BDSM Branding: What You Need to Know

Introduction to Femdom BDSM Branding

BDSM branding is a niche but significant practice within the broader BDSM community. At its core, branding involves marking the skin with a symbol or design, often using heat, to create a permanent or semi-permanent mark. While the concept of branding has historical roots in various cultures as a means of denoting ownership, status, or affiliation, its adoption in BDSM practices carries unique implications and meanings.

Historically, branding has been utilized for a multitude of purposes, from marking livestock to signify ownership to religious or tribal symbols denoting one’s status or role within a community. In the context of BDSM, branding is a form of body modification that can symbolize deep commitment, ownership, or belonging between consenting partners. It is a practice that, like many other aspects of BDSM, is built upon mutual consent, trust, and a thorough understanding of the emotional and psychological ramifications involved.

The psychological appeal of BDSM branding can be profound. For some individuals, the act of being branded by a partner can evoke a deep sense of connection and belonging. It is often considered a rite of passage or a testament to the strength of the bond between the individuals involved. The permanence of a brand can also symbolize an enduring commitment, serving as a physical manifestation of the emotional and psychological ties that bind the partners together.

Emotionally, the process of receiving a brand can be intense. It requires a high level of trust and vulnerability, as well as a clear understanding of the risks and responsibilities associated with such a practice. For many, the experience is empowering, providing a sense of identity and solidarity within the BDSM community. It is an act that goes beyond the physical, tapping into deep-seated desires and emotions that are often integral to the dynamics of BDSM relationships.

Dangers and Risks of BDSM Branding

BDSM branding, while a profound expression of commitment and trust within the dynamics of consensual power exchange, carries substantial risks that must be acknowledged and understood. Physically, branding involves inflicting burns on the skin to create permanent marks, which inherently carries the risk of severe burns that can lead to significant pain, infection, and long-term scarring. The process of creating these marks requires precise control and sterilization to prevent complications such as bacterial infections, which can result in more serious health issues if not properly managed.

Branding, simply put but not simple in action, is burning the skin’s surface to make a mark. This mark can be either temporary or permanent. The temporary kind is often referred to as a “surface burn.” A skillfully done surface burn will usually begin to fade within a few months; after a year, the most that will remain is a residual redness – depending upon the skin type. Extreme masochists love this type of play, which has no shortage of pain.

Permanent branding is quite a bit more complicated than one would expect. Most experienced branders work in 316L stainless steel sheet metal and shape it into different parts of the brand. They build their designs using sequential “strikes” of thin metal pieces to make the complete brand. Heated by a propane torch, the temperature is critical. Too hot, you can injure muscle tissue or ruin the brand with too much scarification. Too little heat, the brand will look weak. And all the strikes must be applied with equal pressure and identical heat or an uneven brand will result. To properly brand a person takes a lot of skill; we are, after all, not cattle. And remember, the results are not as predictable as tattoos;  you must expect some unexpected results.  

Additionally, improper aftercare can exacerbate these risks, leading to further complications. Scarring, while often intended, can vary widely in appearance and may not heal as expected, leaving the individual with unintended physical alterations. The permanence of branding means that any missteps during the procedure or in post-care can have lasting physical consequences.

Beyond the physical risks, the psychological and emotional implications of BDSM branding are equally significant. The act of branding is irreversible, and the permanence of the mark can lead to future regret or emotional distress. In some cases, individuals may experience trauma, particularly if the branding process does not go as planned or if the individual later changes their perception of the mark’s significance. The emotional weight of a permanent brand can also strain the dynamics of the relationship if one party’s feelings about the brand evolve differently over time.

Given these considerable risks, it is imperative for all parties involved to fully understand and agree to the procedure. Informed consent is crucial, ensuring that everyone involved is aware of the potential physical and emotional consequences. This agreement must be made with a clear understanding of the risks, and both parties should be prepared to handle any complications that may arise. Proper education, preparation, and aftercare are essential components in mitigating these dangers and ensuring that the experience remains safe and consensual.

Safety Precautions for BDSM Branding

Ensuring safety in BDSM branding is paramount to minimizing risks and promoting well-being. Proper preparation is essential, beginning with the selection of a sterile environment. This precaution helps to significantly reduce the likelihood of infections. The area chosen for the procedure should be thoroughly cleaned and disinfected, with all surfaces sanitized. Using clean, sanitized equipment is equally important. All tools should be sterilized before use to maintain a hygienic setting.

The role of a knowledgeable and experienced practitioner cannot be overstated. Engaging someone with expertise in BDSM branding ensures that the procedure is conducted safely and effectively. An experienced practitioner is well-versed in the nuances of branding, including the appropriate application of heat and the management of potential risks. Their expertise extends to recognizing signs of complications early and taking necessary actions to mitigate them.

Aftercare is a critical component of the branding process. Proper aftercare procedures help facilitate healing and reduce the risk of complications. Immediately following the branding, the area should be cooled to alleviate initial discomfort. Applying an antiseptic ointment can prevent infections and promote healing. It is advisable to keep the branded area clean and dry, changing dressings regularly to avoid contamination. Monitoring the site for any signs of infection, such as increased redness, swelling, or discharge, is crucial. Should any of these symptoms arise, seeking medical attention promptly is recommended.

In conclusion, the safety of BDSM branding hinges on meticulous preparation, the use of sterile equipment, skilled execution by an experienced practitioner, and diligent aftercare. By adhering to these guidelines, practitioners and participants can significantly reduce the risks associated with this practice, ensuring a safer and more satisfying experience.

How to Perform BDSM Branding

BDSM branding is a practice that requires meticulous preparation and an understanding of the various techniques involved. Two primary methods are commonly employed: hot iron branding and freeze branding. Each method comes with its own set of advantages and challenges, making it crucial to carefully choose the one that best suits your needs and comfort levels.

Hot Iron Branding: This traditional method involves heating a metal implement to a high temperature and pressing it onto the skin to create a permanent mark. The intense heat causes a burn that heals into a scar. The primary advantage of hot iron branding is the immediate visual result. However, it carries a higher risk of infection and requires more extensive aftercare. The pain level is also significantly higher, making it essential to ensure the individual undergoing the process is fully prepared and consents to the experience.

Freeze Branding: Unlike hot iron branding, freeze branding uses a supercooled metal implement, often chilled in liquid nitrogen, to damage the pigment-producing cells in the skin. This method tends to be less painful and has a lower risk of infection. The resulting mark is usually white or colorless, and its visibility can vary depending on skin tone. While freeze branding is generally considered safer, it requires a longer healing period and may not produce as pronounced a mark as hot iron branding.

When selecting a design for BDSM branding, it is important to choose a symbol or pattern that holds personal significance. The design should be simple and clear, as intricate details can become distorted during the healing process. Before proceeding, thoroughly clean and disinfect the area to be branded. Both the person performing the branding and the recipient should be aware of the steps involved and agree on a safe word or signal to ensure continuous communication.

Executing the branding process requires precision and patience. For hot iron branding, heat the implement until it is red-hot and press it firmly but briefly onto the skin. In freeze branding, ensure the implement is adequately chilled and apply it to the skin with consistent pressure. After branding, immediate aftercare is crucial. Clean the area with antiseptic and apply a sterile dressing. Monitoring the healing process and keeping the wound clean will help prevent infection and ensure the best possible outcome.

Throughout the procedure, maintaining open communication and obtaining explicit consent are paramount. BDSM branding is a permanent and highly personal form of body modification, and all parties involved should fully understand the risks and responsibilities associated with it.

Article MissBonnie 2024

Understanding Pet Play within Femdom: How It Works, Creating a Scene, and Emotional Aspects

What is Pet Play within Femdom?

Pet play is a distinctive form of role-playing within the BDSM community where participants embody the characteristics of animals. In a femdom context, this often involves one partner assuming the role of an animal, referred to as the ‘pet,’ while the other partner takes on the role of the caretaker or owner, commonly known as the ‘Domme.’ This type of role-play can manifest in various forms, including puppy play, kitten play, and pony play, each with its own unique set of behaviors and dynamics.

Puppy play typically involves the ‘pet’ adopting canine behaviors, such as barking, playing fetch, and following commands, while the Domme provides guidance, training, and care. Kitten play, on the other hand, sees the ‘pet’ embodying feline traits like purring, nuzzling, and playful antics, often seeking the Domme’s affection and attention. Pony play is characterized by the ‘pet’ taking on equine mannerisms, such as trotting, wearing tack, and even participating in training exercises or simulated competitions under the Domme’s supervision.

The appeal of pet play within a femdom dynamic is multifaceted. For many, it serves as a form of escapism, allowing individuals to temporarily shed their human identities and immerse themselves in the simplicity and freedom of animalistic behavior. This can be particularly liberating and provide a respite from the complexities of daily life.

Moreover, pet play offers a unique avenue for exploring power dynamics. The roles inherently involve a clear hierarchy, with the Domme exercising control and the pet submitting, which can be deeply fulfilling for those who derive satisfaction from such exchanges. This power play can also lead to a profound sense of trust and intimacy between partners, as the ‘pet’ relies on the Domme for care and guidance, and the Domme, in turn, nurtures and protects the pet.

In essence, pet play within femdom is not merely about mimicry of animal behavior; it is a sophisticated interplay of power, trust, and emotional connection, providing a rich and rewarding experience for those who engage in it.

How Does Pet Play Work?

Pet play, a unique and multifaceted aspect of Femdom, involves one partner embodying the role of a pet, such as a dog or cat, while the Domme assumes the role of the pet owner or trainer. The mechanics of pet play encompass various elements, including the use of specialized gear and the adoption of specific behaviors by the ‘pet.’ Essential items like collars, leashes, tails, and pet-specific attire help enhance the authenticity of the experience, allowing participants to fully immerse themselves in their roles.

The ‘pet’ in pet play is expected to perform behaviors that align with their chosen animal persona. This might include barking, crawling, playing fetch, or even performing tricks. The Domme, on the other hand, takes on the responsibility of guiding and controlling the ‘pet,’ using commands and rewards to encourage desired behaviors. This dynamic can include the use of non-verbal cues, body language, and vocal instructions to maintain the role-play’s continuity.

Setting boundaries is a crucial aspect of pet play. The Domme must ensure that all activities are consensual and that both parties feel comfortable and safe. Clear communication before the session is essential to establish limits and discuss any potential triggers or concerns. During the session, ongoing communication, either verbal or through established cues, helps to ensure that both partners remain within their comfort zones. Following the session, a debriefing conversation allows for reflection and feedback, helping both parties to improve future experiences.

