Category: Sex Toys and Equipment uses

A selection of “How to ‘s” of sex toys and Femdom equipment uses, articles, & reviews

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Choosing Your First Anal Sex Toy for Femdom scenes

anal play

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Do you think of buying your first anal sex toy?

Do not hurry and do not purchase the first anal sex toy you see. First of all you should take into account some things and answer some questions. This will help you to choose an anal sex toy which will suit you best and will make your anal play especially enjoyable.

Such things as personal preferences (some people love smooth penetration, whereas others want to be penetrated with something ribbed), the size, material and your budget are very important. Take all these things into account and we will help you to decide what anal sex toy will suit you best.

What kind of anal stimulation you like?

First of all try to answer this question as one of the most important things which influence your choice is your personal preferences.

Do you want to experience sensation of fullness in the anus?

In this case you should purchase a smooth Butt plug. Butt plugs are similar to dildos, but they do differ from these sex toys. First of all, being designed for anal penetration they are thinner than usual dildos. Secondly, their flared base does not allow the toy to be lost in the rectum. The variety of butt plugs is great, so choose your first butt plug carefully. The only thing we can suggest first timers is to choose a thin butt plug. You can buy a thicker one when you become experienced anal sex lover.

The way you will use your butt plug depends on your preferences. You can wear it during partner sex, masturbation or simply while walking. Anyway, you will get great sexual pleasure.

Do you want to experience more intensive anal stimulation?

Then perhaps you should choose a textured butt plug or an anal stimulator, for instance a shaped plug, which perfectly stimulates prostate. Do you know that vibration inside the anus can be as enjoyable as stimulation of testicles with a vibrator. Anal vibrators are used not only for stimulation. Vibrations relax anal muscles thus allowing you to go further, for instance to begin anal intercourse. So if you feel like stimulating your anus with enjoyable vibrations than choose among great variety of vibrators.

Choose carefully, as anal vibrators do differ. They can vibrate, rotate, pulsate and do many other things. Choose one which will suit you best!

If you want your anal sex toy to enhance your erotic sensations, than you should choose anal beads which look like two or more balls or beads connected with a thread. People use this anal sex toy to insert in the anus and then to pull it out at the moment of orgasm thus making enjoyment much stronger.

Consider the size

Take into account the fact that all anal sex toys are available in a variety of sizes. Perhaps your first anal sex toy should be the slimmest one. Then you can buy a thicker butt plug . Step by step you will realize what size suits you best, but we do recommend you than your first anal sex toy should be as slim as possible. The same concerns anal beads – for the first time choose the smallest ones, after some time you will decide whether you would like something bigger.

Consider material

As you understand anal sex toys are made of various materials. Some of them are flexible, others are more rigid. Some materials are porous, whereas others are nonporous and thus they are easier to clean and to care for. So before buying an anal sex toy find out what material it is made as well as all properties of this material and only after that make the final choice. To learn more about sex toys materials see our toy materials page

Consider your budget

Keep in mind that the material an anal sex toy is made of greatly influences the toy’s price. Most expensive anal sex toys are made of silicone, whereas less expensive ones might be made of jelly or vinyl. As well take into account that vibrating anal sex toys are more expensive than ones which do not vibrate. Take into account all things mentioned above and shop for your first anal sex toy.

Good luck!

Resource Article: MissBonnie Img: Miss Bitch.©

Related Articles:

Anal beads

Ok, I have anal beads, what now, how do I use Anal beads? Anal beads are a sex toy consisting of multiple balls attached in series. Individual balls are continuously inserted through the anus into the rectum and then removed with varying speeds depending on the desired effect. The main use of anal beads are for sexual stimulation.

first anal toy 

When it comes to buying your first anal plug, it’s important to consider the size that is right for you. The size of the plug can greatly impact your comfort and overall experience. Here are some factors to keep in mind

Strap on Harness 

A strap-on harness is a versatile sex toy that allows individuals to engage in strap-on play. Whether you’re a beginner or an experienced user Here we provide some steps to help you use a strap-on harness. How to find the perfect fit for you. What materials you should consider and what system or attachment. Remember, practice makes perfect when it comes to using a strap-on harness. Take your time, explore different positions, and enjoy the experience with your partner. when you engaging in strap-on play, have an open and honest conversation with your partner about their desires, boundaries, and consent. Mutual communication and consent are essential for a pleasurable experience.

lube  what lube for what occasion? there is ALWAYS time for lube!

Anal play For various reasons anal play or sex – yes, there is a difference -appeals to many people who are into the many forms of erotic power exchange, and Femdom/ BDSM. Although personal motivations may vary, the need for the submissive to actively cooperate as well as the fact that many people have a mental barrier here are the most common factors for this subject’s popularity. Anal play is certainly not without risks, so you should be very aware of what you are doing. When you understand and know how to minimize them, the risks are minimal.

P spot Milking – Locating and Milking the male P spot (includes Video

Key elements of a successful prostate massage I don’t profess to be the guru of p-spot stimulation, but I’d like to think that I’ve been pretty successful with it, so here’s what it is that I do.

Figging – The art of Ginger root play

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How to Use Anal Beads

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Beads for your butt?

It may sound kind of crazy, but these special beads are designed to take advantage of the pleasant sensations that can occur as your sphincter muscles open and close around a series of small round objects. When withdrawn at the peak of orgasm, you may experience an erotic thrill unlike any other. If you’re already discovered the joys of anal play with your Femdom activities you owe it to yourself to give this toy a try, either with self play or with your chosen Femdom partner.

What Are Anal Beads?

Anal beads are basically a series of small round beads spaced evenly along a cord (or sometimes attached to a stalk). Some beads are evenly sized, while others sport spheres that gradually increase as you work your way along the string. ·

  • Made of simple, jelly rubber, String beads (pic1) are great for first-time anal adventurers, as they’re relatively inexpensive and have a nice texture. (Note that since this material can’t be 100% disinfected by boiling like silicone can, we don’t recommend sharing this toy).
  • Sturdy silicone beads like Flexi beads (pic2)or classic silicone Anal beads
  • (pic3) can be cleaned easier are hygienic, extremely comfortable, and easy to clean. On top of that they warm to the body quickly and can take on the vibration of a toy that’s held to its base.
  • Beaded dildos like the Ripple (pic4) operate on the same principle as the beads, but are set along a firmer stalk or dildo.

