissive nature. Honest reflection is crucial here; without it, the journal loses its value as a tool for genuine personal development.
Journaling for Punishment
Another significant type of journaling often requested by the dominant is journaling for punishment. This form requires the submissive to document their punishments, the reasons behind them, and their reflections on how to avoid similar mistakes in the future. It serves as a structured method for understanding the consequences of one's actions and emphasizes the importance of learning and correction. The act of writing about punishment can be a humbling experience that reinforces the submissive's commitment to growth and adherence to the established rules and expectations.
Sex Blogging
Sex blogging is a more public form of journaling that involves writing explicit and engaging content about sexual experiences. This type of journaling can serve as an outlet for creative expression and can be a way to share one's journey with a broader audience. It requires a balance of honesty and discretion, as the content is often more revealing and personal. For many, sex blogging can be a liberating experience, offering a platform to explore and articulate their sexual desires and encounters within the context of their submission.
In all types of journaling, the key lies in honesty and introspection. Whether documenting personal growth, reflecting on punishments, or sharing explicit experiences, each form of journaling contributes to a richer, more nuanced understanding of one's submissive journey.
Preserving Your Authentic Voice
When embarking on the journey of journaling your femdom submission, maintaining an authentic voice is of paramount importance. Your journal should be a truthful representation of your experiences, thoughts, and feelings. Attempting to present yourself as someone you are not or fabricating events can detract from the primary purpose of journaling, which is to facilitate personal growth and self-understanding.
Authenticity in your writing allows for genuine reflection and introspection, key elements in understanding your journey and evolving within your submissive role. It also builds trust with any readers, including your dominant partner, who may look to your journal for insights into your behaviors, emotions, and growth. Presenting a facade or creating fictional content without transparency can undermine the credibility of your journal, rendering it less useful as a tool for personal development and for your dominant to understand and guide you.
It is essential to resist the temptation to embellish or alter your experiences to fit an idealized image. Authentic journaling means embracing your true self, including your vulnerabilities, mistakes, and challenges. This honesty not only enriches your own journey but also fosters a deeper, more meaningful connection with your dominant partner. They rely on your genuine reflections to tailor their guidance and support effectively.
In conclusion, let your journal be a true reflection of who you are. Use it as a space to explore your thoughts and experiences openly and honestly. By preserving your authentic voice, you create a valuable resource for yourself and your dominant partner, aiding in your mutual growth and deepening your relationship. Authenticity in journaling ensures that your journey remains personal, meaningful, and transformative.
How to Start, If You Decide to Journal at CollarNCuffs?
Starting is the easy part. Just simply start a new thread and title it with your username. You are then welcome to fill it however you like as long as it fits within our rules. Do you have a external blog already? You are welcome to share it here or via your profile in the link section.
The search functionality within the Community allows you to search inside topic titles and the content of its posts. Just enter the keywords you are looking for into the text search field in the upper right corner of the top bar and press the Enter or Return key on your keyboard.
The forum will search for your entered keyword(s) or phrase and show you the results, if there are any, ordered by relevance. From this search result view you can simply go to the desired topic.
Contained within our Community Forum we have section called
Free Downloads and Education materials
You can download a set, or a single file to keep for your personal reference. Or Watch them here.
right click to save image files.
All PDF can viewed on site. Click to open read now or save for later on the settings.
All contact examples are able to be fully edited to your needs.
All videos are free to watch and enjoy or saved for your personal refference.
All we ask is that enjoy and learn. We want nothing in return.
Stay Updated with Our Regularly Updated Femdom and BDSM Resources
Welcome to Our Femdom and BDSM Resource Hub
Welcome to our continually evolving resource hub dedicated to femdom and BDSM. If you are looking for comprehensive articles, guides, and updates on these topics, you are in the right place. Our commitment is to provide you with fresh and insightful content regularly, ensuring you have access to the latest information in the world of femdom and BDSM.
New Resources Added Every Few Days
We understand the dynamic nature of the BDSM and femdom communities, which is why we strive to keep our resources current. Approximately every few days, you will find a new article or resource added to our collection. From beginner guides to advanced techniques, our goal is to cater to enthusiasts of all experience levels.