Safety is paramount in pet play. The Domme must remain vigilant and attentive to the ‘pet’s’ physical and emotional well-being. This includes monitoring for any signs of distress, fatigue, or discomfort. Regular check-ins can help to mitigate any issues that may arise, ensuring that the play remains a positive and enjoyable experience for both parties.

In summary, the success of pet play within Femdom relies heavily on mutual respect, clear communication, and adherence to established boundaries. By prioritizing consent and safety, participants can engage in a fulfilling and consensual experience that strengthens their dynamic and enhances their connection.

How to Create a Pet Play Scene

Creating a successful pet play scene necessitates thorough preparation and a deep understanding of both partners’ desires and boundaries. The journey begins with an open dialogue where negotiation and consent are paramount. Both the Dominant (Domme) and the submissive (pet) should clearly express their interests, limits, and any hard or soft boundaries. This conversation ensures that both participants are on the same page and fosters a trustful environment, which is crucial for a fulfilling experience.

Selecting the right gear is the next step in setting up a pet play scene. The choice of equipment can significantly enhance the immersion and enjoyment of the scene. Common items include collars, leashes, tails, ears, and even cages, each catering to different aspects of the role-play. Beginners may start with basic accessories, gradually incorporating more elaborate items as they become more comfortable. Advanced practitioners might explore custom-made gear to tailor the experience to their specific preferences.

Setting the mood and environment is equally important. The ambiance should reflect the desired dynamic and fantasy. This could involve transforming a room with props and decorations reminiscent of a pet’s habitat, such as adding soft blankets, pet bowls, or even using sound effects like purring or barking. Lighting and music can also be adjusted to create a specific atmosphere, whether it’s playful, nurturing, or strict.

Planning activities is another crucial element. Activities should be enjoyable for both the pet and the Domme, fostering a sense of engagement and fulfillment. This could include obedience training, pet tricks, grooming sessions, or simply spending time together in a manner that reinforces the pet’s role. It’s important to strike a balance between structure and spontaneity to keep the scene dynamic and enjoyable.

Aftercare is an essential component to ensure both participants feel valued and secure post-scene. This might involve cuddling, verbal reassurance, or attending to any physical needs, such as water or a snack. Aftercare helps in transitioning back to everyday roles, reinforcing the bond and trust between partners. For advanced practitioners, aftercare might also include a debriefing session to discuss what worked well and what could be improved for future scenes.

The Emotional Aspects of Pet Play

Pet play within Femdom dynamics often elicits a wide array of emotions and psychological responses from both participants. For the submissive, or “pet,” emotions such as devotion, loyalty, and a profound sense of belonging are commonly experienced. The act of assuming an animal’s role can simplify complex human emotions, allowing the pet to express affection and submission in a more primal, unguarded way. This can create a safe space for the pet to explore their submissive nature, leading to a deeper understanding of themselves and their desires.

For the Domme, pet play can foster feelings of control, protection, and nurturing. The dynamic often enhances the Domme’s sense of authority and responsibility, as they guide and care for their pet. This nurturing aspect can strengthen the emotional bond between the Domme and the pet, building a foundation of trust and mutual respect that transcends the boundaries of the scene.

One of the significant benefits of pet play is its potential to deepen emotional connections. The immersive nature of the experience can lead to heightened levels of intimacy and trust, allowing both parties to connect on a more profound level. Additionally, pet play can serve as a form of therapeutic relief, offering an escape from the stresses of daily life. Participants often find that engaging in pet play helps them manage anxiety and stress, providing a sanctuary where they can fully express themselves without fear of judgment.

Another critical aspect of pet play is the exploration of identity and self-expression. By embodying an animal persona, individuals can explore facets of their personality that may not find expression in their everyday lives. This exploration can be both liberating and enlightening, contributing to personal growth and self-awareness.

Aftercare and emotional check-ins are crucial components of pet play. Following a session, both the Domme and the pet should engage in aftercare to process the experience and address any emotional or physical needs. Emotional check-ins help maintain a healthy relationship dynamic, ensuring that both parties feel supported and understood. This practice reinforces the trust and emotional connection that is vital for a fulfilling and sustainable Femdom relationship.

Article MissBonnie 2024

Prostrate Milking

Reposted from ReginaMirus blog cira 2008

Per special request, for Mistress Cruella. I promised I’d do this, now I’m delivering! 

I don’t profess to be the guru of p-spot stimulation, but I’d like to think that I’ve been pretty successful with it, so here’s what it is that I do.

Key elements of a successful prostate massage:

1.He absolutely MUST BE relaxed. If he’s wired, anxious about anything (like performance), or he’s just fearful it’s gonna hurt, then it’s just not going to work.

2.If he’s completely brand new to anal, it’s usually a good idea to let him work on getting the anus open with a smallish butt plug and plenty of lube, on his own time. That way, he can feel the trajectory, know what it feels like when it slides in, etc. And working on his own, at his own pace, he’ll have the confidence when the time comes that he can endure that little bit of pain it takes to open him up (if there is any, at all). Better yet, have him practice wearing it, and have it in when you’re ready to start.

3.I’d also highly recommend before any anal play to administer an enema, or have him do one himself and evacuate prior to the session. There’s nothing worse then sticking a finger or two in there and coming back with a “door prize” . For this, I like to use a “dry” enema, by inserting about 4 tbsp of lube in the anus, wait about 20 min or until the urge hits him, then let him evacuate. All clean, no fuss, no muss, and no nasty surprises .

The best position for him for p-spot massage I think is on all fours, ass up, shoulders down. I may also give him a pillow or two to tuck in under his tummy, so he feels a little more comfortable.

I like to talk to him throughout the entire process, but especially while I’m first poking and prodding around down there. I usually tell him what I’m going to do, and then start introducing my finger in the area. Lube at this point is an absolute MUST, and the more lube, the better. I read somewhere that with all anal play, just when you get to the point that you think you’re using too much lube, that’s the point where you ALMOST have enough .


Gently slide past the outer ring, and feel for the inner ring, which is the sensitive part that usually makes them uncomfortable. If he gets to that point, let him know you’re backing out, slowly back out, then try again, or just stop moving until he gathers his bearings and feels ok again (and he will). Once you are past the inner ring, you’re going to feel downwards for a small little organ about the diameter of a walnut. If you have him on all fours, it’s going to be directly past the inner ring and straight down. It’s sits directly on the other side of the anal cavity, but you can definitely feel the edges of this delightful little organ through the anal wall.

And this is the funny part. Once you start applying pressure, he’s going to feel the overwhelming urge to pee. And it happens every time, like clockwork. That’s because you’re applying direct pressure on the prostate, which presses into the bladder. I let them make the attempt to pee, but it’s usually pretty fruitless .

At this point, it’s best to take your time and literally feel out your man and that amazing little internal button of his. Some guys like a circular motion all around the perimeter, some like pressure more on one side than the other, some like firm pressure right in the middle. It usually takes a little more time (I’ve found it usually takes about 10 min or so), but eventually he’s going to get AMAZINGLY turn on, and that wonderful clear fluid will start to drip, then eventually start running like a faucet. The key here is his reaction. Find that magical little spot that drives him wild and work the living fuck out of it. Keep checking his cock, comment on his “flow” from time to time (and how much of a mess he’s making of himself!). The important key here is take your time. You can manipulate him to cum at this point without touching his penis, or you can jerk him off with the other hand to give him a fairly overwhelming orgasm with ejaculation. Or play a delightful little game of tease and denial by edging and tormenting him for as long as you desire. Either way, I can assure you that a good time will definitely be had by all .


MissBonnie Comment:
Quote:
I don’t profess to be the guru of p-spot stimulation
I don’t know, this reads pretty ‘spot’ on to me Thanks again for sharing.

for the dry enema for any one wanting to try it …I use a medical syringe (no needle of course ) less messy I can draw it straight from the bottle of lube. I use about two tablespoons which is 10 cc’s on the syringe measure so Regina’s way would be 20 cc’s (so you may need to load the syringe twice as most go to 10cc). ‘The ‘movement’ will be produced in a compact body, rather than in the more copious liquid form produced by a wet enema; and since no water is used, none will be retained higher up in the colon, to be expelled at a later, and possibly inconvenient, time I’m with Regina “door prize” not good.

Orginal Article ReginaMirus further addition MissBonnie txt and img CollarNcuffs.com©

related:

P spot milking

Orgasm Denial

Erotic sexual denial, also known as orgasm denial, is a sexual practice in which a person is kept in the plateau phase of sexual arousal for an extended length of time without being allowed to orgasm. This is sometimes practiced in association with BDSM, and can be thought of as a more extreme version of orgasm control, which ends in climax. The subject may either be allowed an orgasm at the end (in which case, the orgasm is generally much stronger than normal) or denied one. An alternative form of erotic sexual denial is the total denial of all genital stimulation. To ensure a total denial of stimulation a couple may use a chastity device that physically prevents touch and/or full erection.

Short-term denial practices Tease and denial

Tease and denial describes a situation where a person’s genitals are stimulated until he/she is close to the point at which orgasm would normally be inevitable. At that point, direct stimulation of the genitals is reduced or stopped, so as to keep the recipient on the very brink or “edge” of orgasm (as with orgasm control) but without the promise of orgasm at the end. If orgasm still occurs after removal of stimulation, it typically brings less pleasure than usual, and is considered a “ruined orgasm,” as opposed to being a “denied orgasm,” (sometimes known as “blue balls”). Alternatively (for men), the release of semen during the emission phase of ejaculation might be prevented by some sort of constriction (“blocked orgasm”). Depending on the relationship, subjects might be repeatedly teased to the point of orgasm several times, but without actual orgasm, causing feelings of intense arousal and psychological need.

Tie and tease

To be able to control an orgasm of a partner in such sex games, physical restraints are commonly used. Situation involving bondage are typically called tie and tease and can be thought of as extended tease and denial games. This practice is often an integral part of erotic denial. It is notable that in discussions between BDSM partners, negotiation usually focuses on the activities which may or may not be agreed to, rather than the emotions generated by said activities (unless at an unacceptable level). Tie and tease activities are physically as well as psychologically intense, because the strong feelings of sexual frustration are escalated by the sensation of helplessness induced by bondage.

Non-orgasmic ejaculation

As an alternative technique, it is said to be possible for a man to be trained to ejaculate, but to do so without achieving orgasm. This technique requires practice and discipline on the man’s part. One key to the technique is to remove all stimulation of the penis at the exact moment when an orgasm would otherwise be achieved; the result is a full expulsion of semen but without the concomitant relief. According to websites on the subject, this technique enables a man to be kept in a state of denial indefinitely, yet maintains prostate health more thoroughly than the alternative technique of prostate milking.

