Exploring the World of Butt Plugs: A Comprehensive Guide for All Users

What is a Butt Plug?

A butt plug is a type of sexual toy specifically designed to be inserted into the rectum for pleasure. Its primary function is to provide stimulation to the anal area, enhancing sexual experiences for both individuals and couples. The design of a butt plug typically includes a tapered tip for easier insertion, a bulbous body for pleasurable sensation, and a flared base to prevent the plug from being fully inserted, thereby ensuring safety during use.

The variety of butt plugs available on the market reflects the diverse preferences among users. They come in a range of shapes, sizes, and materials. For instance, some butt plugs are small and discreet, designed for beginners who may be new to anal play. Others are larger or have unique shapes, such as those that vibrate or feature interesting textures for added stimulation. Materials used in butt plug manufacturing vary widely, including silicone, glass, metal, or rubber, each offering distinct sensations and levels of comfort.

There are so so many butt plugs to choose from.
Vibrating, Thrusting, Curved for p-spot play, Plugs with animal tails, Jeweled or decorative plugs, Hollow plugs, Inflatable plugs, Phallic plugs (human, animal, or fantasy), Glow-in-the-dark plugs, Electric plugs, Suction cup plugs
While this list covers most of the butt plugs on the market, there are always unique toys. For example, some butt plugs are also floggers. When using them for impact play, you use the shaft of the toy as a handle. You’ll even find some novelty butt plugs I recently purchased a 3d printed plug of my submissive in miniature. Gives the whole saying “go fuck yourself” a whole (or is that hole) new meaning!. Basically, you’ve got plenty of options when it comes to butt plugs. I’ve found the different shapes and sizes are great for building scene ideas around. different plug shapes can also create different head spaces for submissives using them.

This diverse selection allows users to find a product that suits their individual preferences, whether they are seeking a gentle introduction to anal play or something more adventurous. It is essential to choose a butt plug that resonates with one’s comfort level, as proper sizing and material choice can significantly enhance the experience. Additionally, it is advisable to use lubricant when inserting a butt plug to ensure smooth and pleasurable use. Overall, the world of butt plugs is expansive, catering to various needs and desires for all users interested in exploring this aspect of sexual pleasure.

The easiest answer is to provide pleasurable anal stimulation. However, there are specific reasons or aspects of using a butt plug that appeal to some people.

Spicing up the every day or play – people like using butt plugs because they’ve novel, and some especially like the taboo of anal play or that they can be instructed to wear butt plugs in public. some love the thrill of nobody knowing knowing.
Pleasurable stimulation – using a butt plug can feel good because it’s filling or pushing on the prostate. Some people can have anal orgasms while using a butt plug! we have several resources on how to achieve this!
Femdom punishment – butt plugs can be used as a form of punishment or correction, especially if they’re large and/or uncomfortable.
Anal training – you can train your anus to take larger toys through anal training, which is done both for its own sake and to prepare for anal sex. Yes, it can hurt, but it shouldn’t. This is especially true if you’re properly prepared.
Role play – butt plugs with animal tails can function like costumes during role play, especially during pet play.

Benefits of Using a Butt Plug

Incorporating butt plugs into one’s sexual experience can offer a multitude of advantages that enhance pleasure during both solo and partnered play. Butt plugs are designed to stimulate the sensitive nerve endings located in the anal area, which can significantly increase arousal and intensity during sexual activities. Many users find that the presence of a butt plug during intercourse intensifies pleasure, as it adds an additional layer of stimulation that complements vaginal or penile penetration.

One of the primary benefits of using a butt plug is the potential for enhanced orgasms. The stimulation created by a well-placed butt plug can lead to stronger and more fulfilling climaxes.

Many individuals report experiencing more powerful orgasms due to the dual stimulation provided by butt plugs, especially when combined with other forms of sexual activity. This heightened sexual pleasure can also lead to increased feelings of satisfaction and intimacy between partners.

Moreover, butt plugs serve as an excellent introduction to anal play for those who may be hesitant or unsure about exploring this area. They can help users become accustomed to sensations and sensations associated with anal stimulation. By gradually working up to larger sizes and different shapes of butt plugs, individuals can gain more confidence in their bodies and their comfort levels regarding anal intimacy, making future experiences more enjoyable.

In conclusion, the benefits of using butt plugs extend beyond mere novelty; they can significantly enhance pleasure, lead to more intense orgasms, and serve as a gateway for exploring anal play. As users unlock new dimensions of sexual enjoyment, butt plugs can become valuable tools in the journey of personal and shared discovery.

Safety Measures for Using a Butt Plug

When engaging with butt plugs, safety should always be a top priority. First and foremost, it is essential to select products made from body-safe materials. These materials, such as silicone, glass, or stainless steel, are non-porous and easy to clean, significantly reducing the risk of irritation or infections. Avoid products containing harmful substances, such as phthalates and other toxic chemicals, which can pose health risks. Researching the manufacturer’s reputation and product reviews can also help ensure a safe choice.

Another critical safety measure is ensuring that the butt plug has a flared base. This feature is crucial for preventing the plug from becoming fully inserted, which could lead to potential emergencies for the user. The flared base acts as a stopper, allowing the user to retrieve the toy easily while providing a sense of security during use. Choosing a size that you are comfortable with is also essential, as starting with a larger toy can result in discomfort and complications.

Hygiene practices play a significant role in the safe use of butt plugs. Prior to and after each use, the plug should be thoroughly cleaned with warm water and mild soap or a dedicated sex toy cleaner. This cleaning procedure ensures that harmful bacteria do not compromise overall health. Additionally, it is advisable to use a lubricant designed for anal play to facilitate smooth insertion and enhance comfort during use. Water-based or silicone-based lubricants are commonly recommended.