How Do They Work?

Beads are like any other kind of butt plug with an added bonus: as each bead is inserted, the sphincter muscles contract and relax around each one for extra sensation. Some folks love the feeling of having them pulled out all at once during the moment of orgasm

How Do I Use Them?

Remember the anal mantra when it comes to butt play: “communication, lubrication, and relaxation.” that’s MissBonnies Mantra! If you’re new to anal play, you might want to learn more in our beginner’s guide to butt sex.

  • 1.Communication counts! Whether you’re using anal beads alone or with a Femdom partner you want to stay focused on what your body or your Femdom partner is telling you. Playing together? Check in with your submissive with simple questions: Do you need more lube? Would it feel better to add more stimulation on other body parts? Are you ready for another bead? Is it time to pull them out?
  • 2.Get a lube job. Since the butt doesn’t self-lubricate, it’s important to apply lots of lubricant (try a nice thick water-based lube), to your beads, and be prepared to add more as action progresses.
  • 3.Make sure you’re turned on. Read your favorite eroticia or watch some Femdom DVD’s. Listen to your partner talk dirty, but get yourself in the mood. Some people like to have an orgasm before heading for the back door to ensure their whole body is relaxed and blood is really pumping through the genitals, which can make the anus more sensitive.
  • 4.Gently caress the anus. Tap lightly or massage the anal area in preparation.
  • 5.Go slow. Take your time and insert the first bead. Stop for a moment and let your body adjust to the sensation. Insert the beads slooowly, allowing yourself to really savor the sensation. Stop to add extra lube when you need to. There’s no hurry to insert the entire set of beads to the hilt. The toy can feel just as nice when used partway, or just the first couple of beads.
  • 6.Take a breather. Even if you’re reeling from the pleasure of the beads, don’t hold your breath. It’s a common practice for folks to take shallow breaths-or forget to breathe completely-during sex, but deep breathing is essential to enjoying sex, especially of the anal persuasion. Breathing deeply draws much-needed oxygen through your body, which helps to relax your muscles even further.
  • 7.Add to your pleasure. Try adding other kinds of stimulation at the same time. vibrators make it easy to send a good buzz to nipples, penis, testicles or perineum while you’re working on the butt.
  • 8.Go for timing. With the beads inside you and your orgasm building, try to time their withdrawal with your climax.
  • 9.Gently now. Pull the beads straight out, rather than tilting them up or down. Resist the urge to yank them out as if you were starting a lawnmower, but respect your body and gently pull them out.
  • With a little bit of practice, anal beads can become your new favorite toy box addition!

Resource Article by MissBonnie © Collarncuffs.com

Related Articles:

first anal toy 

When it comes to buying your first anal plug, it’s important to consider the size that is right for you. The size of the plug can greatly impact your comfort and overall experience. Here are some factors to keep in mind

Strap on Harness 

A strap-on harness is a versatile sex toy that allows individuals to engage in strap-on play. Whether you’re a beginner or an experienced user Here we provide some steps to help you use a strap-on harness. How to find the perfect fit for you. What materials you should consider and what system or attachment. Remember, practice makes perfect when it comes to using a strap-on harness. Take your time, explore different positions, and enjoy the experience with your partner. when you engaging in strap-on play, have an open and honest conversation with your partner about their desires, boundaries, and consent. Mutual communication and consent are essential for a pleasurable experience.

lube  what lube for what occasion? there is ALWAYS time for lube!

Anal play For various reasons anal play or sex – yes, there is a difference -appeals to many people who are into the many forms of erotic power exchange, and Femdom/ BDSM. Although personal motivations may vary, the need for the submissive to actively cooperate as well as the fact that many people have a mental barrier here are the most common factors for this subject’s popularity. Anal play is certainly not without risks, so you should be very aware of what you are doing. When you understand and know how to minimize them, the risks are minimal.

P spot Milking – Locating and Milking the male P spot (includes Video

Key elements of a successful prostate massage I don’t profess to be the guru of p-spot stimulation, but I’d like to think that I’ve been pretty successful with it, so here’s what it is that I do.

Figging – The art of Ginger root play

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Leather Bondage Toys and Clothing Cleaning Guide

Our bondage sex toys and clothing bring us so much joy. The better we care for them, the longer they’ll give us pleasure. The following are some techniques for you to keep your toys in tip top condition.

Table of Contents

The BDSM Femdom lifestyle has several objects and accessories that make it possible for people in the lifestyle to enhance their BDSM experience. There are some accessories that BDSM consists of, like a collar, whip, and restraints. These accessories are not cheap and you might have paid a considerable amount to buy them, depending on where you live and how available these objects are.
It goes without saying that once you have bought these objects and accessories, you have to take care of them. Here are some important tips about BDSM accessories care.

Leather play warning NOTES

While leather articles and accessories are commonly used in the realms of BDSM, one should take into consideration several factors before using them on the submissive. There is a possibility that some people’s skin has an allergy to leather. This allergy can be harmless and just cause some discomfort to the individual, or even be serious enough to cause itches, rashes and other skin ailments.

For leather clothing and leather lingerie, it is recommended to look for manufacturers that no longer use nickel plating. Aside from the above mentioned problems, many people have a sensitivity or allergy to nickel which can cause painful irritations where it comes into contact with the skin.

Cleaning materials:

Saddle Soap: 

  • Saddle Soap is a preparatory compound which contains mild soap and also some ingredients like neatsfoot oil, lanolin and glycerin. Saddle Soap also contains bee’s wax which protects leather. Therefore, Saddle Soap is used for cleaning, softening and conditioning leather. In fact, the name Saddle Soap is derived from its use to take care of horse tacks and saddles.