Total denial

The practice of total sexual denial is where a person is prevented from enjoying any sexually stimulation by way of touch to the genitals. This may involve the person being made to wear a device such as a chastity belt. Chastity belts or similar locking devices are available for both men and women. The person may or may not be brought to arousal through other means, depending on the situation.

Long term denial

Frequency of masturbation is determined by many factors, e.g., one’s resistance to sexual tension, hormone levels influencing sexual arousal, sexual habits, peer influences, health and one’s attitude to masturbation formed by culture. Medical causes have also been associated with masturbation.

Different studies have found that masturbation is frequent in humans. Alfred Kinsey’s studies have shown that 92% of men and 62% of women have masturbated during their lifespan. Similar results have been found in British national probability survey. It was found that 95% of men and 71% of women masturbated at some point in their lives. 73% of men and 37% of women reported masturbating in the four weeks before their interview, while 53% of men and 18% of women reported masturbating in previous seven days

It is widely believed that abstaining from orgasm via masturbation or sexual activities will induce a sleeping orgasm. However the frequency of one’s nocturnal emissions has not been conclusively linked to frequency of masturbation. Widely-known sex researcher Alfred Kinsey found “There may be some correlation between the frequencies of masturbation and the frequencies of nocturnal dreams. In general the males who have the highest frequencies of nocturnal emissions may have somewhat lower rates of masturbation. Some of these males credit the frequent emissions to the fact that they do not masturbate; but it is just as likely that the reverse relationship is true, namely, that they do not masturbate because they have frequent emissions.”For women the correlation is also short of conclusive; “According to Kinsey’s findings, women who suddenly lost the opportunity for several coital orgasms per week had only a few more orgasms in their sleep per year.”

Subjects can be kept in denial indefinitely (periods around 2 to 4 weeks each time are often quoted as being safe subject to proper skincare and regular checking). Many, however, suggest that this is very subjective, and often informally suggest a shorter period such as 3 days or a week between release instead — especially when starting.

Beyond that, the long term consequences for denial are unclear, although there are negative effects implied by a recent Australian study which found that frequent masturbation may help prevent prostate cancer in men.

Most sources seem to agree that the body will spontaneously reabsorb sperm, but that the prostate fluids should be removed fully and regularly, if not through orgasm then via internal prostatic massage (known as “prostatic milking”) to reduce the risk of prostate cancer and inflammation, muscular atrophy, (orgasm involves the prostate muscles) or tissue damage to the prostate. It is also said that if erection is inhibited for long periods the skin of the penis becomes less elastic which may cause pain or other difficulty in the future.

Normally, during sexual arousal, ejaculatory fluid accumulates in the male accessory sex glands – the seminal vesicles, the prostate, and the bulbourethral glands (or Cowper’s gland) – backing up behind valves in the ejaculatory ducts. When fluid pressure reaches a high enough threshold, the valves open and the urethral bulb fills, triggering the ejaculatory reflex and muscular contractions of orgasm, which empties the glands.

Without orgasm, prostate milking may be used to help flush out the buildup of toxins which accumulate within the prostate gland. This can be done by allowing ejaculation without orgasm. As most men need penile stimulation to reach the latter, this milking can be done without risk of orgasm.

Ruined orgasm

A ruined orgasm is a technique usually used by a woman (the stimulator) who is dominating a man (the stimulated) during the sexual practice of orgasm denial. The object of orgasm denial is to deny the male an orgasm over a long period of time or to allow him to orgasm but make it unsatisfactory, awkward or even painful to experience therefore asserting the dominant position of the female in the sexual relationship.

This technique allows the physical release of sexual climax while denying or minimizing the satisfaction and pleasure associated with orgasm. With men, the man is stimulated to the moment that ejaculation is inevitable. Stimulation is then stopped by breaking all physical contact with the genitals the moment orgasm begins (i.e. past the “edge”). Alternatively, the stimulator may bring up decidedly non-erotic or nonsexual topics during the orgasm, inflicting non-erotic pain, or stimulating the submissive with an unpleasant smell.

Another technique is to interfere with the ejaculation by some sort of constriction. Ruined orgasms expanded to include such methods as Thumbing, Palming, Dictating, Thwacking and several more unpleasant ways for an ejaculation to be disrupted or “ruined”. Many of these methods are merely disruptive physical actions that come after psychological or emotional trickery has taken place on the part of the dominant female. Deception can play a key role in the effectiveness of a ruined orgasm. When performed on a man, this practice allows the release of seminal fluid and physical sexual release, but keeps the man in a state of arousal because the orgasm is never psychologically “actualized”. Because stimulation is not continued through the orgasm, that man is left still in a state of want, which allows continued stimulation after a very brief period, unlike after the actualized or completed orgasm which may require a considerably longer refractory period.

Erotic denial as a form of control

Erotic sexual denial, in various forms, is sometimes associated with creating a state of sexual need leading to a more pliable or agreeable outlook by the denied party.

Orgasm denial practices can allow dominant males and females to exercise control and training over a highly intimate and psychologically significant part of their partners’ lives. This can extend to tolerance of increased stimulation, and training both to hold back orgasm, or to orgasm on command. This technique gives the dominant partner enjoyable feelings of control and power.

Orgasm denial as a means of control is widely practiced activity within erotic feminization. The dominant will often deny the sissy (the submissive male) sexual release in order to maintain a heightened state or sexual arousal, or as a means to further emasculate and humiliate the submissive.

article MissBonnie©

Genitorture

CBT: Cock and ball torture (CBT) or some times called genitorture

Cock and ball torture (CBT) or some times called genitorture is a sexual activity involving torture of the male genitals. This may involve directly painful activities, such as wax play, genital spanking, squeezing, ball busting, genital flogging, genital bondage, urethral play, electrical play, tickle torture, or even kicking. It may equally consist of the use of cock harnesses, testicle cuffs, parachutes, prolonged stimulation (teasing), metal cages, cock rings, English cages, not necessarily leading to orgasm. Erotic electrostimulation may be used in CBT. The use of ball bags, ball stretchers, various kinds of chastity devices and the humbler can also be regarded as forms of CBT.

A ball lock may be used for prolonged entrapment, providing an interesting predicament associated with not knowing when padlock will be unfastened, releasing the testicles.

The recipient of said activity receives emotional pleasure via pleasing another. There is also a high level of excitement associated with another focusing so much careful attention on that particularly intimate part of one’s anatomy. There may also be social associations regarding controlling said part of the body.

The one enacting the activity benefits by enjoying providing such pleasure to the recipient and having that control. Masochists derive pleasure strictly from the level of pain that torture of their genitals provides them. Sadists also derive pleasure not from the recipient’s enjoyment of the practice but rather from the pain they cause the recipient to experience.

Genitorture 20 way to torture a penis

I’m always asked by new emerging Dominas on ways to play with CBT or ideas that I’d willing to share I adore CBT and so does MissBitch. I thought putting our evil dominant heads together we might be able to come up with a few basics. All of these should be able to be done with no damage to the penis or testicles.

These are some of the techniques that we use

A Penis Puppet

penis puppet

One of my personal favorite forms of cock and ball bondage is what we call a “Penis Puppet”. To do this, you will need about a 3 ft length of cotton rope or string.

1. Wrap the rope around both his cock and his balls, tying it once in a simple overhand knot beneath his balls, keeping an equal length of rope on both sides.

2. Bring the rope back up around his balls, typing it on top of the testicles.

3. Wrap the rope up around the base of his cock, tying it on the upper side, then around his cock again, tying it on the underside.

4. You essentially repeat step # 3, wrapping it and tying it, back and forth around his cock, moving a bit higher each time until the last knot is just under the head of his cock.

You should have some rope left over and can use it to tug his cock back and forth and make it “dance”. Or, you can take the end of the lacing an tie it to the chain between nipple clamps or whatever else might be handy to attach it to.

One further idea on this one would be to tie a length of rope around the slave’s waist and then pull the rope from the puppet up between his legs, between his buttocks, and then tying it off to the rope at his waist.

Clothes pins, clothes pins, clothes pins:

pegged or clipped penis

You would be amazed at how many of these little buggers you can get on a penis and a set of testis. One thing to note is that the less skin you capture within the clothespins, the more painful it is going to be. Larger amounts of skin in the clamps will be, in turn, less painful. Also, clothespins hurt much worse coming off than they do going on, and the longer you leave them on, the more severe the pain will be when you take them off. The first few times you ‘pin’ a particular slave, you may want to limit the time he wears them to 10 minutes to start, then adjust your time from there. If you man happens to be uncut, you can also amuse yourself by pulling the foreskin up over the head of his cock and then clothes pinning it together. 🙂

Make a ball separator with rope:

tied scrotum
  • 1. Take a length of soft cotton rope and, grasping one of his balls, wrap the rope several times around it the skin, forcing the actual testicle downward.
  • 2. Repeat step #1 on the remaining testicle.
  • 3. Wrap the rope around both testicles, at the very top of the sac and tie it off.
  • 4. Apply spearmint or peppermint oil to the penis or scrotum. Cinnamon oil can also be used, but be aware that it tends to be pretty hot. Ben gay and Icy Hot are another alternative, but they can also be rather severe, so try diluting them with a bit of lotion

before you apply it to the skin.

Rattan rascals:

Take three narrow, flexible rods. Short, rattan canes work particularly well. Center one of the rods just under the scrotum, the second above them, and the third on top of and at the very base of the penis. Secure the ends of all three rods together with rubber bands.

Wax:

Hot wax can also be a fun way to play. Be sure when you buy your candles that they are made of plain, cheap, paraffin wax. Avoid beeswax at all costs! (Beeswax heats to temperatures in excess of 300 degrees and can cause some pretty severe burns!) You can control the heat of the wax by the distance you hold the candle away from the flesh. Scents and colors can also add to the heat of the melted wax, so be sure to test the temperature on yourself before applying scented or colored wax to your slave. If you are feeling really brave, you can also buy bulk paraffin wax (available at most grocery stores). Melt the wax in a crock pot, or by placing chunks of it in a glass jar and then placing it in a painful of water on the stove and heat it slowly. MAKE SURE THE WAX HAS COOLED BEFORE APPLYING IT. Test it on your own skin. One idea to do with melted bulk wax is to ‘paint’ the wax on his cock, using a soft, clean paintbrush.