Why You Should Check Back Often
By checking back often, you will not miss out on the latest trends, techniques, and discussions in the femdom and BDSM scenes. Our team works diligently to ensure that the content we provide is not only accurate but also engaging and informative. Whether you’re exploring new dynamics or looking to deepen your understanding, our regularly updated resources are here to support your journey.
Join Our Community
We invite you to join our community of like-minded individuals who share your interests in femdom and BDSM. Engage with our content, leave comments, and share your experiences. Your feedback is invaluable and helps us to continuously improve the content we offer.
Stay tuned and keep exploring our resource hub for the latest updates. We are excited to be a part of your journey in the world of femdom and BDSM.
To search for a resource or Article page on the specific topic.
Open your personal admin bar. Located on the page top right.
locate the search icon (magnifying glass)
enter your search query and press enter.
A page will open with your search results
I searched for "submissive" click to open what your interested in!
Groups are like a small site inside a large Site.
Groups are hosted different members on different topics. You don't need permission to open. Groups just need to be with in the site rules.
You can even choose your own Moderators to help you.
How to change groups avatar and cover
. Go to the group page and then click on tab "Manage". (you can control every setting from this setting)
2. You upload the group avatar from the sub tab "Photo"
3. You can upload the group cover from the sub tab "Cover Images"
All of our E learning programs are 100% free for you to enjoy
studyBDSM is an online cyber Adult learning environment to ‘support’ your learning and knowledge of Femdom BDSM topics and practices to work in conjunction with our already freely available resource section and our Femdom Community at CollarNcuffs
This section of CollarNcuffs.com was built to serve the purposes of a readily expanding need for Femdom resources and education for those wanting to explore the world of Female Domination via Internet in either a real time experience, or cyber domination and submission training online for no charge, 100% free.
With the introduction of the Internet it has opened the doors to many seeking or exploring their own personal sexually. More and more, adults are discovering they have an interest in Femdom but are unable to obtain the skills and information they needed to incorporate Femdom into their own life
This lifestyle is far more intimate and intimidating then most people ever realize. That’s why most people don’t get involved because they realize it is just too much for them to handle. Shyness, cost, or distance issues can also often impact on the ability to get to training centers [in person] to obtain much needed skills and resources. Lets face it Cities are bigger, traffic is bad, and we are busier with families and work pursuits than ever before. In this economic climate cost is also increasingly a limiting factor. Pre Internet that used to mean you couldn’t learn and become skilled at Femdom BDSM or what ever your kink interest is.
Some in there journey into the BDSM Femdom alternative lifestyle now turn to the Internet for the answers, as it now almost available in every home. Most try to absorb information wherever they can find it. Often the endless Google searches yield little or nothing but porn, or you realize BDSM training was far more complicated then you ever thought it was, or your not quite sure if your paying for a training course that has the content your after.
At CollarNuffs know there is a lot of information surrounding the Kinky and Femdom lifestyle and even more confusion. Everybody has their opinion. Some people agree on certain subjects others don’t. It’s hard to tell what’s what. Oh there are a few sites around that will give you tiny bits of the puzzle, here and there. But we found NOTHING that would show a complete beginner what they needed to know on the kinky lifestyle.
Our goal at CollarNcuffs.com, studyBDSM and studyFEMDOM is to simplify this growing need and make Femdom education, resources and ‘ Femdom how to’ and ‘learning BDSM’ more readily available, all on one site for those that require it.
Electronic communication is the way of the future, so we have embraced it and all it has to offer. We ALL can use online activities to deepen our understanding by sharing our ideas with others at much greater distances–others with whom we would not have been able to communicate previously. While we here at studyBDSM would hope that we would never lose sight of the tremendous value of being in a classroom situation or Femdom study/ learning/ skills center, the Internet is providing us with ways and alternative measures of sharing ideas globally and of maintaining contacts (internationally as well as locally)
If you would like to explore the world of Female dominance and male submissive / slave relationships at a closer level, we may just have your answer with one of our Femdom online skills or entertainment programs; programs that are convenient , 100% free and accessible for adults interested in Femdom pursuits at a beginners or intermediate level.
All programs are located on CollarNcuffs.com contained within specially prepared private group settings, ran in a friendly relaxed manor, you will never need to leave CollarNcuffs. All programs are totally free with no hidden costs to attend, as is all of CollarNcuffs.com. That is right not a cent to pay, 100% Free of charge.
Would You Like To know More?