Mink Oil: 

mink oil spray
  • As the name suggests, Mink oil is made of the thick fatty layer that the minks have under their skin. Mink is a rich source of palmitoleic acid. This acid is physical properties that are similar to the sebum found in humans. Therefore, it is used in many cosmetic and medical products. This oil is used for preserving and treating oil.
  • Mink oil is known to increase the waterproofing capabilities of leather, as well as preserving leather and making it softer.

Cleaning Bondage Sex Toys


Most bondage sex toys can be cleaned with soap and warm water, although leather toys need additional cleansing and reconditioning so the leather doesn’t get ruined. Using a mixture of 70% rubbing alcohol and hydrogen peroxide will disinfect and kill bacteria on leather, that soap and water may not get to. Soak the parts that came into contact with bodily fluids and let stand and few minutes. Rinse and let air dry thoroughly. Then use a leather conditioner to revitalize your toy. All sex toys should be cleaned periodically even if they don’t come into contact with bodily fluids. Even something as simple as blindfolds should be cleaned. Makeup and eye goop can get on it and that can be transferred to another person or infect the same person’s eye if there’s too much build up. Use common sense and keep your sex toys clean.

Sharing Bondage Sex Toys


If you’re sharing your sex toys with a few people and it comes into contact with bodily fluids, make sure it is cleaned and disinfected before it comes into contact with a new person. If you plan to play with more then more one person, you should have separate toys for each person. That’s the safest and label each toy to keep track of who’s who. Remember, this is all part of being a responsible sexually active adult.

Penetration Bondage Sex Toys

  • If you plan to insert any part of the sex toy (handle of whip or paddle, etc.) into your partner’s orifice, cover it with a condom.

Storage of Bondage Sex Toys

  • While preserving leather items, make sure that you do not store them in moist areas. Also you need to ensure that the leather items do not become wet. Before using water on tops of a leather item, like a leather whip, make sure that it is well protected and cleaned thoroughly afterwards. The leather items like whips, wrist and ankle restraints, etc should be kept in a cool and dry place. As is visible in several BDSM themed video and other art forms, it is a good idea to store the whip with the tails hanging down. This ensures that the tails of the whip do not become entangled while kept.
  • Keep each bondage sex toys stored separately. Don’t keep whips and chains together. The heavy chains can pull on some fabrics and ruin them. I find it best to keep all leather items together, all nylon items together, all metal items together, etc. It may sound like a pain, but the better you treat and store your toys, the longer they’ll last. I’ve also found that plastic locking bags, like ziploc, are a great way to keep bondage toys from mixing and tangling together.

Leather Clothing and Lingerie


The care of your leather clothing and leather lingerie is very important to keep it in like new peak play condition.

The most important thing to do is to follow the manufacturers care instructions.

Some other things that you can do are:

  • If your leather clothing or leather lingerie becomes wet, let it dry at room temperature.
  • If your leather clothing or leather lingerie becomes stained, gently blot liquid stains with a clean cloth.
  • It is a good idea to use a repellent product to condition your leather item.
  • Store your leather clothing or leather lingerie on a wide wooden, plastic or padded hanger to help maintain the shape
  • Do not store your leather clothing or leather lingerie in a hot or damp area.
  • Leather clothing and leather lingerie needs to be stored in a temperature controlled environment.
  • If you will be covering your leather when you are storing it; cover it with a breathable cloth like cotton sheets.
  • Do not cover your leather clothing or leather lingerie with plastic. The plastic will cause the leather to dry out.
  • Avoid exposing your leather to direct sunlight for prolonged periods of time.

All leather items can last for a lifetime if they are regularly maintained and treated well. Leather is skin and just as you would clean your own, you need to clean and nourish your leather to help retain its durability and texture.

Preservation:

Leather conditioners should be applied with a soft cloth to not only help in the cleaning process, but to also provide good water repellent properties, such as the mink oil mentioned above.

 Cleaning:

  • Continual contact with moisture (sweat, rain, urine, alcohol, etc.,) can cause the leather to stiffen. Before you start cleaning the full surface of your leather item, test out the cleaner on a smaller, less visible area.  Wait a few minutes. If you don’t notice any color distortion, proceed with the rest of the item.
  • When cleaning your leather NEVER use strong detergents such as laundry detergent.  Always choose a product that helps preserve the leather’s natural lubricating oils rather than strip them away. Most cleaning products sold in department and shoe stores are safe. But, it never hurts to ask.
  • Warm soapy water, using baby shampoo or a similar soap, is the best cleaning solution for removing difficult or oily marks, stains or odors. Rub baby shampoo into the area of any oily stains before rinsing. Try to avoid cleaners that leave any sort of grease or residue. Residue can make leather vulnerable to bacteria, which will tarnish the leather and eventually break down the stitching. To remove the excess cleaner, use a slightly dampened cloth or a small brush around the stitching.
  • Make sure soap/shampoo is rinsed out thoroughly to avoid stiffening.
  • Leather should never be dried in front of a direct heat source as this damages the leather and also causes the hide to stiffen. Make sure to clean and treat your leather before it’s dry. Never use heat to dry leather (it should air-dry) and always stuff the garment while it’s drying, in order to make sure it maintains its shape.
  • When storing leather articles, don’t throw them to the bottom of the wardrobe, instead hang them up and make sure they are ventilated to prevent them from molding.
  • Get a Nubuck cloth; it’s a great leather care tool for cleaning and restoring your item to its original look.
  • Clean your leather goods as often as you need to and make sure they’re dust-free at all times.
  • Never use caustic household chemicals to clean your leather items.

Removing Stains and Smells

Sweat

  • When the leather becomes slightly stiffened or an itchy irritation occurs, this is usually a sign that sweat has permeated the leather. Washing in warm water with baby shampoo or fabric softener will help soften the leather and remove the irritation.

Odors

  • To remove odors, use a teaspoon of bicarbonate soda crystals in about 1 quart/liter of warm water and let the solution soak into the skin

Oils and Oil Based Lubricants

  • These can be difficult to remove. Use baby shampoo or a similar soap in a few tablespoons of water and rubbing slowly onto the spots can help their removal. Rinse thoroughly. As another alternative, most oil or grease stains can be lifted by grinding up blackboard chalk, sprinkling it onto the affected area, and leaving the powder on for one full day.