Using a butt plug for the first time may seem daunting but with the right information, you will likely enjoy your experience. Communication is key. If you’re experiencing anal play with a partner(s), be sure to talk things out prior to and during butt plug insertion. If the toy feels uncomfortable or your partner is going too fast, you need to be able to communicate your needs clearly at the moment.

Lastly, recognizing personal limits and communicating with partners about comfort levels is vital. Users should listen to their bodies throughout the experience, and if discomfort or pain arises, it is important to stop immediately. Patience is key when exploring anal play, and gradually increasing comfort with butt plugs can lead to enjoyable experiences without compromising safety. By adhering to these guidelines, users can ensure a safer and more pleasurable experience with butt plugs.

Using Butt Plugs in Femdom Scenes

Integrating butt plugs into femdom scenarios can significantly enhance the dynamics of power exchange between partners. Within the realm of BDSM, butt plugs serve as tools for creating a sense of submission and control. For many submissives, the act of having a butt plug inserted can symbolize a surrender of autonomy, thereby deepening the overall experience of the scene. Dominants often use these devices to assert their will while also providing physical stimulation to enhance pleasure.

When incorporating butt plugs into femdom scenes, an essential first step is open communication. Discussing preferences, boundaries, and safe words prior to engagement ensures that both parties are aligned in their expectations. This dialogue not only lays the groundwork for a successful scene but also fosters trust, a critical element in any BDSM relationship. A dominant may introduce the idea of using a butt plug gradually, explaining its intended purpose and soliciting the submissive’s feelings about its use. This approach reinforces the importance of consent in all practices within the BDSM community.

Once the submissive is comfortable with the idea, the actual introduction of the butt plug can be approached with care and consideration. It is vital to select a plug that is both safe and suitable for the submissive’s experience level.

Beginners may prefer smaller, tapered designs, while more experienced users might opt for larger or more intricate shapes.

The application of lubrication is also crucial to ensure a comfortable experience. Additionally, during the scene, the dominant should continually check in with the submissive to gauge comfort levels, allowing for adjustments as needed.

Finally, aftercare is a fundamental element when incorporating butt plugs into femdom scenes. Aftercare provides an opportunity to connect, helping both partners transition back to their regular dynamics. This can include physical care, emotional reassurance, or simply cuddling, reinforcing the bond and trust built during the scene. By prioritizing communication, consent, and aftercare, couples can create rewarding and fulfilling femdom experiences centered around the exciting incorporation of butt plugs.

Choosing the Right Butt Plug for Male Submissives

When selecting a butt plug tailored for male submissives, several factors should be taken into account to enhance the overall experience. One of the primary considerations is the size of the butt plug. For beginners, it is advisable to start with a smaller plug to allow for gradual adjustment. A smaller plug, ranging from 1 to 3 inches in diameter, not only eases the initial entry but also provides an opportunity to gauge comfort levels. As users become more accustomed, they may explore larger sizes for increased satisfaction and fullness.

The shape of the butt plug is another critical element that can significantly affect pleasure. Preferences can vary widely, but plugs designed with a tapered tip allow for easier insertion, making them a popular choice. Additionally, butt plugs that feature a flared base are essential for safety, ensuring that the plug does not get lost internally.

Insist it has a flared base – The most important way to avoid this uncomfortable, awkward, and expensive trip to the doctor is to always choose anal toys with a flared base or handle. The base should be noticeably wider than the stem/neck. Otherwise, your anus could swallow it right up! This is actually why it’s a bad idea to insert anything just because it fits. In fact make this a rule! There are way to many anal accidents

Narrow neck – A narrow neck also ensures that the butt plug sits in place. If the neck isn’t narrow enough for the size of the shaft, the plug might slide out because your anus can’t close enough. Similarly, make sure the neck is long enough to let your anal sphincter close around it as much as possible. This isn’t a safety issue necessarily, but it can be annoying if you have a plug that falls out when you move.

Make sure it can’t break – While this should be common sense it often isn’t! avoid any toys with rough edges or items that could break off. Be careful with glass butt plugs that have looped handles, which could be more susceptible to breaking than other bases.

Furthermore, some plugs come equipped with features specifically designed to enhance prostate stimulation. These typically have a curved design or an extended arm that targets the prostate gland effectively, leading to heightened sensations during use.

Material is also paramount when choosing the right butt plug. Many options are available, including silicone, glass, and stainless steel, each offering unique sensations and ease of cleaning. Silicone is particularly popular due to its flexibility and comfort; moreover, it is body-safe and non-porous. However, some users may prefer the firm feel of glass or metal, which can provide a different type of stimulation. Ultimately, experimenting with various materials may help male submissives discover their personal preferences for a more pleasurable experience.

Prior to getting slowly rammed or filled by a toy or plug, it’s important to experiment with something smaller like a finger. Lube up your finger or ask your Dominant to help you out. Circle your anus with the finger and then slowly and gently guide it in. Once you’re able to comfortably put a couple of fingers in your butt, you may be able to go further by lathering up your butt plug and slowly putting it inside you. The key to any butt play is relaxation.
You never want to try anything too big right away without deep breathing and relaxing (and inching your way up to a small butt plug). Take your time and do things at your pace.