Ice Escapades:

Ice can be just as effective as hot wax. Rub it all over his cock and balls. Place an ice pack on it for several minutes.

Still need more ideas

Try a combination of #6 and #7. First applying heat, then cold, and then heat again, and so on.

A Penis Press :

What you will need:

  • A drill
  • Two pieces of clear lexan glass (bullet proof glass, similar to plexi glass, but much less likely to splinter.) about 1/4“ thick and cut to 12” x 8“.
  • Two pairs of thumb cuffs.
  • Four bolts.

ok now lets put it together:

  • a. Drill a hole, midway down the “short side” of each side of one of the pieces of Lexan. Attach a thumb cuff through each of these two holes.
  • b. Align the Lexan sheets and drill a hole into all four corners, as you see in the picture diagram. Insert bolts through these holes

. Part 2. Putting it to use:

  • Attach his thumbs to the thumb cuffs, so that he is supporting the Lexan. Place his (preferably flaccid) penis between the two sheets of glass and tighten down the bolts.Not only does it make an interesting sight (the Lexan glass is clear, and you would be amazed at how much you can flatten a man’s penis!!!) but it also makes a handy tray on which to place your drink, an ashtray, or whatever toys you are going to use to torture his balls.

Making do:

When I (MissBitch) first moved to Melbourne , I didn’t have room in my apartment for any big toys such as a St. Andrews cross so, here is what I did to provide a similar effect with an added bonus for cbt that a standard cross does not have: In a large walk in closet, I had four eyebolts attached to one of the walls.. two up high and two down low, to attach wrists and ankles to. In addition, there was a 5th eyebolt, centered, on the floor, between the two lower eyebolts.

The idea is to bind the submissive, spread eagle, on the wall, then, for instance, use the ball separating method shown above (#3) and slip an additional rope around the bondage and then tie it to the eyebolt on the floor. A parachute also worked nicely for this, just run a length of rope through the O ring on the parachute and then down through the eyebolt in the floor. The effect is similar to adding weights or “ball stretching”. 

Stocking bind:

Bind your slave’s balls with rope or maybe a stocking… either wrap it several times, or pull on the rope so that his testicles are forced down to the bottom of the sac and are taut, then take a wooden spoon and begin lightly tap-tap-tapping on them. You don’t have to tap very hard, either. Soon the tapping will move beyond being just a slight annoyance to gradually become rather painful.

Rub a dub scrub:

Scrub it with a toothbrush, or other brushed brush. Test on the inner side of your wrist first after all you do want him to some skin left and some bristles can be nasty.

Titanic:

Insert a cube of ice into the end of a condom, then put the condom on his cock.

Fancy fingers:

Scrape the surface of his cock with your fingernails. The erect penis is far more sensitive than a flacid one, so this, like many forms of cbt, are best done when the cock is erect. The head of the cock is a particularly sensitive area for this sort of play. Squeeze his balls firmly and twist the sac in your hand.

Slap and Tickle:

Slap the sides of his “naughty little cock” back and forth with your hand. NOTE: You should avoid slapping or whipping the underside of his cock to avoid any potential damage to the urethra.

Winter wonder:

For some winter fun, you can make a funnel out of some stiff cardboard around his cock and balls. Wrap a rubber band around the base, or tape it together, then fill the funnel with snow!

Water weights:

Fill a couple of 20 oz soda bottles with water. Wrap his balls tightly with rope (or just use a parachute), then tie the bottles to the rope. You can also half fill a couple of balloons, tie them together and use these for weights as well.

Bite his cock. 🙂

Hard or soft, also try after hot or cold drinks for added sensations.

Shoe shine:

With his cock erect, take a silk scarf or stocking and wrap it around his cock and “shine” it, kind of like shining a shoe, pulling the scarf quickly back and forth. This produces, from what I understand, a very intense sensation!

Have fun and let your imagination run wild!

Article MissBonnie and MissBitch 2006-2009 © imgs: MissBonnie & MissBitch

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Figging: The Art of Ginger Root Play

The art of ginger root play was written a few years ago by Master Michael aka Propane7@aol.com and appeared on many a BDSM site. Although it primarily aimed at Female submission the information transfers over to male submissives very well. I think it is worth repeating here for whose that have not seen it.

When I first wrote an article on figging some years ago, I received, not surprisingly, a heap of e-mail from lifestylers who had never heard of this. They were most appreciative to have received the information though, and many were anxious to try the technique. I thought that with a new crop (no pun intended) of Doms and subbies entering our community, I would rewrite the article. If you’re already familiar with figging, you may skip to the next informative article on the list. If figging sounds like an old Scottish sport, you’d better stick around and read on.

Figging, anal play (or torture) using ginger root, seems to be an art that is increasingly ignored. Maybe it’s because there isn’t enough information passed on about it or perhaps with the advent of fancy salves, chemicals and potions that can mimic ginger, lifestylers don’t want to take the time needed to prepare for this activity. Either reason precludes a pleasurable and memorable experience. While there is still controversy as to the origins and reasons to figging, it is fairly well agreed upon that it dates back to the Victorian era. Mentions of figging can be found in some Victorian literature. Back in those days, the Victorians were a fairly bawdy, perverted, kinky bunch behind closed doors (ya gotta love them). Caning, a very popular form of punishment, especially for the female miscreant, was elevated to an art form itself.

There is evidence that figging actually had its beginnings when ginger was used in a caning victim’s anus to prevent her from clenching her buttocks during punishment. While I’ll expand on this later, clenching one’s butt while it hosts ginger causes an intense burning sensation. Now why the Victorians didn’t want to see the victim clench her rear is beyond me. I mean, that is one of the best parts and furthermore oh, yeah, figging. Sorry about that. Somehow, the practice was picked up as a technique unto itself in the lifestyle. I have practiced figging for many years and have turned many subs onto it. While it is a fairly easy technique to master, some care is necessary and proper preparation is required.

So, let’s delve into the world of ginger (or Gilligan and Mary Ann). Ginger, in its natural state, is sold as a “hand”. For you non-gourmets, it’s called a hand because it somewhat resembles one. The protuberances from the hand are called, yes Martha, fingers. Unfortunately, many supermarkets now precut the hand into fingers and package them as a convenience. What’s the matter with them! Don’t they realize they are making it difficult for us Doms to torture our subbies butts??!! I mean really sorry again. Stay away from the precut stuff unless you’ve had enough experience to safely play with small fingers. Celeste, no wise cracks here!! Find a place that sells a hand. If the supermarket doesn’t have any, visit any oriental grocery store.Buy the largest hand you can find and scurry it home. Keep the entire hand in a cool dry place until you are ready to use it. The sooner you use it, however, the better the effect unless you age it properly which I’ll get to later. When play time rolls around, I usually like to have my sub bound, face down on the bed over a pillow. No blindfold here. I make it a point of allowing her to watch and hear me prepare the ginger. The anticipation is spectacular especially if she’s never experienced it before. The gyrations generated from the anticipation alone are well worth the experience. Now you are ready to cut a finger of ginger from the hand. Unless the fingers are very long, do not cut the finger off at the joint of the hand. Remove the finger by cutting down into the palm of the hand so that you get a long, uniform width finger. I like to use a finger no smaller than 4 inches. Longer is better. Take a paring knife or vegetable peeler and remove the brown skin. Make sure all the skin is off as well as insuring that all the bumps and knots are cut off and smoothed as well. Try not to remove too much meat underneath, as you want to retain as full a finger as possible. Take your time and don’t rush this step. As you work, rinse it under cold water periodically to help wash away pieces of skin. Ginger is fibrous and sometimes takes a little time to prepare properly.

If you’re into oriental cooking, you’ll love the delicate ginger aroma that is released as you do this step. The smell is a great stimulus for the sub as well. It heralds things to cum (yes, pun intended lol). After you have the skinned root all smooth and nice, you now have to perform the tricky bit. With the paring knife, about two-thirds of the way down the root, carefully carve a concavity around the finger. This will act as a retention device. Similar to a butt plug where the sphincter locks around the tapered portion of the plug, the concavity will do the same thing. Make the ring no more than a half inch wide. Remember; do not taper the finger all the way down to the end. You want full circumference of the finger two-thirds of the way down, a half-inch retention ring and then full circumference continuing down to the end of the finger. Do not carve out too much however, as this will weaken the finger and increase the possibility of breaking it while in the sub. You don’t need a very deep ring for retention.

After you have carefully completed this step, rinse the finger off and dip it in cold water. Make sure the tip of the finger is sufficiently rounded. You can always touch this area up with a knife or peeler. Now it’s ready to insert. Unlike your own finger, you do not use lube with a ginger finger. Lubricant acts as a sealant and prevents the ginger moisture from doing its thing. Instead, use the cold water to keep the finger wet. Slowly insert the finger into the sub’s anus. DON’T RUSH HERE. TAKE YOUR TIME. Wet ginger is slick enough to slide in with care. When the anus finally opens and accepts the ginger, slide it in up the ring and let the sub close around it. The beauty of ginger is that it takes a little while for the effect to take place. Once it begins, it builds steadily. While you are waiting for the fun to begin, go wash off your hands. You don’t want to touch your eyes or your sub’s eyes by accident with ginger on your hands. Now sit down in a comfy chair and enjoy the show. Most submissives will become rather vocal as the ginger works its magic.

Depending on the fortitude of the sub, the potency of the ginger and how much of a mindfuck you prologue with, the reactions will vary. A few subs have reported that the ginger doesn’t do any more than, let’s say, Ben Gay, however, they are far and few between. Most subs report that the effects were far greater than they imagined. Different strokes for different folks. To increase the effect, pinch your sub’s buttocks together and hold them for a minute or two. This causes a big boost in burning sensation and if done every so often, keeps your sub awake. The effects of the ginger will last approximately twenty minutes or so, after which, the effects diminish rapidly. The nice thing about ginger is no matter how intense the effect on the sub, you won’t hurt her/him and it is short-lived. Once the sensation ceases, remove the ginger and go about your other session business. Ginger also has a property that puts it far ahead of any ginger wannabe substance. The juice of the root has the ability to cause incredible horniness. I have had subs begin to sob, begging to have something inserted into their pussies and to have orgasm. The reaction is tenfold if the ginger juice comes in contact with the clit. Cut a small slice of ginger, making sure it has one flat side. Place this side directly onto the clit and hold it there. Depending on anatomy, some women will be able to retain the slice on their clit without assistance. Apply ginger to the clit while the ginger butt plug is in place and watch the fun. I have experienced some of the most stunning results with subbies using this technique. I don’t have a perfect scientific explanation as to why ginger causes such an aphrodisiac effect but suffice to say it works.