Wax

  • Place blotting paper or brown paper on the leather and then apply a cool/moderate iron to remove wax from leather. Keep applying the iron on clean blotting or brown paper, to the wax spot until the paper is no longer absorbing the wax.

Urine Stains

  • Uric acid found in urine is very damaging to leather. When leather has been in contact with urine, it should be washed out immediately after use with warm soapy water (baby shampoo). Leaving urine-stained items overnight can cause irreparable damage.

Blood Stains

  • Leather becomes stiff and odorous if blood is allowed to dry. If blood gets on your leather clothing or leather lingerie, hand wash immediately.

Hygiene

  • Germs can be killed by soaking leather clothes in 1 teaspoon bleach to 1 gallon of water for up to 1/2 hour. Rinse thoroughly and hand wash immediately after bleaching. Bleaching can damage leather so minimal use is necessary.

Removing Mold and Mildew

  • In case mildew builds up, mix one cup of rubbing alcohol with one cup of water. Dip a clean cloth in the solution and wipe the mildewed area. For more persistent mildew, use mild soap containing germicide and water. Wipe the excess soap with a clean cloth and let dry.

Metal Fittings

  • Most buckles, rivets, studs, snaps, rings, etc., are nickel plated steel with the exception of chain which is chrome plated steel and other metal fittings that are brass coated. If the fittings are not cleaned regularly or cleaned and dried after contact with moisture, rusting will occur. When cleaning leather with conditioner, applying the conditioner to the metal fittings will increase their longevity. Surface rust can be removed with chrome cleaner, Autosol, WD40 (nickel), or Brasso (brass).   For leather clothing and leather lingerie, it is recommended to look for manufacturers that no longer use nickel plating. As above mentioned in Leather play warning notes, many people have a sensitivity or allergy to nickel which can cause painful irritations where it comes into contact with the skin.


Many bondage toys and leather clothing are expensive so make sure you treat them well. Many bondage, especially leather items can last you a lifetime. So if you care for your toy, clean it properly and store it safely, you’ll get a lot of mileage out it.

Resource Article : MissBonnie © CollarNcuffs.com

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Index to The Beginners Guide to Vibrators

group of vibes

Table of Contents

Vibrators do something no human body can. They move faster, more consistently, and for longer periods of time than any fingers ever could and by simply adding extra stimulation to sex play vibrators can be a wonderful addition to sex and Femdom play. As you read on about vibrators keep in mind that while they are wonderful things, But vibrators aren’t solutions to sexual problems you may be having with a partner, they are a tool and a toy.


People use vibrators externally, internally, or both. Vibrators for penetration may be safe for vaginal or anal penetration, but be sure you’re vibe is safe for anal use before using it that way.


Anyone can use a vibrator, they aren’t made for certain genders or certain kinds of bodies, they’re made for a function. If you’re new to vibrators below you’ll find answers to common questions about vibrators, tips on how to choose vibrators, vibrator safety tips, and how to use vibrators for male and females, with or with out a Femdom play partner.

History of the Vibrator


History of the Vibrator – Vibrators have come a long way from when the types of vibrating sex toys for women available were Classical Era contraptions involving carts driven over rough stone roads and crude planks swung back and forth to induce vibration and, hopefully, orgasm.
The history of the vibrator reveals technology at work to reduce what was regarded as onerous manual labor for what was labeled female hysteria. Before long, both vibrators and hysteria faded from the American scene. When vibrators became prominent in stag films, they quickly disappeared from the home. Medicine advanced, any most of the symptoms associated with hysteria were identified as specific, discrete conditions and perception of women’s sensuality progressed in the public mind. Still, female hysteria brings about a whiff of strange nostalgia—with all the peculiar early treatments for female hysteria and bizarre vibrator prototypes that went along with it.

Why Use Vibrators?


Why Use Vibrators – There are as many reasons to use a vibrator as there are reasons to feel good. Some common reasons include:

  • Curiosity
  • Self-discovery
  • Spicing up a long-term sexual relationship
  • Help experiencing orgasms
  • Too reach the Female g spot when a partner can not
  • Extra stimulation with Femdom play
  • Just for fun
  • With Anal play
  • With prostrate milking

How to Use Vibrators for women, Men and couples


Vibrators may be the last consumer product group to come with absolutely no instructions or manuals from the manufacturers. At first blush you may think your vibrator doesn’t need a manual, but there are hundreds of different things to do with a vibrator, and if you’ve never used one a few pointers may be appreciated.

Beginners Guide to Vibrator use for men – On our ‘on site training entertainment program. A taste of Cyber, ‘it’s surprising the amount of subbies who have no idea I they could use a vibrator on themselves for play. They either thought vibrators only worked on women, or they weren’t for “guys like them.”
Once most of these men gave vibrators a chance, they quickly became converts.
Men in particular are offered a narrow set of sexual options, and vibrators can help expand those options and discover pleasure and orgasms you didn’t even know were in you. If you’re curious, on the link above there are some tips for men on how to use a vibrator, alone, or with a partner.

»»Vibrators aren’t made for a certain kind of person, vibes are for anyone interested in discovering new ways to feel sexual pleasure. MissBonnie

Beginners Guide to Vibrator use for women – Few if any vibrators come with instruction manuals. On the one hand, you might think that no manual is necessary – after all shouldn’t you know how to use a vibrator? But if you’ve never used one, how exactly are you supposed to know how? Most people do manage to stumble their way to pleasure with a vibrator, but if you’re looking for a few helpful hints here is a beginner’s guide for women on how to use a vibrator alone or with a partner.

Choosing the right Vibrator for the occasion


Choosing the right Vibrator for the occasion – Shopping for your first vibrator can be a daunting experience. There are dozens of different styles and thousands of different products, and few stores offer guidance on where to start. Differences in vibrator material, price and quality, and function account for most of the variation. We have put together for you a visual guide to vibrators and there individual uses.