Finally, it is essential to consider the use of lubrication. An appropriate water-based or silicone-based lubricant can significantly enhance comfort during insertion and use. Adequate lubrication helps in achieving a frictionless experience, making exploration more enjoyable. By considering these factors—size, shape, material, and lubrication—male submissives can find the perfect butt plug to suit their individual needs and preferences.

The Importance of Lube in Anal Play

Lubrication is paramount when engaging in anal play, especially when using butt plugs. The anus does not produce its own lubrication, making it essential to use a quality lubricant to ensure comfort and safety. Without sufficient lubrication, friction can cause discomfort or even injury during the insertion or removal of butt plugs, making the experience less enjoyable or potentially hazardous.

Remember my Anal mantra
“Communication, lubrication, and relaxation.”

When it comes to choosing the right type of lubricant for anal play, there are three primary categories to consider: water-based, silicone-based, and oil-based lubes. Water-based lubricants are versatile and easy to clean up, making them a popular choice. They are safe to use with all types of butt plugs, including those made of silicone. However, they may require reapplication during play, especially with prolonged use.

Silicone-based lubricants, on the other hand, provide a longer-lasting glide and greater slickness. They are an excellent option for anal play as they reduce friction effectively. However, caution is advised when pairing silicone lubes with silicone toys, as they can degrade the material over time. It is essential to check the manufacturer’s guidelines to ensure compatibility.

Oil-based lubes offer a rich and smooth experience, but they come with their set of limitations. They can break down latex condoms and may be more challenging to clean from both skin and toys. Users should also note that oil-based lubricants are not compatible with silicone toys, limiting their options when selecting butt plugs.

The recommended amount of lubricant varies based on personal preference, but a generous application is often necessary to enhance comfort and pleasure. Ultimately, the right lubricant can significantly improve the overall experience of anal play, making it an essential consideration for any user of butt plugs.

Size Considerations: Does Size Matter?

When considering the use of butt plugs, the size of the device can significantly impact the user’s experience. The debate regarding whether size matters is subjective, as preferences vary among individuals. Factors such as anatomy, comfort, and experience level play crucial roles in determining the appropriate size for each person.

For beginners, opting for smaller sizes is advisable. A slim or petite butt plug can provide an introductory experience that allows users to become acclimated to the sensation without overwhelming discomfort. This gradual approach not only fosters positive associations with anal play but also minimizes the risk of injury. For these users, a diameter of 1 to 1.5 inches is often ideal, as it allows for the exploration of different sensations whilst maintaining a sense of control.

Conversely, advanced users may prefer larger sizes, which can lead to more intense sensations or even deeper stimulation. Many experienced users often recommend larger plugs, typically exceeding 1.5 inches in diameter, as they are more familiar with their own body’s responses. There is also an emphasis on the necessity of listening to one’s body during this progression. Individuals should never push beyond their comfort levels, as this can create negative experiences that deter future exploration.

Ultimately, the importance of gradual progression cannot be overstated. Users are encouraged to invest time in experimenting with various sizes before committing to larger options. This method not only helps in achieving comfort but also fosters a deeper understanding of personal preferences. While size may hold significance in the realm of butt plugs, personalization and comfort should remain paramount in every user’s journey towards exploration and satisfaction.

Preparation

Like any backdoor play, butt plugs can require a little preparation. It goes without saying that if your GI system doesn’t feel great (gas, loose or compacted stools, etc.), inserting a butt plug is probably a bad idea! Similarly, the friction from anal play can make hemorrhoids worse , so it’s best to wait until they’re healed if you are suffering from them.Your butt isn’t going anywhere, play can always be left to another day.

Having a clean bowel movement is usually a sign that you’re good to go with a butt plug. Using wet wipes or showering after your bowel movement can give you additional peace of mind. You don’t generally need to use an anal douche or enema, although you could if you really wanted to be squeaky clean.

Similarly, you don’t need to shave, but you might want to or dominant requires it. Asking never hurts. If your hair is especially long, it could potentially catch on a butt plug, not to mention catch debris that you’d rather not deal with during play.

What Position should the submissive be in

You can pretty much use a butt plug in any position where ther backside is exposed. But some positions might be more comfortable or be easier to insert a plug, especially if you’re going solo. The following positions are all good options when playing with a butt plug.

Doggy style
On their back with knees pulled to chest
Squatting
On your side with the knee of your top leg pulled to your chest. This has more intimate feel to it.

Safety matters with a Butt Plug

You can safely wear a butt plug for two to three hours. Longer works, but experts recommend for safety a three hour window. However, you should work your way up to that. Start by wearing it for just a few minutes. You can do this while you’re alone if you want to eventually use a butt plug during sex.

If you’re comfortable, try doubling the amount of time you’re wearing a butt plug. It’s okay if you cannot comfortably wear the butt plug for a full three hours. You can put in a butt plug right before masturbation or partner sex and take it out immediately after.

Some people do go beyond three hours, even wearing a butt plug all day. You can try using a butt plug for longer than three hours but should slowly increase the time. Stop using a butt plug as soon as you notice any tenderness or injuries.

Can you sleep with a butt plug?

It’s definitely best not to try this. Unless you’re an incredibly short sleeper, you spend far more time sleeping than it is safe to wear a butt plug. On top of that, you won’t be able to tell if something goes wrong if you’re asleep.

How can I make using a butt plug more comfortable?

Here are some butt plug tips that can help.

If the discomfort is mostly internal, try a smaller plug or one that’s shorter or contoured instead of straight. A “poky” or “stabby” sensation may be due to a sharp point at the end of a plug: try a more rounded design instead.

For plugs that are curved or angled, turning them might be more comfortable–or even feel good! Careful you don’t want to feel to comfortable, your Mistress may not like that!

