If you’re a pleasure seeker like me, and your inner bedroom goddess is just begging to come out and play, then you’re probably more than open to the idea of building your own personalised pleasure abode that you and your submissive can explore together.
Do you want to have more sexual freedom? Be able to explore your inner desires in a designated space? And, most importantly, have MORE FUN with sex?
I hear you, and we’ve got your back!
Whether you’re looking for a Femdom playroom or a romantic love nest, will can give you the exact steps you can follow to build the perfect sex room to satisfy all your deepest desires.
What is a BDSM or Femdom playroom?
In light of the famous “How to Build a Sex Room” show recently aired on Netflix, people from around the world are curious to know how they can also build their own BDSM rooms.
Depending on the couple’s needs and preferences, a BDSM room or sex dungeon can take many forms. It’s a room designated specifically for BDSM play and can often be found in basements. However, some people also transform their bedrooms, spare rooms, or large walk-in closets into these pleasure-inducing spaces. Inside these rooms, you can explore your deepest fantasies, including, but not limited to:
Spanking, Flogging, Resistance play, Bondage, Suspension, Roleplay and Sex toy exploration
These spaces are usually stocked with sex toys and BDSM equipment and often have different areas for various sex-related activities. But often those new to the scene have no idea what is available.
Intrigued? Well, we figured the best way is to show you what is out there:
A frame ~
Cages ~
Whipping post ~
Pillory ~
Sawhorse ~
Stocks ~
Intrigued, read on to see how YOU can build your very own BDSM space and build your very own furniture in the process.
Steps to build a BDSM room
Here’s how you can create your very own love den or BDSM dungeon in a few simple steps:
Before we get to the exciting stuff, you first need to find a space in your home that works well as a sex room. check places like Attics, cellars, spare bedrooms, and basements are all excellent choices. Even a corner of your bedroom can work. A small amount of space can work as furniture can be added or removed to suit your scene, while not perfect it does and can work. MissB is still doing so due to adult children returning home. Some furniture can also be “hidden” if not needed and disguised until needed. MissB’s St Andrews cross was cover for years with over sized painting so it appeared as a easel display. Her kids none the wiser for over two decades.
That being said, for you to be able to transform the room into the kinky space of your dreams, you need to keep a few things in mind:
Is it a good size? The room needs enough space for equipment and shouldn’t feel crowded or claustrophobic at the time of use. At the same time, you don’t want it to be too big, as this may take away the intimacy factor.
Does it have what you need? For example, if you’re planning on using wall equipment, make sure the walls are thick enough to add those fixtures. Is the ceiling high enough? Are mounting points actually safe? Etc. For those renting we recommend old doors leaning on walls as shown above in the image. They can be tucked away in wardrobes when not in use.
Is it discreet, if you need it discreet? Steamy sex can get loud — really fast! You don’t want to get noise complaints. and no a gag will not help! Nothing alerts the authority like a muffled scream LOL So make sure that your sex dungeon isn’t located right next to the neighbors. Pick a room where no one can hear you, or try to soundproof it as much as possible.
Does it have climate control? Make sure that your room doesn’t get too cold in the winter or too hot in the summer. A little hint subspace will not be reached without the correct temperature. An easy fix is to install heating or air-conditioning. Remember if your taking on this lifestyle, it is for life so it can be a solid investment.
Try plan the space’s interior design
After you’ve chosen the perfect space for your bondage room, you need to start planning what you’d like the interior to look like. Do you need it dark and menacingly evil looking or is you style different! There is no right or wrong, only what is right for you and your partner. Do not let the media perception of how a Dungeon looks on TV screen to influence your choices. This doesn’t only refer to the BDSM furniture and equipment you’ll use but the lighting, floor, wallpaper, and power as well. Do you have enough room around equipment to swing that preverbal cat!
Choose a theme and colour scheme that adds to the kinkiness.
Red, purple, gold, silver, and black are all excellent choices but maybe something else rocks your world? Do this also work for your submissive?.
Make sure you have lighting in all the right places so you and your partner can see each other throughout the entire play session — Scenes often begin in the mind first but good lighting can making it a hundred times hotter! Make sure you plan for equipment or tools that need power so that you can place them close to an electrical outlet. A great place to look for design inspiration is Pinterest or even Google Images.