Which are the Best Vibrators?-Vibe Guide

Which are the Best Vibrators – Finding the vibrator that’s right for you depends on answering some basic questions, including:

  • What do you want to use the vibrator for?
  • What’s the best material for your vibrator to be made from?
  • What is your budget?
  • What do you want your vibrator to look like?
  • Is quality more important than cost?

Vibrators do differ wildly in terms of quality, but you should be able to find a vibrator in your price range that can be used safely. Our guide can help with these issues

Cleaning Vibrators

cleaning sex toys

RUB, SILICONE, AND PLASTIC

Sex toys made of rub (soft skin), silicone and plastic must be washed in the same way, but these materials require more delicacy. Dry them in the open air, rather than with a towel. Silicone is the easiest to clean. Silicone is resistant to heat. You can clean them in different ways : one way is to boil your toys for 2 to 3 minutes in plain water. -If you have a dishwasher, you can wash silicone toys in there also. Warm water and a soft soap will also do the trick (do not use corrosive soaps, use gentle soaps.) To make cleaning of sex toys which are supposed to be inserted inside the body (dildos, vibrators, plugs) easier put the condom on these devices every time you use them. Never talc devices made of soft synthetic materials. (talc powder has been linked to cervical cancer).

VINYL, TRUESKIN CYBERSKIN AND JELLY

these toys are less resistant than silicone toys, we recommend: Warm Water and a soft soap (Do NOT boil ! or use HOT water)

Materials

Just as vibrators come in different shapes and sizes, they are also made from all kinds of materials. Vibrators can be hard-shelled—made of Pyrex, plastic, gold or aluminum. Lots of vibrators are soft, bendable and flexible; it’s more likely that these were constructed of silicone, rubber, latex, jelly, a jelly/silicone blend or Cyberskin (a material that mimic the feel of real skin). In the following links, we’ll discuss the possible advantages and disadvantages of each type of material. We hope this information helps you make an informed and pleasing decision.

RUB, SILICONE, AND PLASTIC

VINYL, TRUESKIN CYBERSKIN AND JELLY

Remember that your vibrator is an electronic pleasure item. Just like other electronics, name brands and more expensive items generally perform better and last longer than cheaper products. A cheaper vibrator will serve you well, but may break sooner than a similar, more expensive item.

Sizes and Sizing

Just as vibrators come in different shapes, all kinds of materials. Vibrators also come in various sizes but how do know just what size. In the following link, we’ll discuss sizing issues. We hope this information helps you make an informed and pleasing decision.

Vibrator sizes and Sizing

Traveling With Vibrators

Have Vibe, Will Travel

Maybe you’re planning a romantic weekend, or perhaps you’re going on a long business trip. Either way, if you’re flying, you’ll want to make sure you pack your sex toys well to avoid embarrassing situations.

How Many People Use Vibrators?


How Many People Use Vibrators – People of every age, socio-economic class, race, gender, sexual identity, and political and religious affiliation use vibrators. That said, not everyone uses them, and they aren’t “required” for a great sex life. The point is that everyone has (or should have, depending on the state you live in) the right to sexual choice and experimentation, which for many people includes using vibrators.

Resource Article: MissBonnie and MissBitch for The Beginner’s Guide to Vibrators © CollarNcuffs.com

Many, many thank yous to Cle-Andria for her help with images, allowing us to destroy her shop shelves in the name of kink, and her wealth of information

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Why Use Vibrators?

mixed group of vibes

Vibrators often allow people to achieve orgasm rapidly and with relative ease as compared to other methods. In addition, vibrators are reported[ to provide stronger orgasms than those produced by manual stimulation alone. They are often recommended by sex therapists for women who have difficulty reaching orgasm by other means. Couples also use them sometimes as an enhancement to the pleasure of one or both partners.


Some vibrators are marketed as “body massager’s” — although they still may be used, like the ones sold as adult sex toys, for autoeroticism.
Some vibrators run on batteries while others have a power cord that plugs in to a wall socket. There is also a vibrator that uses the flow of air from a vacuum cleaner to stimulate the clitoris.

There is a lot of pressure to be sexual in the “right” way, and some people feel like they should use a vibrator. The fact is that you can have an incredible sex life without vibrators or sex toys at all. That said, using vibrators is a completely healthy (and potentially pleasure inducing) way to explore your sexuality.

There are as many reasons to use a vibrator as there are reasons to feel good.

Here are some of the most common reasons people play with vibrators:

Curiosity: Sexual curiosity is healthy; wanting to try a vibrator is reason enough to try one.

  • Self-discovery: Particularly for those of us who have never been given the opportunity or permission to explore being sexual, vibrators can be a great way to explore your body. When using a vibrator by yourself you can start exploring yourself, your sensations (both physical and emotional) and reactions in a relatively safe environment.
  • To “spice up” a long term sexual relationship:Vibrators can shake things up (literally and figuratively) in a long term relationship if sex has become routine or exploration has fizzled out.
  • To experience orgasm for the first time: For many people, especially women, who never or rarely experience orgasm, vibration can be the fastest and easiest way to discover their orgasmic potential.
  • For extra stimulation that you can’t add on your own: Many people aren’t able to stimulate themselves the way they want to.
  • Chronic ‘bad styled’ pain: disability, and fatigue don’t stop you from feeling pleasure, but vibrators can sometimes make it easier to get there.
  • For fun: For the most part the reason we all use, or consider using, vibrators is the same: because it’s pleasurable. Pleasure, however you define it, is pretty close to a universal desire
  • Pressure: This is NOT a good reason to use toys, but it’s why some people do.
  • Variety is the spice of sex: Many women who enjoy other forms of sexual contact–and are orgasmic in other ways–still enjoy the special sensations vibrators provide. It’s like ice cream flavors. Why limit yourself to a few when there are more to try?
  • Difficulty with arousal and orgasm: Most men become sexually aroused fairly easily, and according to a study in the Journal of the American Medical Association, about one-third of men ejaculate before they would like to. So men often have trouble understanding that many women find it difficult to become sexually aroused and achieve orgasm. Men need to understand that it’s NORMAL for women to experience sex in this way. Many women feel bad that they take “too long” to get turned on enough to achieve orgasm. They fear that the man will get bored or tired or disgusted. For these women, vibrators eliminate guilt about the time it takes them to feel turned on and come.
  • Can’t come without it: For some women, no amount of direct clitoral stimulation by hand or tongue can trigger orgasm. The only thing that does it is the intense stimulation a vibrator provides. Women in this situation typically feel inadequate, like something is wrong with them. Some women in this situation have histories of sexual abuse or emotional problems that might account for their inability to come without a vibrator. But for many others, there is no discernible cause. That’s just the way they are. They might be wonderful women in every other way. They just need a vibrator to come. That’s fine. It’s normal. The situation is similar to those who need glasses. Usually it’s not clear why their eyesight weakens. It just does. Fortunately, we have glasses for them–and vibrators for women who need them.