Being an equal opportunity lifestyler, I don’t want to forget the male sub and his Domme. Ginger is dynamite for CBT. Cut a julienne slice of peeled ginger. It should be approximately 1/8-1/4 inch wide by at least 1 inch long. Make sure it is smooth and that the edges are rounded. Use the paring knife “gingerly” for this task. Make sure your sub is tied down face up. Dip the ginger in water and slowly insert it into the urethra of the cock. Make sure you leave enough sticking out to be able to remove it easily. The effect of ginger in a cock is almost immediate and the sub will react quite vigorously. The burning is incredibly intense. If it become too much for your sub, remove the ginger and give him a minute’s rest. When the ginger is removed, the burning sensation drops dramatically. You can place it back down the cock to resume the fun. Eventually, the sensation will wear off but not until the sub is spent.

Now for a little technique that will “turbocharge” your ginger. Using your ginger soon after you buy it will assure potency. Storing ginger, unprotected, for long periods of time will rob it of its “zip”. However, if you have any ginger fingers left after playtime, place it in a sealed, plastic bag and place it in the veggie bin in the refrigerator. Now, like the aging of fine wine, forget about it for a while. After a few days, check the ginger. If things are going well, the inside of the bag should have moisture on it. If a little mold has formed on the ginger, it’s time for play. If not, put it back in the bin for another day or two and check it daily until mold forms. The mold is harmless and does not penetrate the tough, fibrous skin of the root. Peel and prepare the ginger as before and play as usual. But look out! The juice of the ginger has increased dramatically in potency. If you think you had a good time when the ginger was new, wait till you play now! Any unused ginger should be discarded at this point.

Two words of caution. First, if your sub is allergic to ginger (I haven’t run into one yet), don’t play with it. You can ignite an allergic skin reaction. Not good. Second, if by some chance the ginger breaks off in your sub’s butt and you can’t retrieve it, don’t bother with emergency rooms. They will only cause you a hassle. Instead, just throw your sub into the wok with some chicken and enjoy.

This article was written by Master Michael aka Propane7@aol.com © Img MissBonnie

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Fire play in Femdom scenes

Many people tend to forget the basics about fire safety when they do fireplay, probably because of the illusion of control we Doms have while we scene…I don’t know about the rest of you out there, but when I am scening, I’m so into control, that I believe nothing can go wrong, ’cause I’m godlike…and nothing is farther from the truth, unfortunately. I’ve known about at least 2 fires that started ’cause of a fireplay scene gone wrong, and about one sub who got 3rd degree burns ’cause of a dumb mistake. (and no, none of those was with me involved 🙂

So…for starters, we need to remember that we have to have the basic firefighting equipment ready…a fire extinguisher or, at the very least, a good couple of buckets of water; sand is also very good at firefighting.

We should also remember not to have any flammable objects near the area were we are playing with fire…be smart enough and don’t try to do fireplay with the subbie tied to the bed, k? Unless you want barbecued subbie, that is 🙂 Mosquito netting is also a hazard in this kind of scene…it burns fast, sticks to other objects (including skin) and it’s very hard to put out the fire on it once it’s started.

Also, make sure that if you are gonna tie your subbie down, you have a pair of surgical scissors (the kind with blunt tips but sharp as knifes) handy, to cut her loose in case you need to…subs are worth more than rope, no matter how expensive the rope is 🙂 I don’t recommend locks being mixed with fireplay, it takes a long time to get the damn things off when you are in a hurry; so, if you like bondage mixed with your fireplay, please only use ropes and keep the scissors handy!

Now, one more thing people tend to forget when doing fireplay….hair doesn’t only smell bad when it burns…it burns FAST as hell…so…be careful with the hair…pull it up and out of the way, cover it with a wet bathcap or something like that, and make sure that whatever you use to start up your fire doesn’t get too near her neck.

Another important thing some of us forget is about the kind of chemicals we use to make the fire. I found once a sub who’s skin was sensitive to something in the alcohol I normally use for fireplay, and she had an ugly rash for a week :/ So, be careful with the stuff you use for your fireplay, make sure you know what allergies your sub has before applying any chemical to her skin that has the potential of triggering an allergy.

The important part of fireplay safety is to always remember that fire IS a very dangerous foe, and if it gets out of your control, it’s better to call the fire station and have to explain what happened than dieing in a charcoal house…this is specially important in places where houses are mostly made out of wood, like in the US…houses burn down fast

Caution: May I please add that the bottom shouldn’t be wearing any body lotions either as they are somewhat flammable and/or cause the skin to get a lot hotter than other non-lotioned areas. Also,deep arch’s in the lower back, above the sacrum, pool liquids (which any other time is quite nice) but in the case of fire play could become a safety issue if allowed to become a reservoir of the liquid used to ignite regards MissBonnie.

This article is only to be used for suggestions and your own resource, use at your own risk.

MISTRESS AS TEMPTING AS SIN http://iamdesire.multiply.com/ (now closed) text MistressAsTemptingAsSin AKA Iamdesire © Collarncuffs.com

Electro play

Let’s start with the most basic question; why would anyone WANT to have electricity applied to their body? The answers to that question fall into two areas; psychological and physical. Electric play is often practiced in BDSM and Femdom activities.

The psychological reaction to the thought of being part of an electrical circuit is usually quite strong. We are taught as toddlers not to play with electricity, that it is dangerous, and that it can hurt or even kill us. Most of us have at one time or another received an accidental electric shock, and since it usually involves a strong dose of “house current”, it tends to be unpleasant enough to re-enforce these warnings! Of course, the mention of the term “electric shock torture” brings to mind a variety of fascinating images ranging from Gestapo or KGB interrogation chambers to field interrogations using the ringer generator on a field telephone connected to someone’s “private parts”, or possibly the Sheriff or Troopers with their cattle prods. The number and variety of scenes that can be built around various electrical devices is almost limitless. I’ll discuss some of my own favorites later.

Physically, electricity can produce a complex variety of sensations, and every Sub who has thought about the subject has their own idea of what it “should” feel like. If your subject enjoys the psychological trip, setting up a scene with all of the trappings of a torture session and applying mild stimulation while letting the subject’s mind do the rest can result in a very intense experience. Of course, if you and your subject are into more intense pain, electricity can provide more pain than most subs can tolerate, without leaving marks, scars, or (if done carefully) damage. Aside from the pain and fear aspects, direct mild electrical stimulation of the genitiles can, under some circumstances, produce intensely sensual sensations, even to the point of orgasm.

Before we get into specific electropleasure techniques, we should start with a couple of basic safety rules; NEVER set up contacts such that a current path can be completed through the heart or brain! The safest way to be certain of this is to avoid any contact above the lowest set of ribs. It IS possible to work safely on the back, shoulders, neck and arms and I make some references to it later, but unless you are certain of your equipment, your knowledge and skill, and your subject’s health, keep the contacts below the lowest set of ribs. Don’t tie your subject too tightly, allow some room for muscle contractions. It is possible to do some significant damage if you apply a strong shock to a tightly-tied limb. Also, make certain that your subject is bound or positioned such that a sudden movement won’t cause a fall, impact against a solid or sharp object, or other unintended injury.

Make certain that your electrodes make good contact. Poor contact will often cause burns. Electrical burns tend to be deep and slow to heal. They also tend to have more damage beneath the surface than is immediately obvious.

I strongly suggest that when you try a new setup, you test it on yourself to the extent possible. This will give you some insight as to what the sensations are and what constitutes a tolerable level of current.

This leads to a WARNING: NEVER EXPERIMENT WITH ELECTRICITY ON YOURSELF UNLESS YOU HAVE SOMEONE PRESENT WHO KNOWS HOW (AND WHEN) TO SHUT OFF THE CURRENT!

Know your equipment!

Always have a safeword AND a signal which can be used if your sub can’t speak. Make sure that you are always alert to it.

Finally, LEARN CPR!!!!!!! It could make the difference between a bad fright and a fatality (with resulting homicide charge). Remember, however, that CPR is successful in only about 1 cardiac arrest in 3! If this scares you, GOOD! Playing with electricity (like mountain climbing, flying, scuba diving, and numerous other hobbies) is not inherently dangerous, but it is terribly unforgiving of carelessness!

TYPES OF ELECTRICITY

People who play with electricity have been arguing the safety risks of DC vs. AC for a long time, and I won’t get caught up in the arguement here. I am of the “AC is safer” school, and generally avoid DC for play. AC, particularly frequencies in the range 1,000 cycles per second to 10,000 cycles per second (1 KHz to 10 KHz), is less dangerous and, in my opinion, provides more interesting sensations. As for current, it doesn’t take much. Five to fifteen milliamperes (.015 amp, or about 1/1000th of the current that a normal wall-outlet will provide before blowing fuses!) is generally as much as most people want to feel.

Before we get into equipment for applying electric current, let’s look at the safest electrical appliance in the S&M world. Instead of continuous current, This device makes use of STATIC ELECTRICITY. We have all walked across the wool rug and touched a light switch or appliance, and felt the spark jump out to meet our hand. The voltages involved here are extremely high (frequently on the order of millions of volts!). However, length of time that it lasts is so short and current so low that the total amount of electricity flowing is minuscule. Think of it as popping a small balloon. You have a little bit of air under a lot of pressure. When it is suddenly released, the pressure causes a loud bang, but does little else. The result of this is a strong, biting shock that causes no damage and isn’t dangerous, but really gets your attention. Since making your sub shuffle around on a wool rug all day is somewhat boring, we have a device called a VIOLET WAND.

THE VIOLET WAND

This gadget uses a high-frequency circuit similar to a Tesla coil to build up a static charge in a gas-filled glass tube. If you hold the tube near your sub’s body, Each time the charge builds up enough to jump the gap, a spark jumps from the tube to your sub’s skin. Unlike shuffling across the rug, though, the Wand can spark many times a second. You can adjust the intensity and rate of sparks depending on your purpose. The nature of the body’s response to this type of charge is such that you can use the wand anywhere on the body except for the eyes. One of the best scenes I’ve seen with the wand involved a male sub who had never experienced it before. After the top made it clear that he was dissatisfied with the sub ‘s performance, that it was time for an exceptionally severe punishment, he was tied to a cross spread-eagled in a standing position. naked except for a leather cock and ball harness. He was gagged but not blindfolded. The only light in the room was a small blue nightlight. The Top brought out the Wand and selected a small straight tube. When it was switched on, the nightlight was eclipsed by the purple glow from the tube and a sputtering, crackling sound came from the power unit. With the tube a few inches from a metal wall plate the slave got to watch the bright, blue sparks jump from the tube to the plate for a few moments while the top made some adjustments to the power unit (which comes with simply an on-off switch and a power control, so a couple of knobs and dials were added to make it more sinister). The slave was left alone to contemplate the glowing tube for a few minutes.