The base of a butt plug can also be an issue. Many are rectangular, which may not be the most comfortable. Try a toy with a longer neck or rounded base. Another tip is wearing underwear over the plug to keep it in or some like to wear a G string!

A base that’s much longer than it is wide might feel much better if you wear it between your cheeks (up and down). Some people describe these as T-bar butt plugs. Bases that look like anchors–longer, narrow, and curved–are often more comfortable than wider or rectangular bases.

Are mentally ready. If you’re at all unsure about whether you want anal, you’re probably going to tense up. Tense muscles will make penetration more difficult and painful, which leads to the very thing you were worried about to begin with.

So you need to be mentally relaxed, allowing your body to relax physically. For some people, a glass of wine might do the trick for others with SSC bases, alcohol might be a HUGE no for some Dommes. For myself I don’t like any alcohol in play as I believe in CLEAR consent.

Room temp can also have a lot to do with relaxation. Make sure your not overheating or freezing cold. Still not relaxed ask your partner if you both talk through this. Nowhere does it state anal play needs to be silent!

Numbing Products: There are a few options to consider. For example, numbing creams designed for anal sex promise to take away any potential pain with the use of lidocaine or similar chemicals. But what the product packaging doesn’t tell you is that pain can be useful. It’s your body’s way of saying “Slow down,” “Relax,” “Use more lube,” or “Try a different angle.” Pain is a message that you should heed.

If you numb pain, you won’t know that anything is wrong. If you ignore it, you can similarly wind up doing damage. For example, anal play that’s too rough could lead to anal prolapse and incontinence. If you use a toy that’s too big, you could cause trauma to your colon. Not only is that pain more long-term, but the visit to the doctor is also going to be uncomfortable.

Are you sure your heads in the right place when it comes to Anal play and butt plugs? Could this be your issue and causing discomfort?

Common Misconceptions About Butt Plugs

Butt plugs have garnered a reputation often marred by misconceptions and stereotypes. One prevalent myth is the assumption that the use of butt plugs inherently involves pain. In reality, when introduced and used correctly, butt plugs can provide a pleasurable experience, enhancing overall sexual enjoyment. Users should start with smaller sizes that match their comfort levels and utilize plenty of lubricant, which greatly reduces the chances of discomfort during usage.

Another common misconception is that butt plugs are exclusively for anal sex. While they can certainly be utilized within that context, their application extends well beyond. Individuals can enjoy butt plugs as part of solo play or incorporate them into a variety of sexual encounters. Furthermore, many users appreciate the unique sensations that butt plugs can provide, which may intensify orgasms or offer delightful new experiences regardless of their sexual orientation or preference.

Furthermore, societal stereotypes suggest that butt plugs are only suited for specific demographics, primarily within the context of the LGBTQ+ community or those identified as “kinky.” This stereotype is misleading and excludes a broader audience who might find pleasure in these devices. In recent years, butt plugs have become more accepted across diverse user groups, including heterosexual couples, individuals exploring their bodies, and those simply looking to enhance their intimate experiences.

Such myths about butt plugs and BDSM often foster unnecessary stigma, preventing individuals from exploring a safe and potentially pleasurable avenue of self-exploration. By addressing these misconceptions openly, we can normalize the use of butt plugs and Femdom play, encouraging diverse acceptance and a broader understanding that enhances enjoyment across all sexual preferences.

Aftercare: Caring for Yourself and Your Plug

Aftercare is a crucial aspect of butt plug use that ensures not only the well-being of the individual but also extends the longevity of the plug itself. Following the use of a butt plug, it is essential to engage in proper aftercare practices that address both emotional and physical aspects. Aftercare can help partners reconnect and foster intimacy, which is particularly important after exploring anal pleasure. Taking the time for gentle physical contact, such as cuddling or light massage, can help in transitioning back to a relaxed state, reinforcing trust between partners.

From a physical standpoint, aftercare involves being mindful of one’s body. It is advisable to listen to oneself and communicate openly with one’s partner about any discomfort or feelings experienced after the use of a butt plug. Hydration plays a crucial role in recovery, particularly if lubricants were used during the activity. Drinking water can help flush out any chemicals absorbed during use, ensuring a comfortable experience. Additionally, consider engaging in light stretching or yoga, which can help ease any tension that may have arisen during the session.

Equally vital is the proper cleaning and storage of the butt plug to maintain hygiene for future use. It is recommended to clean the plug promptly after use, utilizing warm water and a mild, antibacterial soap. For silicone or glass plugs, a thorough rinse is sufficient, while those made from other materials may require specific cleaning methods. After cleaning, ensure the plug is completely dry before storing it in a dedicated case or pouch, away from direct sunlight and extremes of temperature. Proper aftercare extends the life of your toy and promotes safe practices, ensuring that future experiences are equally enjoyable and worry-free.

Your still here..I thought you’d off exploring Anal play….ok want some ideas?

Anal play Scene Ideas

Make you submissive wear a butt plug for up to three hours work. Yep that’s right. ok make sure he builds up to this. An idea that works for some is slip a zip lock bag into your work bag. When its too much excuse yourself to the bathroom. Remove and store in the zip lock bag. In the morning after breakfast, order him to insert the plug into his little sissy hole. Then, send him off to work!

other additional ideas could be: throughout the day he MUST send picture and video proof that he hasn’t taken the plug out. During his lunch break, order him to go into the bathroom and rape his ass with the plug! There needs to be a funny video to accompany this too for your amusement. When he comes home from work, make him beg on his knees to take the plug out. Tease him for a bit by saying “oh I don’t know.” – really make him beg for it!