»»Whether your partner is well meaning or not, if you’re being pressured to try using a vibrator it won’t work, and it shows a lack of respect of your boundaries. Vibrators are ultimately about feeling pleasure, and you can’t force someone to experience pleasure, because experiencing pleasure is in some ways an expression of free will. Everyone has the right to say no to using a vibrator, just as we all have the right to say no to any kind of sex play at any time.
MissBonnie


Resource Article : MissBonnie and MissBitch for The Beginner’s Guide to Vibrators © CollarNcuffs.com

Many, many thank yous to Cle-Andria for her help with images, allowing us to destroy her shop shelves in the name of kink, and her wealth of information.

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Vibrator sizing and sizes

g spot vibes

Table of Contents

What To Watch Out For

There are a lot of vibrators that are made as a novelty and break easily so it is important to choose wisely, selecting from a reputable store with high quality products.

The most important thing when buying a vibrator online is knowing the SIZE. Please refer to the measurements supplied by the retailer they have outlined by each of the products so that you do not get something that is too big or small. If the retailer doesn’t list sizes, or can’t supply them we suggest you move on to another retailer that can. Not being able to inform you of size ‘suggests’ a company with bad business ethics, and lack of product knowledge. There are many, many more reputable companies.

Determining Size

Sometimes it is hard to gage what is the best size. I remember ordering my first dildo online and then getting one that was supposed to be “realistic” and ended up thinking that King Kong himself would be envious when I saw how big it actually was!

TomCat

  May I suggest using a simple test of finger width or vegetable testing before deciding on a width or length.
Using your fingers or a vegetable like a carrot or cucumber may help you decide what width and length to get.
You should certainly wash or cover with a condom anything you insert in any orifice of your body prior and then take some time to determine what will bring you the most pleasure.
You can also have a partner assist in either exercise for a fun sexual adventure!

Diameter Vs. Circumference

Also, remember the difference between circumference and diameter when assessing how large your sex toy is going to be.


Article: tomcat for The Beginner’s Guide to Vibrators © CollarNcuffs.com

Many, many thank yous to Cle-Andria for her help with images, allowing us to destroy her shop shelves in the name of kink, and her wealth of information.

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Silicone Sex Toys

Silicone. It’s not exactly what you might think of as a sensual or erotic material. Silicone sex toys, however, are the new wave in personal pleasure; in fact, most purveyors of fine adult products suggest using nothing but silicone. Traditionally, toys have been made out of plastic, wood, jelly (latex), rubber and leather (not to mention the widespread but unofficial use of housewares and produce). Making silicone toys is a time-consuming endeavor, and the material itself is of a very high quality. These two issues make for a relatively expensive end product. Silicone toys are usually equipped with higher-end motors and other internal components, so you get better quality for your higher price.

So why silicone? It absorbs body heat and retains this warmth for a relatively long time, making for a more natural and comfortable feel. It’s also flexible yet firm, giving it a much more pleasing texture than the hard feel of most plastic toys. Silicone is non-porous and therefore does not absorb odors and bacteria; this also means that a little lube goes a long way. This is the best material for toys that you’re going to share, as silicone can also be boiled for up to six minutes to kill any nasty bacteria hanging around on the surface. Just try boiling that cheap plastic thing you got five years ago and see what happens.

Silicone toys are generally hand-crafted, and come in an interesting array of colors, shapes and sizes. This is one area of the sex toy trade dominated by women, which has resulted in woman-friendly design. This has meant, in part, a move away from “realistic” dildos and vibrators. For instance, one of the most popular models on the market is a smiling dolphin available in a rainbow of colors including violet and yellow. More and more women are purchasing their own toys and choosing to please themselves with designs built for clitoral stimulation as opposed to traditional and all-too-often ho hum penetrative stimulation. Considering that a woman’s most sensitive area is the clitoris and, for those who skipped sex ed, the clitoris is not inside the vagina but rather sits at the top of the vulva, penetration is not necessarily where it’s at.

So next time you’re out scouting for a little something to light up your nights, skip the hard plastic bargain-basement jobby and treat yourself to some real quality.

Article Shelley Taylor This work is licensed under a Creative Commons License . A version of this article also appeared in Brink magazine (June 1, 1998).

used as part of the beginners guide to vibrators

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Hard-Shell Vibrators

Table of Contents


Hard-shell vibrators are usually crafted from a hard plastic material. Hard-shell vibrators are ideal for on-the-spot internal or external stimulation. The vibrations of a hard-shell vibrator that is powered by two AA batteries will feel much stronger than those from a soft vibrator that utilizes the same power supply. Hard-shell vibes are easy to clean as well. Hard-shell vibrators are sometimes made of Pyrex (a type of glass), gold or aluminum. These materials can be cooled or heated for added sensations.

hard plastic vibes



Hard plastic vibrators:

  • tend to be stronger than soft rubber vibrators
  • are easier to clean
  • don’t bend when you press them against your body allowing you to better adjust the pressure of the vibrator
  • less likely to cause an allergic reaction

External hard plastic vibrators:

  • can be small bullet or egg style vibrators, or longer wand style vibrators.
  • They may be battery powered vibrators or electric (plug-in) vibrators.