When the top returned, the slave was sweating and seemed rather pale in the purple glow. After stroking his erect cock a few times (he was terrified, but loving every second), the top suddenly gripped his cock firmly in one hand and started bringing the wand slowly closer to the bead of cum on the very tip of his cock. When the tip of the wand was about 1/2“ from the tip of his cock, a stream of sparks began to jump the gap. His screams were audible around the gag as he began to writhe and strain against his bonds. The wand was pulled away before he could realize that it didn’t hurt nearly as much as he thought it did. He spent the next few minutes receiving brief zaps to random places, especially on the tip of his cock, the spot right at the base of the glans, his nipples, navel, and ear lobes. Each zap brought a renewed writhing, although the screams had dropped off to whimpers, and his cock was hard and his breathing heavy.

Finally tired of this game, the top began alternating tongue and wand on the end of his cock. Of course, the wetness from the top’s mouth made the zaps sting more, and the rapid changes between the caressing tongue and the sting of the wand left him not knowing what to expect next. Next, the top gripped the end of the wand tightly in one hand. You might expect this to be uncomfortable, but actually the charge at that point builds up without “motion” in both the wand and the holder’s body. This means that the top could reach out and draw sparks between a fingertip and the slave’s writhing body! Of course, the Top felt the sparks too, but the Top knew what to expect, and a finger is a lot less sensitive than the points on the slave’s body where the sparks were striking! This phase of his “torture” ended by being ungagged and kissed, drawing sparks between probing tongues. The top finished the evening by switching the small tube on the wand for a flat disk about 1” in diameter, which he used to apply a shower of sparks to the sensitive (and recently shaved) area between the back of the slave’s balls and his anus, while sucking him to climax.

CAUTION: Note that at no point did the top insert the tube into any body orifice. Remember that the tube is GLASS! Inserting it into the anus (or vagina, in the case of a female submissive) would be hazardous, and since there is very little sensation when there is no air gap between the tube and the body, it really isn’t worth it. It IS possible to obtain a piece of metal tubing slightly larger than the glass tube and place it over the end of the glass tube. This metal tip can then be inserted as seems appropriate (keeping in mind sharp edges, and all of the other rules that apply when you stick things into places where they weren’t designed to go).

Although this particular exercise involved a male subject, I have also seen the same general techniques on females with similar success. In that case, excellent targets include the clitoris and surrounding area, as well as along the moist inner edges of her cunt lips. One particularly interesting variation involves a piece of plastic pipe, about 3/4“ outside diameter and 3” long, with all edges chamfered and smoothed. Insert the end of the pipe slightly into her cunt, then, using the wand with the metal extension described above, insert it into the tube. Experiment with varying amounts of penetration for both the tubing and the wand. The same technique would work for anal penetration, and would provide a very intense reaction on a male subject if concentrated on his prostate.

By now you’re probably curious as to where to get one of these toys, and why they sell them in the first place. Actually, they were originally sold as “cure-alls” and were the center of many charitans’ “medical” practice. Currently, they are sold mainly as a curiosity. The unit that I have is called the “Master High Frequency Unit”. They are sold through beauty supply houses as a skin stimulator or some such, so that’s one possible source. They are also available from a company called The Stockroom www.stockroom.com

The units that I have came with three different tubes. If you should get one, the best bet is to simply play with it to see what tubes produce the most interesting effect on what body parts, although the above should give you a few ideas. The model that The Stockroom carries is available with an attachment consisting of a metal beaded chain, which can be used as a very interesting electric whip. I haven’t tried it, but it sounds quite neat, and I’d like to hear from someone who has used it.

If you are interested in applying current as opposed to static jolts, the selection of a power supply requires some care. Although I built my first unit back when I was in high school, I strongly advise against the do-it-yourself route unless you are particularly skilled in electronics (in retrospect, I consider myself lucky that none of my early designs ever landed anyone in a hospital or worse!). I’ve seen frequent references to “TENS” (Trancutaneous Electro-Neural Stimulation) units, which is the medical term for a device frequently used by chiropractors and other medical professionals. These are powerful units, and are quite capable of causing serious injury or death. They are also generally sold only to medical practitioners, and are very expensive. They are, however, quite well made and are very safe if properly used. You will sometimes find them for sale in the “Health Equipment” classifieds for under $200.

If you don’t happen to have a chiropractor who will order a TENS unit for you and instruct you in its safe use, I’d suggest buying one of the Electro-Muscle Stimulation (EMS) exercisers that you see advertised in any of the bodybuilding magazines These are less costly (and usually less powerful and elaborate) versions of the TENS units, and are intended to provide the effects of exercise by forcing muscle contractions electrically. I’ll leave the question of whether they help build impressive biceps to others, but as electro-pleasure and electro-torture devices, they are excellent. They provide from 2 to a dozen separate circuits, each with adjustable current. Depending on the unit, you may also be able to vary frequency, waveform, and surge characteristics for each circuit. The units are powered by batteries, which eliminates any worry about a ground loop or component failure placing the full resources of your local power company in contact with a sensitive portion of your partner’s anatomy. Also, the individual circuits are isolated from each other, so you don’t have to worry about current flowing between electrodes of two different circuits and setting up a path that you hadn’t planned on.

The Stockroom also sells a couple of different types of power supplies for the purpose. I’ve also seen a small 2-circuit EMS unit advertised recently on Home Shopping Club and one in the “Damark” bargain catalogue.

Exactly what path you want the current to take through your subject’s body and how you connect the current is dependent on what effect you are looking to obtain. The smaller the electrode, the more strongly the current will be felt as a tingling or stinging at the electrode site. Therefore, with a small electrode, the sensation at the contact point is likely to reach your subject’s tolerance limit before much is felt in the area between the contacts. A large electrode will produce little sensation at the contact point, and more in the area between contacts. Bearing in mind that we NEVER select a current path through the chest or head, let’s take a look at some paths and the types of electrodes suitable for connecting them.

The number of different types of electrodes that you can make or buy is limited only by the kinkyness of your imagination. Remember though that a poor electrode-to-skin contact can cause painful, slow-healing burns. Most people do not consider this enjoyable, so make sure that your electrodes make good contact, and adjust them if your subject complains of burning.

LEG TO LEG

This is a good “first try”. Because of the size and strength of the muscles, legs respond well to electroshock. Initially, the best way to connect to the legs is through ankle cuffs. Make up a “sandwich” consisting of a layer of plastic (i.e. a Baggie), a layer of metal window screen (copper, brass, or aluminum) to which you’ve attached a length of wire (a piece of Aluminum foil will work in a pinch, and a layer of gauze (such as first aid pads). Wet the gauze with a solution of 1 tbsp of salt in 1 qt of warm water. Wrap one around each ankle, and secure them tightly in place using your regular leather ankle restraints or an Ace bandage.

This makes an excellent contact and will provide minimal sensation at the contact point, so your subject can concentrate on the sensation in thigh and calf muscles. Unfortunately, this method doesn’t provide much sensation in the genital area (more sensation in women than men, though).

Of course, this technique would also work on wrist cuffs. You shouldn’t even consider applying current from wrist to wrist since this is a direct path through the heart and lungs. You CAN, however, wrap one cuff around the wrist and the other near the shoulder of the SAME ARM. If your power supply has multiple circuits, you can do this to both arms, provided the circuits are well isolated from each other. If you have a 3-circuit power supply, you can effectively “bind” your subject without ropes by setting up a circuit leg-to-leg and one on each arm, then increasing the current to the point where your subject can no longer move her/his limbs. This takes surprisingly little current, and an otherwise unbound subject struggling and straining to move his/her limbs against invisible bonds can be most erotic both to watch and experience.

It is also interesting to apply current between sections of the body which cannot be wrapped, such as the buttocks, lower back, and stomach. For this purpose, you can either use the conductive rubber electrodes sold for use with TENS or EMS units (they’re made of rubber with a high carbon content, making them conductive) or flat plastic-screen-gauze pads such as described above. These can, of course, be made in whatever shape and size you wish. I’ve also recently tried the anti-static plastic that computer boards come in with good results.

Application of current to the buttocks via large pad electrodes is an interesting sensation, with the tingling often extending into the genitals, and in any case being quite erotic.

If the scene that you are playing includes pain, it is probably best to concentrate the current with small electrodes. Applying enough current across a large area to be more than mildly painful entails a high risk of pulled muscles, torn ligaments, and the like. A short current path between two small electrodes can, on the other hand, produce a concentrated sensation variable from a mild tingling to intense pain at the turn of a knob. You can also concentrate the sensation even further by using one large electrode (on the buttocks or lower back, for example) and a small electrode at the point where you want concentrated pain. Small electrodes can be made by soldering a wire to a coin. For better contact, glue a piece of gauze or towel to the contact side of the coin and wet it with salt water.

Another interesting contact material is the copper tape sold as edging for stained glass. I haven’t had much opportunity to play with it, but it’s available in widths from 3/16“ to 3/8” and is quite conductive.

An interesting variation is connecting one side of a circuit to a large electrode on the lower back and taking a Q-Tip swab, wrapping a couple of turns of copper wire connected to the other side of the circuit around the shaft where it joins the cotton tip. You then can wet the swab with salt water and draw points and lines of tingling or pain on the legs, stomach, back, and genitals. Depending on the current level (this is a good one to try on yourself first) it can feel like a tiny vibrator or like you’re flaying the skin with a sharp knife (but leaving no damage, marks or sensation of cuts behind). This can be especially intense for a subject who is blindfolded and doesn’t know what’s happening – the sensation is quite outside most people’s frame of reference and they have no idea what you’re doing to them.

This is probably a good time to mention clip leads. If you want very concentrated sensation and your subject is into a lot of pain, alligator clips may be just the thing. Attached to the cunt lips (or cock or balls), a very small amount of current will produce exquisite agony. I recommend the smooth jaw clips since they are more comfortable, and allow the subject to concentrate on the sensation of the current. You can also take a clothespin and insert a thumbtack with a wire connected to it into each side of the clip. This produces a very concentrated sensation, and you can even use this on a nipple provided that the two tacks represent two leads of the same circuit, since the current will be flowing only through the nipple itself.