Couldn’t go the whole three hour safety period? What punishments’ will you issue? Went longer than the hour last time he tried. Do you need to reward him for going longer? Or punish him for following your explicit instructions to remove within a set time frame.

Control at dinner

Next time you go out on a date at a restaurant, take the plug out of your purse at the table. A vibe plug works best for this idea. Order him to go into the bathroom and insert the plug. Throughout dinner, turn the butt plug on while he’s eating and ordering food from the waiter/waitress. Prior to this idea a good idea is check for sound while at home. Never involve unconsenting others in your kink. What about in chastity too, so the vibrations will be even more of a tease!

Oh and a fun game to play is to make him take a sip of a drink whenever you turn on the butt plug.

By the end of the night he’ll be super frustrated in his chastity cage while plugged up! And if you want to take things to the next level, try to make him cum in his pants or panties like this.

Milk him in chastity

A butt plug is a great way to milk him too. Here’s what I want you to do…Order him to present his ass to you. Put a little lube on the plug and then insert it into his pretty little ass. After that, order him to lie on his back with his knees on his chest.

You’ll turn on the vibrating butt plug with the remote. In addition, you’ll take your fingers and slowly knead/squeeze his balls between your hand. Between your fingers and the vibrations of the plugs, he’ll blow his little load in no time – despite being locked in chastity! And because he’s locked in chastity, the orgasm will be super frustrating!

Want it more humiliating, make him suck on your dildo while you’re doing so!

If hes cucked get someone else to control the remote

Next time your bull is over, give him the remote control to cuck’s vibrating butt plug. Allow him to control your cuck with it. How humiliating is that? The man fucking his wife will now literally be controlling his ass haha!

Here are some fun ideas: Tell your bull to turn on cuck’s plug while he’s fucking you! Give bull the remote while you’re at the restaurant and have him turn it on while you two are kissing!

Hot and Cold

The final technique for using a butt plug you might want to try is temperature play. You can either place the plug into a bowl of cool or hot water (never microwave it, which could cause burns!) or apply warming or cooling lube. If you’ve never used the lube before, test it out before slathering a butt plug with it.

Resource Article: MissBonnie 2024

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How to Insert a Butt Plug with a Male Submissive: A Femdom Beginner’s Guide

Introduction: The Journey into Anal Discovery

Welcome to the exciting world of anal play! This exploration promises a plethora of unique sensations that captivate beginners and experienced enthusiasts alike. The appeal of anal pleasure is truly universal, offering an intriguing layer to intimate experiences that can be deeply gratifying for those who embrace it. By understanding and appreciating the fundamentals, one can unlock a new dimension of sexual expression and connection.

Butt plugs, in particular, play a pivotal role in this explorative journey. These versatile tools are designed to cater to various preferences and levels of experience with their diverse range of sizes, shapes, and materials. From small, beginner-friendly plugs to more substantial options for seasoned players, each butt plug serves a distinct purpose in both internal and external stimulation. They can be made from a variety of materials such as silicone, glass, metal, or even soft rubber, each offering a unique tactile experience.

The use of a butt plug can enhance the overall experience of anal play, introducing a sense of fullness and a teasing pressure against erogenous zones. This sensation is often described as both stimulating and satisfying, allowing individuals to embark on a personal journey of discovery that not only deepens physical pleasure but also strengthens emotional intimacy.

This guide aims to demystify the use of butt plugs within the context of a femdom relationship, focusing specifically on the dynamics between a dominant female and a male submissive partner. Whether you are new to this realm or looking to deepen your understanding, this resource is crafted to support and encourage a safe, consensual, and pleasurable experience for all involved. Dive in, and embrace the potential of anal play as you explore new horizons of intimate connection.

Why Use a Butt Plug?

Butt plugs offer a multifaceted array of benefits that are especially pronounced within the dynamic of a femdom relationship, catering to both physiological and psychological dimensions of pleasure. Physiologically, the insertion of a butt plug can significantly stimulate the sensitive nerve endings located in the rectal area. This stimulation not only generates pleasure but can also amplify the sensations in other erogenous zones, thus enhancing the overall sexual experience.

In the context of a male submissive, the use of a butt plug carries profound psychological implications. It serves as a tangible symbol of submission and acquiescence to the dominant partner’s will. This act reinforces the power dynamics inherent in a femdom relationship, where the male submissive not only experiences physical pleasure but also a heightened sense of psychological release and fulfillment through acts of submission.

Furthermore, butt plugs can significantly enrich both solo and partnered sexual endeavors. For solo play, a male submissive may use a butt plug to prolong arousal and explore new dimensions of self-pleasure. When incorporated into partnered activities, it can deepen intimacy and trust, as the submissive places their body and its responses under the dominion of their partner. This trust fosters a more profound emotional connection, enhancing the overall relationship.

Moreover, butt plugs can be strategically incorporated into a broader sexual training regimen. Over time, the submissive may be trained to accommodate larger sizes or extended wear, amplifying the sensation of control and submission. This progressive practice not only intensifies physical pleasure but also deepens psychological bonds, serving as a powerful tool in the sexual and relational training of a male submissive in a femdom dynamic.

Overall, the integration of butt plugs within a femdom relationship serves to enhance the physical pleasures of intimacy, while simultaneously strengthening the psychological aspects of submission and trust. It is an essential tool for those looking to explore and deepen their power exchange dynamics.

