Submissive Femdom / BDSM Play Partner Check List

Please Note. Update 2022: we have many more free printable checklists contained within our 100% Free to use Femdom Community

This questionnaire should be filled out by a Sub and provided to their Dom/Top before playing with them. This will provide a quick “head-start” to identifying limits, negotiating and finding common ground for play. For each item, you need to provide two answers:

  • First write YES or NO next to each item to indicate if you have ever DONE that activity.
  • Mark N/A if it does not apply to your gender.
  • Next, indicate for each item how you FEEL about that activity by rating it on a scale of NO or 0 to 5.
  • NO means you will NOT do that item under any circumstances (a hard limit).
  • 0 (zero) indicates you have utterly no desire to do that activity and don’t like doing it (in fact, may loath it) and would ordinarily object to doing it, but you would be willing to do it to please the Dominant if it they really wanted it. (sometimes called a “soft limit”).
  • 1 means you don’t want to do or like to do this activity, but wouldn’t object if it was asked of you.
  • 2 means you are willing to do this activity, but it has no special appeal for you.
  • 3 means you usually like doing this activity, at least on an irregular/ occasional basis.
  • 4 means you like doing this activity, and would like to experience it on a regular basis.
  • 5 means the activity is a wild turn-on for you, and you would like it as often as possible.

Mark with an asterisk (*) those items which you are willing to do only with you current sex partner(s), but not with casual play-partners.

Note any additional information which might be important for your Domme to know.

There is intentionally some overlap between categories. Unless otherwise stated, the Sub is the recipient of the activity.

Partner Check List
ActivitiesExperience, Willingness
yes/no,NO or 0-5
Abrasion
Age play
Anal sex
Anal plugs (small)
Anal plugs (large)
Anal plug (public, under clothes)
Animal roles
Arm & leg sleeves (armbinders)
Asphyxiation
Auctioned for charity
Bathroom use control
Beastiality
Beating (soft)
Beating (hard)
Blindfolds
Being serviced (sexual)
Being bitten
Breast/chest bondage
Breath control
Branding
Boot worship
Bondage (light)
Bondage (heavy)
Bondage (multi-day)
Bondage (public, under clothing)
Breast whipping
Brown showers (scat)
Cages (locked inside of)
Caning
Catheterization
Cells/Closets (locked inside of)
Chastity belts
Chaueffering
Choking
Clothespins
Cock worship
Collars (worn in private)
Collars (worn in public)
Competitions (with other Subs)
Corsets (wearing)
Cuffs (leather)
Cuffs (metal)
Cutting
Dilation
Double penetration
Electricity
Enemas
Enforced chastity
Examinations (physical)
Exercise (forced/required)
Exhibitionism (friends)
Exhibitionism (strangers)
Eye contact restrictions
Face slapping
Fantasy abandonment
Fantasy rape
Fantasy gang-rape
Fisting (anal)
Fisting (vaginal)
Following orders
Foot worship
Forced dressing
Forced homosexuality
Forced masturbation
Forced nudity (private)
Forced nudity (around others)
Forced servitude
Full head hoods
Gags (cloth)
Gags (rubber)
Gags (tape)
Gates of Hell (male)
Genital sex
Given away to another Dom (temp)
Given away to another Dom (perm)
Golden showers
Hairbrush spankings
Hair pulling
Hand jobs (giving)
Hand jobs (receiving)
Harems (serving w/other subs)
Harnessing (leather)
Harnessing (rope)
Having food chosen for you
Having clothing chosen for you
Head (giving fellatio)
Head (receiving fellatio)
High heel worship
Homage with toungue (non-sexual)
Hot oils (on genitals)
Hot waxing
Housework (doing)
Human puppy dog
Humiliation (private)
Humiliation (public)
Hypnotism
Ice cubes
Infantalism
Initiation rites
Injections
Intricate (Japanese) rope bondage
Interrogations
Kidnapping
Kneeling
Leather clothing
Leather restraints
Lectures for misbehavior
Licking (non-sexual)
Manacles & Irons
Manacures (giving)
Massage (giving)
Massage (receiving)
Medical scenes
Modeling for erotic photos
Mouth bits
Mummification
Nipple clamps
Nipple weights
Oral/anal play (rimming)
Over-the-knee spanking
Orgasm denial
Orgasm control
Outdoor scenes
Outdoor sex
Phone sex (serving Dom)
Phone sex (serving Dom’s friends)
Prison scenes
Pony slave
Public exposure
Pussy/cock whipping
Pussy worship
Riding crops
Riding the “horse” (crotch tort.)
Rituals
Religious scenes
Restrictive rules on behavior
Rubber/latex clothing
Rope body harness
Saran wrapping
Scratching – getting
Scratching – giving
Sensory deprivation
Serving
Serving as art
Serving as ashtray
Serving as furniture
Serving as a maid
Serving as toilet
Serving as waitress/waiter
Serving orally (sexual)
Serving other doms (supervised)
Piercing (temporary, play-pierce)
Piercing (permanant)
Serving other doms (unsupervised)
Sexual deprivation (short term)
Sexual deprivation (long term)
Shaving (body hair)
Shaving (head hair)
Sleep deprivation
Sleepsacks
Slutty clothing (private)
Slutty clothing (public)
Spanking
Spandex clothing
Speech restrictions (when, what)
Speculums (Anal)
Speculums (vaginal)
Spreader bars
Standing in corner
Stocks
Straight jackets
Strap-on-dildos (sucking on)
Strap-on-dildos (penetrated by)
Strap-on-dildos (wearing)
Strapping (full body beating)
Suspension (upright)
Suspension (inverted)
Suspension (horizontal)
Supplying new partners for Dom
Swallowing semen
Swallowing urine
Swapping (with one other couple)
Swinging (multiple couples)
Tattooing
Teasing
Tickling
Triple penetration
Uniforms
Including others
Vaginal dildo
Verbal humiliation
Vibrator on genitals
Voyeurism (watching others)
Voyeurism (your Dom w/others)
Video (watching others)
Video (recordings of you)
Water torture
Wearing symbolic jewelery
Whipping
Wooden paddles
Wrestling

Article MissBonnie © CollarNcuffs.com

Further reading:
D/s Contracts – What are D/s contracts? and how do D/s contracts work?
Contract Sample 1 – An example of a simple D/s contract.
Contract Sample 2 – A more complicated example of a M/s contract
Contract Sample 3 – An example of a temporary BDSM poly contract.
BDSM Rights – Know your rights with a Femdom relationship
Safewords – Do you know your safe word with your Mistress/submissive?
SSC v’s RACK – Safe, sane and consensual V’s Risk-Aware Consensual Kink
Limits & negotiations – Both Dominants and submissives can express limits. What are your partners?
Abuse and P.E – Abuse and erotic power exchange, know the dangers.
Explicit Implicit – Explicit Consent / Implicit consent Play considerately and consensually.

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