If your subject enjoys anal stimulation, you can take a butt plug of whatever size your subject enjoys (remember, smaller is better since we want to emphasize the current sensations) and wrap it with bare copper wire. You can get different sensations by wrapping different parts of the plug. On a male subject, if you wrap just the top 1/2“ or so, you can usually produce an ejaculation on demand by stimulating the muscles around the prostate gland. This is especially interesting because the resulting ejaculation is quite unsatisfying. It is possible to milk him dry this way while still leaving him horny and begging for an orgasm that just won’t happen. My favorite tools for this purpose resembles a latex finger about 6” long and slightly bent. I have wire-wrapped only the very end, which allow me to probe around to get the reaction I desire. I’ve recently seen a butt plug with electrical contacts already built in advertised in the Stockroom catalogue, but I haven’t had a chance to try one.

CAUTION: Anytime you use a wire as a contact, make the bare part at least twice as long as you need and fold it back on itself so that the cut end is not in contact with the body, and ESPECIALLY is not inserted into a body cavity! The cut end can do serious damage in places where the repair work is also likely to be unpleasant.

Applying current to the genitals is one of the most intense aspects of electrotorture, both psychologically and physically. Depending on the effect that you are trying to achieve, there are a variety of possible connection methods. Let’s consider the female first; As I mentioned above, a Q-tip wet with salt water and connected to one side of a circuit is excellent. You can tease the wet insides of her cunt lips and continue up to the sensitive area around the base of her clit, or even up to the tip of the clit itself. It really doesn’t matter where you connect the other side of the circuit, but it should be a fairly large contact to concentrate the sensation at the Q-Tip.

Many companies sell chrome or stainless steel dildos, which are excellent as a cunt contact. I even have a chrome (metal, not chromed plastic) vibrator, which provides an intense combination of sensations. If you can’t get a metal dildo or vibrator, the same wire-wrapping techniques used on the butt-plug works well. You may also want to try just wire-wrapping the end so that you can probe for the spot that gives the reaction that you want. A circuit connected from a dildo to a butt-plug produces intense sensation in the most sexually-responsive areas. If your power supply is capable of producing a surging current, it can feel almost like being fucked from both ends at once with the electrodes not even moving!

Also, if your subject enjoys more intense pain, a clamp (the chrome ones sold as nipple clamps work well) on each cunt lip can be excruciating (as, of course, can one on her clit with the other side of the circuit on a dildo). Since I mention nipple clamps, I again caution against connecting one side of a circuit to a nipple! One contact on each side of the SAME nipple forming a circuit is safe as long as those contacts are isolated from any other circuits.

A number of people that I know INSERT electrodes into the urethra (Male or Female). This should be done with the greatest of care (if at all). The wire to be inserted should be doubled back and soldered (preferably with lead-free solder) then the solder should be polished smooth. Remember that the slightest scratch inside the urethra is likely to result in an infection and may well require painful (and embarrassing) surgery. If you must try this, I’d recommend trying to obtain uretheral “sounds” (a probe designed for insertion into the urethra).

The male anatomy offers a diverse selection of options for connection to electrical circuits. For the balls, there are several possibilities; Do NOT wrap a wire around your subject’s balls! The dangers of this should be obvious.

You can use the same salt-water and gauze technique as above with whatever type of ball harness best shows off your subject’s equipment. Again, Ace bandage works well to hold the contacts and provides the additional advantage of a pleasant sensation of pressure.

If you can get them, the small adhesive pads used by Paramedics as contacts for electrocardiograms are perfect for the balls. You can set up an interesting sensation by connecting a circuit to one on the bottom of each ball. Shaving the balls first makes this easier, and can be an interesting scene on its own. If you can’t get the EKG electrodes, a penny covered with salt water wetted gauze works real well also.

For electro-masturbation, I prefer a ball contact placed in the space between the balls. Attaching copper tape the center strap of a leather ball-divider works quite well.

Good choices for a second contact for any circuit involving the cock and balls include a butt-plug, ankle cuffs, thigh cuffs, or flat electrodes on the buttocks or lower back. You can also use a metal cock ring of the type that fits behind the balls, but I find that they tend to burn, at least on me, unless the entire area is freshly shaved I’ve also had some good luck with the Parachute type ball-stretcher. Lined with wet gauze and weighted, it makes excellent contact and will handle an excruciating amount of current without burning.

For the cock, a metal (copper is best) cock ring with a wire soldered to it sized to be snug just behind the glans when the cock is erect works well. I heard just recently of someone who is uncut and places the ring such that he can pull the foreskin over it – he says the sensation is terrific. I’ve also seen an interesting unit based on the “7 gates of hell”, which consists of 7 cock rings of decreasing size held together by leather straps. They fit over the cock and become quite snug when the cock is erect. In his case, each side of the circuit is connected to alternating rings. Although none of these make the greatest contact, the amount of current that most men can tolerate through the outer portion of their cocks is well below the point where burning is a problem. . A copper cock ring at the BASE of the cock paired with a butt-plug also makes an excellent combination. If you make up several coin electrodes and glue each one to a strip of Velcro, you can wrap them in place just about anyplace on the cock. A hot-melt glue gun is an excellent tool when making electrodes, since you can also insulate connections with the glue. The LOW TEMP glue gun is also an interesting torture tool by itself. I haven’t tried gluing electrodes in place, but it could be interesting. I find personally that a dime electrode on the top of my cock just at the base of the glans, with the other side of the circuit a large contact on buttocks, thigh, or balls will produce an ejaculation without any other contact fairly quickly.

If you prefer less concentrated sensations, a bare wire laid along the cock lengthwise (see caution above about wire electrodes) and Ace-bandaged in place is excellent. You can use any of the options mentions above for the other side of the circuit, or you can lay one wire along the top and one along the bottom to make a circuit. Most men can take quite a bit of current in this orientation, so some salt water may help to insure a good connection. I should note that in most cases, current applied to any part of the cock will produce an immediate erection, sometimes painfully hard. There is also usually a level of current where ejaculation becomes impossible. I will leave the question of how to best take advantage of this situation to the mind of the reader. I should note that I’ve never had the opportunity to try or observe intercourse when the male is being held “electrically erect”, but the possibilities are interesting to say the least (again, reports of your experiences would be interesting and will be included in subsequent versions of this article).

A reader of a previous version of this document says that he has an Oster massager which has a metal heated surface, and using it as one side of a circuit provides an interesting combination of vibration, heat, and electricity when applied to any number of locations.

Of course, one of the most interesting aspects of electrotorture involves structuring the scene for maximum psychological impact. Consider the difference between slowly increasing the current to the point where the subject reaches their limit (NOTE – ALWAYS HAVE A SAFE-WORD WHEN PLAYING WITH ELECTRICITY!) and suddenly applying current (at the same level that you have previously tested with a slow buildup). In the latter case, the subject experiences a sensation of anticipation much like that of waiting for a whip to strike. Of course, there are any number of ways that you can arrange to have shocks applied at random intervals so that you can be doing something else entirely when the shock comes (for example, oral sex becomes so much more interesting when you know that at any time you may get a painful shock to your genitals). Since the Top doesn’t know exactly when the current is coming, (s)he can’t telegraph it, so the subject is totally unprepared.

Alternatively, you can place the shocks more or less under your subject’s “control”. For example, how long can your subject hold a push-up position before sinking down to the floor and pressing down on a switch? Or a missing-pulse circuit can be used so that your subject remains shock-free only as long as he/she can continue to do push-ups or pull-ups or work the stair exerciser or whatever at a rate of once every x seconds. This is a great way to get your subject in shape while you play!

Carrying this concept a bit further is a particularly nasty idea for your favorite male submissive: Place a reasonably large contact for one side of a circuit at most any point on the body (I personally prefer a butt plug). For the other contact, take an insulated wire, Strip about the last 1/4“ and put a ball of solder on the end to cover the sharp tip. Cover this with a layer of DRY gauze, and insert it into the very tip of a (non-lubricated) condom. Put the condom on your subject. No current will flow because the gauze insulates the electrode from his cock. Explain to the subject that you will let him come whenever he ASKS to. However, the sensation of orgasm will occur along with a significant current flow through his cock as his highly-conductive cum completes the circuit. Then tease him until his need to come overcomes his fear of the pain. It makes an interesting psychological trip (my favorite kind!) and watching your favorite hunk writhe while trying to decide whether to beg to come or beg not to is the type of sport in which I can indulge for hours at a time. Unfortunately, I haven’t yet come up with a comparable technique for a female subject!

NEEDLES

I’ve seen a couple of interesting scenes using electricity applied via needles inserted into the skin. If you try this, keep in mind all of the normal precautions in dealing with piercing, and also keep in mind that once you pierce the skin, the electrical resistance drops dramatically. It takes a very tiny amount of voltage to produce a large (for our purposes) current flow.

TUCKER TELEPHONE

This term was coined by inmates of a Georgia jail, where Warden Tucker used the ringer magneto of a field telephone to help teach those boys some respect. This comes under the heading of REAL PAIN if you use an unmodified magneto. The magnetos are available from many surplus stores, and consist of a crank geared to an armature which rotates within a group of permanent magnets. If you remove some of the magnets, you can tone down the shock level while keeping the psychological aspects. “Classic” use of this device involves connection between the balls and either the anus or ankles. Even with a couple of magnets removed, a few experiences with this toy will cause your sub to become very cooperative when you reach for the crank.

CATTLE PRODS

There are a variety of cattle prods available from both farming and S&M suppliers. These are self-contained battery powered rods with a pair of contacts on one end. Again, we’re talking about REAL PAIN here. As the name implies, these are intended to get a cow’s attention. You can tone most units down a bit by replacing one or more batteries with a piece of aluminum. Since the contacts are close together, you generally can’t get a really hazardous path unless you apply it to the chest or head, but the shock can be strong enough to tear muscles.

STUN GUNS – WARNING

Just about every magazine includes ads for so-called “stun guns” – very high voltage devices designed to incapacitate an attacker. I have not played with one of these for S&M purposes, but I’ve read a number of reports concerning serious injuries suffered by people on whom they were used by police or others. Many states have banned them, even for police use. The sparks and sound of one of these devices could be used in an interesting psych scene, but I would personally not actually apply it to my partner.

This article is only to be used for suggestions and your own resource, use at your own risk.