Choosing the Right Butt Plug

Selecting the appropriate butt plug is a crucial step in ensuring a pleasurable and safe experience for both participants. When determined to introduce this element into your practice, several factors should be taken into consideration to choose the most suitable butt plug.

Firstly, size is paramount. Beginners should start with smaller sizes to allow the body to acclimate gradually. A butt plug that is too large can cause discomfort or even injury, hence it’s recommended to begin with plugs designed specifically for novices, which are generally narrower and have a tapered shape for easy insertion.

Shape is another vital aspect. Tapered plugs with a gradual increase in width are preferable for beginners, providing ease in insertion and removal. As comfort with the process increases, you may explore other shapes like bulbous or ridged designs that offer varied sensations.

The material of the butt plug is also significant. Medical-grade silicone is highly recommended due to its non-porous nature, softness, and ease of cleaning. Other materials, such as glass or stainless steel, while luxurious, might be heavy and less forgiving for novices. Ensure the chosen material is body-safe to prevent potential allergic reactions or infections.

Safety features like flared bases are non-negotiable when selecting a butt plug. The flared base prevents the plug from being fully drawn into the anal cavity, thereby averting any possible medical emergencies. A visible base also allows for easy retrieval, adding a layer of security in play.

For beginners, it’s prudent to invest in sets that offer a range of sizes. This allows a progressive increase in size and complexity, aligning with growing comfort and confidence. Always use a generous amount of water-based lubricant to ensure smooth insertion, reduce friction, and enhance the overall experience.

A thoughtful selection that takes into account these factors will set the stage for a safe, enjoyable, and mutually gratifying exploration of this intimate element in femdom play.

Preparation is essential for ensuring a pleasurable and safe anal play experience, particularly when introducing a butt plug to a male submissive partner. Central to this preparation is consent and communication. Open conversations about boundaries, desires, and comfort levels must be prioritized. Both partners should feel mutually assured and comfortable with the forthcoming activity, which fosters trust and enhances the overall experience.

Psychological preparation of the submissive partner is equally significant. Engaging in a dialogue that delves into any anxieties or concerns helps establish a sense of security. Implanting a sense of anticipation rather than trepidation can be achieved by reassuring the submissive partner and detailing each step of the process. This builds a psychological foundation that is conducive to a gratifying experience.

The physical setting plays a pivotal role as well. Maintaining stringent hygiene practices is crucial. Both partners should be thoroughly clean, and the butt plug must be sanitized before use to prevent any risk of infection. The application of a high-quality, water-based lubricant is indispensable to minimize friction and enhance comfort. Proper lubrication ensures a smoother and more pleasurable insertion.

Creating a relaxed and comfortable atmosphere further assists in easing the introduction of the butt plug. Soft lighting, calming music, and a warm environment can help alleviate any tension. Comfort extends to physical positions as well; the submissive partner should be in a comfortable and relaxed stance that aligns with their preferences.

By meticulously addressing consent, psychological preparedness, hygiene, and atmosphere, the experience is set for optimal pleasure and safety. Effective preparation ensures not only a gratifying initial experience but also sets a positive precedent for future explorations in anal play.

How to Insert and Use a Butt Plug

Inserting a butt plug correctly involves careful preparation and attentiveness to ensure a comfortable and rewarding experience for both participants. Here, we outline a step-by-step process to guide you through this intimate activity with a male submissive, emphasizing thoroughness and safety at every stage.

First and foremost, ensure that you and your partner are in a relaxed and consensual state. Consent and trust are foundational to any BDSM activity, including the use of butt plugs. Begin by gathering necessary materials: a clean, body-safe butt plug, ample lubrication, and perhaps some relaxing music or low lighting to set a comfortable tone.

To initiate the process, apply a generous amount of water-based or silicone-based lube to both the butt plug and the submissive’s anus. Lubrication is crucial to reduce friction and facilitate smooth insertion, minimizing discomfort. Encourage your submissive to take slow, deep breaths to help relax their muscles and reduce tension.

Start by gently inserting a finger, or a smaller toy if available, to gradually ease the submissive’s body into accepting the plug. This step is important for stretching the sphincter muscles and making the insertion more comfortable. Always pay close attention to your partner’s verbal and non-verbal cues, proceeding only if they are comfortable.

Next, slowly insert the butt plug, applying gentle pressure while maintaining a steady pace. Avoid any sharp or sudden movements to prevent injury. If the submissive expresses discomfort, pause, and allow them time to adjust before continuing. The key is patience; rushing can cause pain and disrupt the trust built between you.

Once the plug is inserted, you can incorporate it into other sexual activities as desired. Engage in gentle movements to help the submissive become accustomed to the sensation. Over time, you may increase the intensity, always monitoring their reactions and maintaining open communication.

Finally, ensure the butt plug is securely in place to prevent any accidental displacement. When it’s time to remove the plug, apply lubrication again if necessary, and extract it slowly, mirroring the careful and gradual method of insertion.

Adhering to these guidelines will contribute to a safe and pleasurable experience, enhancing the bond between you and your submissive. Remember, the core of any femdom activity is mutual respect, comfort, and shared enjoyment.

Enjoying the Experience: Activities and Stimulation

Upon successfully inserting a butt plug, there are myriad ways to amplify the overall experience for a male submissive. The additional stimulation can transform the act from merely inserting a plug into an exhilarating and deeply gratifying encounter. A versatile range of activities and external stimulation can significantly enhance the pleasure and intensity of the experience.