The main differences between vibrators for external stimulation are:

  • the strength and quality of the motor
  • the type of vibration (there is buzzing, thumping, rotating, pulsating, and more)
  • the texture of the vibrator (ridges, bumps, smooth)
  • shape, size and color
  • If this is your first vibrator it is probably best to choose one with variable speed.

These vibrators have several additional benefits.

  • They have a weight to them which can be very pleasurable when used for penetration.
  • the material makes the vibration resonate in a different fashion, which is noticeable when using it.
  • Metal toys also cool down and warm up, adding another element to the sensation.


If this is your first vibrator, and you’re looking for something to use externally for clitoral stimulation, hard plastic might be the way to go.

Metal vibrators, while highly prized, do tend to be more expensive and may not be a great idea for first timer

Article MissBonnie and MissBitch The beginners guide to vibrators

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Jelly-Rubber Sex Toys And Their Health Risks

The phallic playthings dangle along the back wall of Lovers. Lined up on a shelf, their sparkly glitter insides shine through the thick layer of packaging, but something more sinister is also lurking in the sexy line up of jelly rubber dildos, vibrators and anal beads.

MissBonnie

You’re probably hearing or reading a lot lately about jelly-rubber sex toys and their health risks. While they are usually less expensive and many people like the silky feel and flesh-like responsiveness of these toys, you should be very aware of the down-side. Ongoing studies have shown that there are genuine concerns with using these items. Jelly-rubber contains phthalates. (Thall-ates), are porous, and extremely difficult to properly clean after use. Most experts recommend using condom or condom-like coverings over phthalate-based sex toys.

Without getting too technical, phthalates are chemical compounds used to increase flexibility. They’re used to turn hard plastic into what’s described as jelly-rubber. One of the first indications that this is an unstable combination came about when after repeated use, people noticed their sex toys made of this substance began to fragment and discolor after only a few months. Another problem is that jelly-rubber is porous. That means fluids and bacteria can be absorbed and transmitted through toy use. In other words, jelly-rubber sex toys can be “carriers” of STDs and other harmful diseases and health conditions. Still another issue is that jelly-rubber sex toys are mass produced — like “cheap novelties” — in countries which often have very lax manufacturing codes and inspection conditions.

Most sex toy manufacturers and retailers have responded to these serious concerns by emphasizing their non-phthalate based products and producing educational materials about the dangers inherent in jelly-rubber items. No official regulations, however, have been adopted to prevent the sale of phthalate-based toys, so it’s still a buyer beware situation. Other porous and phthalate-based materials used in sex toys include Cyberskin and soft vinyl. Elastomer, while phthalate-free, is semi-porous and cannot be adequately cleaned. Even silicone mix products may contain phthalates. All of these items should be covered by a condom when used.

Does this mean you should immediately throw out all your phthalate-based sex toys?

Not necessarily. It DOES mean that you should be aware of the risks involved and that your ’safe sex’ practices should include replacing them when they begin to show ‘use fatigue’ and always covering them with a condom when in use.

Smart shoppers are already showing a marked preference for non-phthalate-based and non-porous sex toys. There is a wider variety now available and manufacturers are aware of the demand. Pure silicone, such as VixSkin, Lucite, acrylic, glass, and metal toys can be cleaned and disinfected and will outlast their cheaper counterparts. Your health is worth it!

Article: MissBonnie and MissBitch for The Beginner’s Guide to Vibrators © CollarNcuffs.com

Many, many thank yous to Cle-Andria for her help with images, allowing us to destroy her shop shelves in the name of kink, and her wealth of information.

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How Many People Use Vibrators?

Table of Contents


There is a lot of pressure to be sexual in the “right” way, and some people feel like they should use a vibrator. The fact is that you can have an incredible sex life without vibrators or sex toys at all. That said, using vibrators is a completely healthy (and potentially pleasure inducing) way to explore your sexuality.

There are as many reasons to use a vibrator as there are reasons to feel good.

Here are some of the most common reasons people play with vibrators:

  • Curiosity:Sexual curiosity is healthy; wanting to try a vibrator is reason enough to try one.
  • Self-discovery: Particularly for those of us who have never been given the opportunity or permission to explore being sexual, vibrators can be a great way to explore your body. When using a vibrator by yourself you can start exploring yourself, your sensations (both physical and emotional) and reactions in a relatively safe environment.
  • To “spice up” a long term sexual relationship:Vibrators can shake things up (literally and figuratively) in a long term relationship if sex has become routine or exploration has fizzled out.
  • To experience orgasm for the first time: For many people, especially women, who never or rarely experience orgasm, vibration can be the fastest and easiest way to discover their orgasmic potential.
  • For extra stimulation that you can’t add on your own:Many people aren’t able to stimulate themselves the way they want to.
  • Chronic ‘bad styled’ pain, disability, and fatigue don’t stop you from feeling pleasure, but vibrators can sometimes make it easier to get there.
  • For fun:For the most part the reason we all use, or consider using, vibrators is the same: because it’s pleasurable. Pleasure, however you define it, is pretty close to a universal desire
  • Pressure:This is NOT a good reason to use toys, but it’s why some people do.

»»Whether your partner is well meaning or not, if you’re being pressured to try using a vibrator it won’t work, and it shows a lack of respect of your boundaries. Vibrators are ultimately about feeling pleasure, and you can’t force someone to experience pleasure, because experiencing pleasure is in some ways an expression of free will. Everyone has the right to say no to using a vibrator, just as we all have the right to say no to any kind of sex play at any time.MissBonnie


The increasing visibility of vibrators in mainstream media, and in retail stores that don’t specialize in sex toys is bringing some people to my door asking the question, how many people really use vibrators?


Until recently there hasn’t been much reliable research on vibrator use. The people who collect most of the information about vibrator use tend to be, not surprisingly, the people who are trying to sell us more vibrators. These surveys are always tied to some form of marketing and methodologies are rarely described in detail.


In 2009 Michael Reece and Debra Herbenick, along with colleagues at Indiana University published to surveys of vibrator use which offered a much more reliable and detailed look into the hows and whys of vibrator use. Their findings are below. Beneath their findings I’ve included the numbers from earlier research some of which amounts to no more than marketing material but others represent serious study on vibrator use.