All our programs are 100% FREE
Have an Event you'd like to add?
To have your event or event you are aware of listed on our Event calendar, please provide all the relevant details via our submission form located on the event calendar (top and bottom). Submitting a complete and accurate description will help ensure that your event gets the attention it deserves.
Fetlife listing links welcomed. No need to copy details. We can do that for you if you give us the link!
Required Information
When submitting your event, please include the following details:
- Event Name: The name of your event.
- Event Organizer or Website: The individual or organization responsible for the event, or a website where more information can be found. It is perfectly fine to add events that are not your own. We don't even need to give you credit, credit can go to the event host. You are simply reposting the event.
- Event Date: The date when the event will take place.
- Event Time: The time when the event starts and finishes, including your time zone of the event.
- Event Location: The venue or location where the event will be held.
Additional Information
If you wish to add photos or images to your event listing, please let us know, and we will be in touch to arrange the details. You’ll be notified if your event is added to our calendar. Please allow extra time for processing during holiday periods.
While we are newly rebuilt site, chat is often hard to meet up with smaller membership base. Feel free to add a date and time you are available and we will post this for others to see and plan. You don't need a reason. Chatting is FINE and encouraged.
Got a topic? You can even make an virtual munch with topic if you like!
Sorry but we do not delete profiles. Deleting profiles removes all. We do not remove "words" so conversations retain continuity and flow. While you may be not interested in continuing, others may benefit from posts you have appeared in. Removing posts leaves holes in conversations. Our Terms and conditions clearly state this. You agreed to this entering.
However your profile (upon request to Admin) can have all identifying factors removed such as images, emails and personal details. Your profile will then be marked as inactive. There is no connection to you other than a username. ..and your words that you have left.
To have this happen please contact "Admin" either via Admins profile or via the sites contact form and we will do this for you. Please make sure if you wish this, that you are serious as this cannot be reversed. We also ask, if you don't mind, to know why you are leaving? If it is something we have done, we like to learn from our mistakes.
Profile Has Suspended on it or Spammer?
"SUSPENDED" or "SPAMMER" profile alerts: This means the profile owner has not met CollarNcuffs criteria for on going membership. Or the member has requested to leave.
Profiles marked "SUSPENDED" or "SPAMMER" suggest the person owning the profile IS longer on the site and has been removed.
As per our practice we do not remove posts or profiles (we do remove email address so as to not spam in-boxes with future mailings. we also will remove personal images, videos and documents from profiles).
If you wish to know why a person has been marked as SUSPENDED or SPAMMER you can also contact Admin, while complete reasons will not be given to maintain a persons integrity, a general outline may be provided. We do believe in full disclosure, we will never mark a profile as SUSPENDED / SPAMMER without explainable and justified reasoning.
Some times a profile is reported as no longer reachable or the member has requested to leave. These profiles will also come under this heading (spammer/suspended) as this is how our software/system handles these requests and it cannot be changed for different occurrences. In this case the person is not suspended or a spammer they just no longer have an active profile.
If a Domme offers any services or products of any kind, or her time in exchange for money, tribute, gifts or other services or products of any value, this Domme is considered as a Professional or Financial Domme please report her and she will be removed. We have a zero tolerance policy for any form of solicitation. These profiles are often removed in total as their post often contains no value to the community, other than self promotion.
there are several ways to tell who is online. The "activity" feed located on the sites navigation has a widget located to the right of screen
You can also find a list of online members on the bottom of the community page
you can also see if looking at membership cards in the members directory, who is online by the Fluro green circle.
Bronze
Silver
Gold
platinum
Every activity on CollarNcuffs will add or remove points. As points add up, your rank will go up a level. At a later date the highest rank will earn privilege's
So why have these point and ranks?
Here is what MissBonnie had to say about them:
During my time in forums I've always found these points and badges fun and also as a trustworthy guide to knowing who has the "lay of the land" so to speak. I always knew at glance who to trust more. Whos advice or input was "sage" Who had the experience of "time" . Points , badges and ranks (hate the names) foster site engagement adding a sense of game play as well as being rewarding to those that have been on the site for years.
I've also liked to able to see history of how the points where achieved. you can tell a lot by a person on how they use a site. For E.G Are they looking at pretty pictures? Do they give advice, do they help others, Are they questioning things themselves, Are they friendly, are they just learning but still engaging with others , see they are learning and growing in their role (again this list is HUGE)....the list of things you can pick up are so valuable.