Rimming is a commonly favored activity that can complement the sensation of a butt plug. By using the tongue to stimulate the anus, it can create a layered erotic experience. Rimming serves to both relax and excite, preparing the body for more profound pleasures. Simultaneously, it adds a sensorial richness that can be incredibly euphoric for the submissive partner.

Perineum play is another effective method to heighten excitement. The perineum, often referred to as the ‘taint’ or ‘gooch,’ is an extremely sensitive area located between the anus and the genitals. Gentle fingering, massaging, or even using a small vibrating device on this area can create waves of pleasure that reverberate through the body, working in tandem with the sensations induced by the butt plug.

Incorporating other sex toys or activities can further elevate the experience. Vibrators, strokers, or even nipple clamps can be introduced to further diversify the range of sensations. Using a remote-controlled vibrating butt plug while engaging in other forms of play can lead to heightened anticipation and excitement. Creating a multi-sensory experience ensures that the submissive’s focus is dispersed over multiple points of pleasure, contributing to a more intense and satisfying session.

Gradual escalation in the intensity and variety of these activities can lead to profound levels of pleasure. Begin with softer, less intense stimulation and slowly build up to more vigorous actions. This approach allows the male submissive’s body to acclimate and derive maximum pleasure without crossing into discomfort. Additionally, continuous communication is paramount; keeping an open dialogue helps to maintain an enjoyable, consensual experience, ensuring that each activity aligns with mutual comfort levels and desires.

Removing the Butt Plug and Post-Care

Proper removal of a butt plug is equally crucial as its insertion, ensuring the safety and comfort of the submissive partner. The process should be approached with the same level of patience and communication. To begin with, it’s advised to apply some additional lubricant around the base of the butt plug to facilitate smoother removal. Similar to the initial insertion, encourage your submissive partner to relax and take deep, calming breaths.

Gently grasp the base of the butt plug and slowly twist it while gradually pulling it out. This technique helps in easing the plug out without causing any discomfort or injury. It’s important to be attentive to your partner’s reactions during this process, stopping if there is any sign of pain or distress to reassess and alleviate the situation. Slow and gentle movements are key to a successful and comfortable removal.

Once the butt plug is fully removed, immediate post-care steps should be taken to maintain hygiene and comfort. Clean the plug thoroughly with warm water and an antibacterial cleaner to ensure that it is ready for future use. It is also crucial to pay attention to personal hygiene for both partners. The submissive partner should take time to cleanse the area with mild soap and water to prevent irritation or infection.

Emotional support and aftercare are essential components of a positive experience. Engaging in some form of nurturing behavior such as cuddling, providing reassuring words, or discussing the experience can help reinforce trust and emotional bonds. This practice is not just about physical care but also ensuring that both partners feel safe and valued.

Concluding the session with care and affection not only enhances the immediate experience but also builds a stronger, more supportive relationship moving forward. By incorporating these steps, you can ensure that the session ends on a positive note, encouraging both partners to engage again confidently and willingly in the future.

Conclusion: Embracing Anal Exploration

In conclusion, the journey of anal exploration, especially when involving the use of butt plugs with a male submissive, is an intricate dance of trust, communication, and mutual consent. Approaching this realm of sexual discovery with the right mindset can transform the experience into a profoundly rewarding one, fostering deeper intimacy and understanding between partners.

Throughout this guide, we have highlighted the significance of preparation, lubrication, and relaxation to ensure a comfortable and pleasurable experience for both parties. The importance of choosing the right butt plug, maintaining open communication, and understanding body signals cannot be overstated. These steps are essential in creating a safe and enjoyable environment for anal play.

It is crucial to acknowledge that every individual’s journey with anal play is unique. The pace at which you and your partner progress should be dictated by your levels of comfort and excitement. There is no rush; taking the time to explore each sensation and boundary enhances the overall experience. This goes for BOTH sides of the relationship.

Furthermore, the emotional connection and trust developed through such intimate acts can be immensely beneficial for your relationship. The willingness to explore new territories together, while respecting each other’s limits and desires, reinforces the bond and opens pathways to new forms of sexual expression.

As you continue to delve into the world of anal exploration, remember that the ultimate goal is mutual pleasure and satisfaction. By approaching each step with care, patience, and a playful attitude, the use of butt plugs can become a cherished aspect of your sexual repertoire. Embrace this journey with enthusiasm, and let the experience of anal play enrich your connection and sexual satisfaction.

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Strap on Harness

What the hell is a harness? What type is the best for Femdom and pegging? So your partner has said he wants you to use a harness on him? Why does he want this? But I don’t know what to do ? Or where to start ?How do I use it?

Calm. Lets start at the beginning

How about we start at the beginning…take a breath We’ll help you, your not alone. Lets tackle your questions one by one. A strap-on dildo (also strap-on, dildo harness) is a dildo designed to be worn (usually in a harness) by one partner and used to penetrate another partner vaginally, anally or orally, used by both heterosexual and homosexual couples. For a woman, a strap-on can be used to anally penetrate a man (pegging), for vaginal or anal lesbian intercourse, or for artificial fellatio.

For a man, a strap-on can be worn for penetrative sex, and may be used in cases of erectile dysfunction, for double penetration, or to penetrate multiple partners. A wide variety of harnesses and dildos are available, with different ways of fitting the wearer, attaching the dildos, stimulating the wearer or the receiver, and all with different features, advantages, and drawbacks for both users.