Buy or make the the right sex dungeon equipment and furniture. We have several building plans listed within our resources and further added to in our Community. Furniture made by kinksters is often the best! After all they understand how it is to be used and properly use it themselves. Be wary of sex sites and sex stores selling mass produced, it is often not fit for purpose. Many rely on the fact, that being sex equipment you will not put in a complaint regarding safety! If you do buy be conscious of what you buy, though! You don’t want your pleasure dungeon filled with low-quality, cheap stuff. Make sure you look at the quality and buy from well-known, reliable retailers. Good kink equipment will last you for decades.
Here are a few other ideas of the equipment and furniture you can include in your sex room:
Beds and pillows: A bed or a lounger is the most essential piece of furniture for a sex room since it provides a sturdy surface on which you can play. A massage table can work in a pinch if you space isn’t wide enough. Additionally, you can invest in some sex pillows for different positions, under-mattress restraints that’ll help keep you constrained and ready, and also some waterproof sheets for when things get really hot and wet.
Sex swings and slings: I am a huge fan of Door Jam Slings since they don’t take up much space and require no power tools to install ( a good thing MissB with a drill is to be feared). This means that they’re also great if you’re renting an apartment! All you need to install it is a sturdy door frame.
Spanking benches and BDSM horses: If you’re into spanking and light punishment, you might consider getting a spanking bench or BDSM horse. Both are great for restraining your partner and spanking them from several angles. We have building plans for these listed in our resources. They can also be brought cheaply at hardware stores and padded with the simple use of a staple gun.
Spreader bars: Designed to spread your ankles, legs, or wrists, spreader bars are excellent for creating anticipation and keeping your partner restrained while doing naughty things to them. Yep! you got it we also have the plans for these too.
Vibrators: A sex room isn’t a sex room without some quality vibrators close by. There are tons of different vibrators for you to choose from — from clit vibrators, dildos, rabbit ears, sex wands, and so much more. Butt play tools: Butt play can be really fun since the anus is full of sensitive nerve endings. You can explore different butt tools to find something that works for you. Butt plugs, anal vibrators, and anal beads are all excellent choices.
of course this is by no means a complete and exhaustive list. There are loads more sex furniture and toys for you to choose from, such as floggers, nipple clamps, bondage gear, sex machines, and more. It all depends on what you like and want to explore. Our plan is just to give you a starting place to make your dreams into reality without breaking the budget. We have more than enough free stuff here at CollarNcuffs to get you started. Most from general every day items that can be perverted.
Sex is all about the senses: Smell, taste, feel, sound, and sight — or lack thereof 😉 that works too. You can make the room your sensual playground by adding different fragrances, textures, music, etc. Not sure how? We can help you there. CollarNcuffs has many articles and resources explaining in further detail. We even have free eLearning programs for those new and just starting out.
Another excellent way to add to the mood is to consider incorporating a full-length mirror so that you can see your body as you move, while you wear lingerie, while you’re naked — and even while you’re having sex. It can help you see yourself as a sexual person, which is powerful if you have any mental disconnect regarding your inner Goddess.
Also, remember to include a lock on your door. Locking the door when you’re ready for some serious vulva attention adds to the excitement and stops you from worrying that your kids will barge in any second as nothing says come in more, than an open door. Instead, you’ll be able to focus on all the sensations and intensify your arousal and orgasms. Does it set the scene you desire? Not sure how? Join our community and ask for help. We have several programs to help those just beginning or even those more advanced.
After you’ve designed your pleasure room, look around and be honest with yourself. Does the environment inspire you? Is there something that needs immediate change? Are things lying around? Does it set the scene you desire? Remove any clutter and anything that could remind you of your daily to-do list — there’ll be plenty of time for that AFTER you’ve had your fun. Also, try to make your BDSM room a tech-free zone. Any glowing devices that could distract you need to go. No phone, no laptop, no TV unless your following one of our how to guides. An exception to the rule is a speaker you can use to play your favorite music.
Ready for playtime?Now that you know exactly how to create your own BDSM playroom, it’s time to get to work. By building a dedicated sex room, you’ll have the chance to finally explore your deepest desires — WITHOUT any disturbances or worrying about someone barging in. You can also read our other sections on how to use these new found furniture peices safely. honestly, we got you!
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