Article by MistressTemptingAsSin  All permissions granted Collarnuccuffs.com © 2006 img MissBonnie

Edge Play

What is edge play edge play, and How does it fit into Femdom

BDSM unlike virtually any other lifestyle offers the potential to extend the experiences of the individual into new realms and areas that they have never had the opportunity to explore before. In the beginning everything is a challenge. From the action of merely speaking an honorific title such as Mistress/Master to learning the basic responses, positions and commands that you desire for them to utilize when with you. These basic foundations are crucial to building the type of relationship that grows, evolves and flourishes. But, at some point your submissive gets it! They conquer that phase of the learning process and your exchange together in ‘scene’ may be reaching a plateau.

You have spent considerable time in conversation with your submissive about ‘their perceived limits!’ I say it this way on purpose. In any relationship limits are guessed at. In a new sub they are to some extent completely unknown. A person cannot know what they like or dislike if they have never had any occasion to experience them. There are some absolutes – these (in general may be children and animals – scat is also Very often a firm taboo!) Beyond these absolute limits there is a huge playing field.

EDGE PLAY is the action of offering new challenges to the Edges of play you and your submissive are already familiar with. Every physical challenge is equally mentally challenging as it is asking your submissive to reach beyond where they think they can . . . for you . . . for them! It may be as simple as progressing from one set of clamps to another . . . from spanking to the introduction of the crop. It may be as complex as sensory deprivation and trust play.

When is it time? First it is crucial that you have a strong established trust! Second, you must have a pretty good working knowledge as to your sub’s mindset, their attitude, moods, desires. Explore things conversationally at first. Express thoughts about say (a photo you have seen and shared), a scene you saw in a movie or read about . . . see what makes your sub nervously excited. This is called ‘planting a seed’. It forewarns your sub of where you are thinking. It allows them to talk to you in advance and prepare mentally and fantasize! This is important when your relationship is fairly young. It is fragile. Trust is so very important that you cannot thrust something on them ‘in scene’ that they might consider a violation of their limits. Out of scene later such a transgression may destroy your relationship and all of your hopes and dreams . . .

To me, the peak of EDGE PLAY is within the mind itself. It is to take the submissive further, to trust deeper, fly higher than they have ever believed possible. For each submissive the tools used to assist them are different, it is a truth that every one is different and unique. Discovering their personal triggers and using them is perhaps the greatest challenge and joy a dominant can experience!

Article by MistressTemptingAsSin © CollarNcuffs.com

Femdom teasing ideas

This is a list of suggested ideas and activities for Dominant Women to use on their submissive men. I’ve written this list because I enjoyed compiling it and I hope people will continue to send comments and additions It could be used as a starting point for couples who would like some new ideas or don’t know where to start. This list is not meant as a “how too list” but just meant to spark ideas for the newly dominant woman, as I suggest she finds her own style.

Here are a few fantastic ideas on how to tease, humiliate, punish, and torment your favorite male submissive. . Have fun!!

  • -As a basis for various games a couple rolls of the dice to see where his future lies, spin the wheel… someone mentioned using the daily lottery numbers for determining the ‘punishment of the day’…)

List of teases:

  • – Tease Your slave to get him to the point where he’ll “Do Anything to please You”
  • – Make him strip naked while You keep Your clothes on.
  • – Don’t let him masturbate or touch his cock without Your permission at any time while he is Your slave.
  • – Have him kneel before You and kiss Your feet.
  • – Tie his hands and have him undress you with his mouth/teeth. Old stockings make great ties if you have none.
  • – Have him address you as ‘Mistress’ or any name you feel good hearing, I find my name just doesn’t set the ‘scene’ as well as mistress and gives My subs a verbal enforcer as to who is in charge.
  • – Have him kiss Your ass…make him beg to kiss Your ass.
  • -Scratch him with your finger nails.
  • – Tie his hands behind his back. Have him kneel with knees spread naked in front of You while you read or watch TV, occasionally nudging his balls or penis with Your shoes.
  • – Use some strong string (kite string), tie a slip noose in the end and tighten it around the head of the penis, tug on it, pull it shake it, lead him with it, whatever pleases you.
  • – Show Your slave your panty crotch, make him smell it, but no touching without permission.
  • – Tie your slave spread eagle to the bed and tease him for hours. Make sure he has a big hard on, but once he does only touch it when he needs just a little more encouragement, don’t let him cum.
  • – Either order him to stay erect, or don’t give him permission to have a hard on… either way, punish him if he fails!
  • -Put on his favorite lingerie and tease him with Your beauty.
  • -Tickle him. Pinch his nipples.
  • -Sit on his chest and find out what he would do to be allowed to kiss your nipple. let him almost kiss it but pull away, make him beg !.
  • -Squat above his face, make him reach with his tongue to taste the crotch of your panties…get more promises
  • – Make him lick the dildo clean.
  • -Blindfold him and make him lick you to several orgasms. Take a break, cum back and do it all again.
  • – Rub his face against your pussy or sit on his face, but gag him with your panties or a gag so that he can’t lick you.
  • – Tie his balls off to something behind him so he has to tug on them to smell Your panties or kiss your ass…stay just out of reach.
  • – Masturbate in front of him. Use a dildo or a vibrator. (little hint look him fair and square in the eyes)
  • – Put the base of the dildo in his mouth and make him satisfy You with it. Do it so his nose presses between Your ass cheeks. He’ll be Your little brown nose and love it.
  • -Make him wear a cock ring (a watch strap or cat collar works well)
  • – Tie him down to the bed and tie his hands to his penis but do not give him permission to cum with harsh punishments for disobedience.
  • -Take a break, put some worn panties over his face and leave the room for a while and let him think about what else you might do.
  • – Put Your worn panties over his head so he can smell your odor.

List of Humiliations:

Once he’ll “Do Anything to please You” here’s some ideas that will keep Your slave attentive and in his proper place, and will hopefully be entertaining for You.

  • – Make him wear Your panties or lingerie, dress him up as a little girl or a French maid.
  • – Make him do housework naked or dressed in women’s clothes.
  • -Make him hand wash your panties and lingerie.
  • – Have him pamper you, have him:
  • – give you a foot/back/full body massage/rub moisturizer all over your body.
  • – give you a pedicure/manicure,
  • – paint your finger/toe nails.
  • – bathe you/shave your legs.
  • – Make him polish your shoes with his tongue.
  • – Make him wear a collar and lead him around with a leash, like a dog.
  • -have him drink out of a bowl on the floor no hands.
  • – cook and serve you a nice dinner. (naked is even better ;-))
  • – Make him masturbate for You, make him beg for permission to cum, don’t let him, punish him if he does
  • – Always make him lick you clean after sex.
  • – Tie it off in front of the sink while he does the dishes.
  • – Dress him up like the slut that he is, wear a strap-on dildo and make him beg to suck it. fuck him. (don’t forget the fuck-me red lipstick! Or the sissy and sassy Barbie pink!)
  • – Make him wear Your panties or lingerie under his regular clothes when he goes out or goes to work so that he will think of his Mistress constantly.
  • – Order him to bring himself to the edge of orgasm and stay there until you give him permission. When you give the command he must cum within 5 seconds or he will be punished and/or not allowed to cum at all. (keep him that way for 30 minutes, an hour…or as long as you want)
  • – Make him screw himself with a dildo.
  • – Attach a leash to his balls or cock ring, and lead him around with that.
  • – Make him earn his rewards; for example:
  • -Allow him to kiss your ass after the dishes are done.
  • -1 minute of pleasure for him for 10 minutes of yours.
  • -5 minutes of pleasure for him after he makes you cum 5 times.
  • -Spank him 10 times for each minute it takes him to make You cum.
  • – If You think he’s earned an orgasm, make him cum on Your feet or your ass and then make him lick You clean.
  • – go out, order him to tie himself up, be naked or dressed up as a girl and be kneeling at the door for when You arrive.
  • Ride him around as your pony boy…spurs? a riding crop?
  • – Order him to bring himself to the edge of orgasm and stay there until You give him permission. When you give the command he must cum within 5 seconds or he will be punished and/or not allowed to cum at all. (keep him that way for 30 minutes, an hour…or as long as you want)
  • -you may want to curb his interest by ordering him to jerk off 5 or 6 times in a row. Use it as skin conditioner… 3 times on each foot, have him spread it around and lick them clean after each time.
  • -have him masturbate with a handful of uncooked rice if he is annoying.
  • – Lock a padlock on his balls. (Don’t loose the key! )
  • -Have him wear a pink bow with your name written on it tied to his cock all day (a good way to remind them who they belong too)
  • – Give him a golden shower. (shower works well for this if you don’t want mess)
  • – Make him think of a new way for You to humiliate him. Punish him if you don’t think it’s good enough. Make him post it to the net (and send it to me to add to the list)

List of Punishments:

If he’s not performing to Your satisfaction, or you just feel the need to assert Your right to punish Your slave. If you don’t like inflecting pain there are other ways to make him uncomfortable and will still work to maintain you dominance over him.

  • -Tie him in an uncomfortable position.
  • – Tie his ankles together and attach his balls to them.
  • – Hog tied. (wrists and ankles tied together)
  • – Spank or whip him. (wooden spoon, hair brush, belt, ruler, ping pong paddle, riding crop, switch, cat-o-nine tails (look in the kitchen heaps of play toys.)
  • – In a chair with his knees pulled up to his shoulders – good for spanking and everything is exposed and vulnerable.
  • – Tie up his balls and cock with a long leather thong, clothes line, or boot lace. Use a long piece, and wrap the base and balls repeatedly. Do each ball separately. Tie tight loops around his shaft from base to tip then tie the end off back between his legs and up to a belt or to his handcuffs.
  • – Make him wear a chastity belt or cock cage.
  • – Hanging from the ceiling by his wrists
  • -Attach clothes pins or nipple clips to his nipples, balls, cock or wherever.
  • – Put a butt plug in his ass. Or get out the strap-on.
  • – Enema.
  • – Put Ben-gay or icy-hot on his penis and nipples.
  • – Double up on his domestic chores, make them more difficult: tie his hands; make him use a toothbrush to clean the toilet, tie his ankles with a short chain and make him wear extra high heels.
  • – Deny him orgasms for a long period of time.
  • -Put a butt plug in his ass. Or get out the strap-on.
  • – Drip candle wax on him.
  • – Have him lick You clean after you pee.
  • – Humiliate him in public…take him shopping for panties/lingerie
  • Make him do exercises (jumping jacks, leg spreads, squats, aerobics…) (Ballet is always good for a laugh )

Article by MissBonnie © collarncuffs.com (Also published by MissBonnie in German Bondage guide)

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