To see your point history or those on someone elses profile. Open the profile locate the "more" click/push. Then click/push "history" You will then be able to see how all the points have been gained.
To see how many points some one has or what rank/badge they are you can see a points widget on the profile
Or to see how your points rank to someone else.
locate the "activity" link on the site navigation menu. On the right hand side you you will see the points leader board
You will find our "Quiz" section located on the site navigation. At present you need to be signed in to see and use.
You'll find:
A femdom category that is informative. It will show you the correct answer if you get it wrong and at the end provide you more in-depth materials should you wish to know more.
We also have two just for fun sections on "sexual, adult related trivia" they will show the correct answer too but do not link to addition materials and are merely just general sexuality based knowledge and weird adult trivia.
At the end of each category there is a leader board and on the last page a global leader board.
they can also be added to posts ..although not sure why we would want too!
Eventually we will add personality tests (for EG. how Dominant am I, How submissive am I etc. etc.)
This symbol is "up"
where ever you see it, it will take you "up" to the page top or "close up" what you are on.
MissVixen: Every time she uses it, hears the "slide whistle" in her head 😄 Have to admit I do too!
To invite your friends is super easy! Go to your personal admin bar on the page top
click to open and locate "invitations" > send "invites"
Fill out the form to invite a new user to join CollarNcuffs. Upon submission of the form, an email will be sent to the invitee containing a link to accept your invitation. You may also add a custom message to the email.
what your friend will receive
The admin team is made up of several individuals from all walks or life and levels of experience. All do so freely, to keep costs of running the site low and keep the site free for members to use.
The Admin TEAM consists of:
MissBonnie: system operations, chat-room moderator, forum moderator, admin account caretaker, program director, user group moderator.
oz: system operations, chat-room moderator, admin account caretaker. (MissBonnie's partner) MissBonnies collared submissive NON profiled helper Although at times will use The Admin profile and test account profile.
si : system operations, admin account caretaker, NON profiled helper, and ex collared submissive MissBonnie. Although at times will use The Admin profile and test account profile.
RedWench: program director, moderator (currently absent)
MsAbbysynthe: Profile moderator, program director, forum moderator.
Program_Directors Program directors group profile name.
VixenDelicia LEAD Chatroom moderator and coordinator, forum moderator, program director.
odslutpup. Chatroom moderator and coordinator, forum moderator. Group supervisor.
Our apologies if we missed any ones duties on site, or left you off the Admin team ...
As we approach our 18 year at CNC across several re incarnations, I am writing to thank you, ‘our volunteers’ for your outstanding contribution of time, skills, energy, enthusiasm, and dedication to CNC.
By your own generous commitment, you set a wonderful example and demonstrate the power of individuals to effect remarkable change to availability of more free Femdom sites on the internet. Your help and dedication is what allows us to keep this site free from most running costs.
We here at CNC all really do appreciate the enthusiasm and commitment that is shown towards the site and its members.
So, a very heartfelt thank you, not just from me, but from all our members who benefit so greatly from your commitment.
Yours sincerely
MissB
So what does each ‘title’ mean?
Course Director: This announces that this person has given up their to time to direct one of the programs we host on studyBDSM, studyFemdom and collarNcuffs
Site Admin: this set of people are able to access the site database and correct site errors or rectify what you can’t. They are also responsible for the day to day running of collarNcuffs in addition too banning, un banning, warning the members, and establishing new profiles, and have all moderator rights privileges and functions.
Moderator: Notice we have no spam and things are posted in the appropriate areas…that’s all thanks to the moderators careful attention.
The moderators (short singular form: "mod") are volunteer users of the forum which are granted access to the posts and threads of all members for the purpose of moderating discussion (similar to arbitration) and also keeping the forum clean (neutralizing spam and spambots etc). Because they have access to all posts and threads in their area of responsibility, it is common for a knowledgeable and trustworthy member to be promoted to moderator for such a task. Moderators also, as well as responding to specific complaints. Moderators themselves may have ranks: some may be given mod privilege over only a particular topic or section, while others (called 'global' or 'super') may be allowed access anywhere. Common privileges of moderators include: deleting, merging, moving, and splitting of posts and threads; closing, renaming, stickying of threads; or adding, editing, removing the polls of threads.