Overall Reece and Herbenick found that just under 50% of respondents reported using a vibrator at some point, with slightly more women (52%) than men (45%) reporting vibrator use.

When Do You Use Vibrators?

Women reported using vibrators most during masturbation (46%) and least during intercourse (37%). Men were most likely to use vibrators with a partner during “sex play or foreplay” (40%). Only 17% of men reported using a vibrator for masturbation. The paper on men reported on reasons for first using a vibrator, and the most common one men gave (67%) was “for fun”. 40% of men said they used one to help a partner with orgasms, and 7% said they used it to help themselves to have an orgasm.

Vibrator Use and Sexual Function

The researchers compared vibrator users and non-vibrator users on several measures of sexual functioning (asking questions about things like erectile function, intercourse satisfaction, pain, orgasm, lubrication, and sexual desire). Overall men and women who used vibrators reported fewer problems with sexual function. And people who used vibrators more recently (the past month) responded to surveys in a way that indicated fewer problems with sexual function.

Vibrator Use and Other Healthy Behaviors

Both men and women who use vibrators were more likely to do things that indicate a comfort with their bodies and an interest in taking care of themselves. Women who had ever used a vibrator were more likely than those who had never used a vibrator to have had a gynecologic exam in the past year and performed a genital self-examine in the past month. Men who reported performing testicular self-exams within the past moth were more likely to have used a vibrator.

Sex Toy Cleaning

The good news is that the majority of men and women do clean their vibrators. The bad news is that some don’t (20% of men and 14% of women report never cleaning their toys). Of those who do clean, habits could still improve. 60% of women and 53% of men report cleaning their toy before and after use, with the rest either cleaning before or after. It’s not clear if they asked this, but what I’d be most interested in knowing is whether or not they cleaned the toy before first use, something that I think a lot of people overlook but it important considering the serious lack of hygiene in most sex toy factories.

Side Effects of Vibrator Use

The researchers only reported on women’s responses to questions about negative side effects of vibrator use. They asked women about genital numbness, pain, irritation, swelling (the bad kind) and tears or cuts.
Here are the findings:

  • 71.5% of women never experienced any side effects.
  • 16% reported numbness
  • 3% reported pain
  • 10% reported irritation
  • 8% reported swelling
  • 1% reported tears or cuts

In all cases, those who reported negative side effects judged them to be relatively short lived and minor in severity.

How Common Is Vibrator Use

Previous to 2009 most statistics suggested between 20-27% of people had used a vibrator at some point in their lives. Some examples of survey research include:

  • In Shere Hite’s famous survey (1976), only 1% of respondents said they had ever used a vibrator
  • In a 2006 Elle/MSNBC.com survey 40% of respondents said they had used a vibrator.
  • In a 1996 survey of Swedish women aged 18 to 74, 19% of respondents said they had used a sex toy by themselves, and 15% said they had used a sex toy with a partner.
  • Younger repondents were more likely to have used a sex toy, with 30% of women 25 to 34 reporting having used a sex toy.

Age of First Vibrator Use

Two surveys that have asked this got very similar results:

  • 15 to 17% were under 20 years old when they first tried a vibrator
  • 50% were in their 20s
  • 22 to 27% were in their 30s
  • 8 to 10% were 40 and older

Vibrator Use by Gender

In the two surveys that compared vibrator use between men and women, women were more likely to use vibrators:

  • One study found that 33% of female respondents versus 20% of male respondents used vibrators
  • Another study found that the numbers were 24% for women and 21% for men.

What else about people who use vibrators?

Here are some random statistics from the surveys listed below:

  • Most studies found that vibrator users were overwhelmingly white.
  • Most studies found that vibrator users were predominantly in their thirties.
  • According to Xandria Collection’s Toys in the Sheets survey, the most common vibrator user was a white Christian married woman, in her thirties, who votes Republican.
  • According to the Durex global sex survey Australia has the highest vibrator use reported (46%) and India has the lowest (3%). The US is up there at 45%.
  • Women in relationships are more likely to use a vibrator than women who are single.


Article: MissBonnie and MissBitch for The Beginner’s Guide to Vibrators © CollarNcuffs.com

Many, many thank yous to Cle-Andria for her help with images, allowing us to destroy her shop shelves in the name of kink, and her wealth of information. Sources:
1.Berman Center/Drugstore.com survey “The Health Benefits of Sexual Aids & Devices: A Comprehensive Study of their Relationship to Satisfaction and Quality of Life. Unpublished, 2004.
2.Castleman, M. & Lawrence Research Group. Toys in the Sheets. 1999. Accessed on Xandria.com September 12, 2006.
3.Davis, Clive M.; Blank, Joani; Lin, Hung-Yu. “Characteristics of Vibrator Use Among Women.” The Journal of Sex Research Vol. 33, No. 4 (1996).
4.Elle/MSNBC.com reader sex survey, 2006. Accessed on MSNBC.com, September 12, 2006.
5.Fugl-Meyer, K.S., Öberg, K., Lundberg,P.O., et al. “On Orgasm, Sexual Techniques, and Erotic Perceptions in 18- to 74-Year-Old Swedish Women” Journal of Sexual Medicine Volume 3, No. 1, (2006):56-68.
6.Herbenick, D., Reece, M., Sanders, S.A., et. al. “Prevalence and Characteristics of Vibrator Use by Women in the United States: Results from a Nationally Representative Study” Journal of Sexual Medicine Early View, Date: June 2009. Accessed June 1, 2009.
7.Hite, S. The Hite Report New York: Macmillan, 1976.
8.Levin, R. J., & Levin, A. Sexual Pleasure: The Surprising Preferences of 100,000 Women. Redbook Magazine, September, 1975.
9.Reece, M., Herbenick, D., Sanders, S.A., et. al. “Prevalence and Characteristics of Vibrator Use by Men in the United States” Journal of Sexual Medicine Early View, Date: May 2009. Accessed May 31, 2009.
10.Wolfe, L. The Cosmo Report. New York: Arbor House, 1981.

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