Chatroom Moderators: Have you ever used our chat? Our wonderful chat mods have a huge dislike for idiots and trolls. There is nothing they like more than to boot unpleasant troll. They have the power too ban, and warning the members they feel are in breech of the chatroom rules
They will offer you help with chat problems and solutions. Mediate potential problems, but most of all offer you the user a pleasant informative chat environment.
Lead Chatroom Moderator: Many thanks to MissVixen for taking the lead in moderating out chat. All accounts not following the directives set forth by the lead chatroom moderator will be deleted or suspended from our database, within a suitable time frame, unless mediation is in progress by the Admin.
Group Moderator: Group moderators are responsible for private ‘invite’ only hidden groups. They have the ability to invite or ban members to their ’hidden’ group. They are also responsible for moderating discussion (similar to arbitration) and also keeping the forum clean (neutralizing spam and spambots etc.). Because they have access to all posts and threads in their area of responsibility, it is common for a knowledgeable and trustworthy member to be promoted to moderator for such a task. Moderators also, as well as responding to specific complaints. Moderators themselves may have ranks: some may be given mod privilege over only a particular topic or section, while others (called 'global' or 'super') may be allowed access anywhere. Common privileges of moderators include: deleting, merging, moving, and splitting of posts and threads; closing, renaming, stickying of threads; or adding, editing, removing the polls of threads.
Profile Moderator:
Ms. Abbysynthe fills this voluntary position. Ms. Abbysynthe has been a member of CollarNcuffs for many years, her experience and knowledge is greatly respected, as is her rapport with other members. The Admin feel Ms. Abbysynthe is perfect person for this position, and is welcome addition to the Admin Team.
What can Ms. Abbysynthe do : She can contact you and ask that unclear issues on your profile be rectified. Issues such as gender, Dominant or submissive role, general location, non disclosure of ProDomme/financial Dominant contained within profile. Insufficient details contained with your 'about me' section, or continuity of profile details. She also has the power to Address situations such as disrespectful profile / demeaning texts to profile. Address issues such inappropriate Avatar use, or picture use on personal profiles (eg: such as racist or Maledom images)
Why should you listen to Ms. Abbysynthe : Simply because it's part of community requirements that you meet the guidelines set out, and established by our members. We will not ask you to disclose any personal details, other than what our profile fields requests. While some play by the rules of the guidelines set out by CNC, others choose to think that these rules do NOT apply to them.
Our Profile moderator will give you time to make adjustments to your profiles, those found not compiling will be reported and deleted. Deleted profiles cannot be retrieved. While we feel this is a drastic measure, we feel in order for the site to grow and be of benefit to all, this area now needs moderating.
Objecting :If you do have objections to the Profile moderators requests and feel your reason is valid, please discuss this with the moderator in a respectful manner. The position of profile Moderator is not a paid postilion, Ms. Abbysynthe does so out of the kindness of her heart for a site she feels is worth the effort, and for people she feels worth the effort. Please respect her, and her decisions. If you feel you cannot find a solution to her requests then please take it up with the Admin account and we will mediate a workable solution.
All accounts not following the directives set forth by the profile moderator will be deleted or suspended from our database, within a suitable time frame, unless mediation is in progress by the Admin.
In the event of deletion, the Admin will try to inform you of this action using all reasonable steps within their power. In the event of not being able to contact you, we will be forced to assume that you longer require the free services of CollarNcuffs.com and delete or marked inactive/suspended.
Like to help us ? You can just Admin if there is anything that needs doing.
Without our volunteers this site can’t function. Please remember all volunteers give their time and support freely for the betterment of CNC they are normal people and normal users of this site, they are not paid in any form...please respect the time and effort they put into CNC for your benefit and the betterment of our community.
…we do appreciate all you do for CNC
Forum Moderators
MissBonnie :Australia
RedWench :United States
MsAbbysynthe :United States
Odslutpup: Canada
VixenDelicia: Canada
Profile Moderator
MsAbbysynthe
Chatroom Moderators
MissBonnie :Australia
VixenDelicia Canada (LEAD)
Chatroom "fill in/emergency moderators
RedWench :United States
MsAbbysynthe :United States
odslutpup: Canada