The topic of anal pleasure is rarely openly spoken about. More than likely this is because any talk of anal pleasure tends to bring out feelings of embarrassment in most people (particularly men). Despite the hush hush on the subject, however, there is a growing interest to learn about the topic of anal pleasure. In this article I will go over various ways you can pleasure your lover anally. Both men and women can enjoy anal pleasure. You are probably aware of this but what you may not be aware of is that men and women enjoy anal pleasure for different reasons (physically speaking). Women enjoy anal pleasure because their is a wall of skin that is shared by their pussy and their rectum. Women’s sexual nerves are actually closer to this side of the wall than they are to the other side. Men enjoy anal pleasure because through their anus their prostate is stimulated.

Ok you have your willing partner, so our first step, is going to be, what harness your going to need ?

Harness come in may types, and shapes. grab a drink settle in and learn what is what. We have compiled a general list of harness with the idea you can find what most suits your needs.

The first part of a strap-on setup is the harness, which connects the dildo to the wearer’s body, usually in a position similar to that of a male’s genitals. A good harness should be sturdy yet comfortable, and is often designed to provide stimulation for the wearer. Many different types of harnesses are available, with different features and drawbacks, and which harness is best is often a matter of taste, as there is no one “right” answer. Some dildos do not need a harness or are built onto one; for these, please see the sections on dildo types and dildo attachment methods

2-strap harness

In its most basic form, is similar to a g-string. One strap goes around the wearer’s waist, like a belt, while the other goes between his/her legs and connects to the other strap in the middle at the lower back. While these are simple, many people find them uncomfortable because to the strap rubs against the anus and other areas, and they sometimes do not hold the dildo very firmly, causing it to sag, flop, or twist.

3-strap harnesses

also have one strap around the wearer’s waist, but instead of one strap between the legs, have two straps, one around each thigh, rejoining the first strap near the front. This design leaves the genitals and anus uncovered, and attaches the dildo much more firmly, giving the wearer more control. However, not all people find this design comfortable, and sometimes they are hard to make fit properly or tend to slip. 2 straps or 3? 3 straps or 4?- A variation on these designs, usually on harnesses which mount the dildo substantially lower (on or near the vaginal opening) rather than higher up, has a continual waistband that is not part of the dildo mount or backing, with a V-shaped pair of straps in the front, and either the single strap between the legs or the two straps around the thighs. The former of these is called a 3-strap, and the latter a 4-strap, however most of the aspects of their design and use (such as a strap over the anus, etc) are the same as 2-strap and 3-strap harnesses, respectively.

Other Harness types

Corsets and other clothing items- Strap-on harnesses built into various clothing items are available, most often as a corset or other item of lingerie. Some are designed to be worn underneath normal clothing for quick use (if done with the dildo in place, either to give the appearance of a penis or to be able to quickly initiate intercourse, this is sometimes called packing), while others take advantage of the additional strength and sturdiness an item of clothing can provide over a few straps, or just to integrate the strap-on into an erotic outfit. Thigh, Chin, and other locations- Harnesses are not limited to the crotch, and indeed many types are available for other body parts. A popular one is a thigh harness, which attaches a dildo to the wearer’s thigh (or other part of the legs or arms, though this is much less common), allowing for many unique positions, as penetration is no longer limited to what could be done with a penis. Another unusual design attaches a dildo to the chin of the wearer, allowing vaginal penetration while performing cunnilingus.

Furniture, beach balls, and other objects- Harnesses are available to attach dildos to just about any household object, allowing for many creative uses. A dildo could be attached to a chair, bed, or any other item of furniture, and penetrate someone during other activities, with or without a partner. Another item, while not technically a harness, but worth mentioning, is an inflatable ball, usually 9 to 18 inches (250 to 500 mm) diameter, made of sturdy rubber designed to support the weight of one or two people, with an attachment for a dildo on it. This allows many unique positions, such as double penetration for a woman by laying face down on the ball for vaginal penetration while her partner penetrates her anally doggy style, which is much more effective than a solid object due to the “bounce” of the ball. These inflatable balls are also quite popular for solo use.

materials

Harnesses are available in many different materials, and the choice of which to use depends greatly on individual preference.

Leather

Leather is generally considered the best material, and most professional harnesses use it. It is comfortable, adjusts to the wearer’s body, soft, and fits well, but still is strong and not prone to stretching during use. Leather may be slightly harder to clean and require a bit more work to take care of than other materials, however this is usually only a problem with very heavily used harnesses and while not as comfortable as leather, are often much more affordable and may be more durable than leather, as well as being easier to clean and not needing any maintenance.

Cloth

Cloth is used mostly for clothing harnesses such as corsets and other lingerie, although is occasionally used by extremely inexpensive harnesses, which are often uncomfortable or useless. Construction of lingerie harnesses is similar to most normal items of clothing, although they may use substantially thicker material to give the strength needed to support a dildo firmly. .Plastics- Some harnesses are made with soft plastic, such as flexible vinyl. These are often available in unique colors, such as completely transparent, which is not possible with other materials. The downside is they’re possibly less comfortable than other materials, and may be difficult to make fit well, however they tend to be very easy to clean and reasonably rugged.

Latex, rubber, and PVC

Latex harnesses usually cover the entire area, rather than just using straps. They tend to be medium-priced, and have a limited lifespan, especially if used with oil-based lubricants. Latex can require much care, such as special cleaners or shiners to keep it from turning dry and dusty. Latex harnesses may or may not have the dildo (s) molded as part of the harness, and in either case, they tend to be floppy due to the flexibility of the latex. Similar harnesses are also available made of rubber or PVC, and are similar to latex harnesses, although PVC tends to be much less flexible and elastic

Synthetics (Nylon, synthetic leather, foam)

Nylon webbing and soft foam-like synthetic leather are also common

OK still with us ?

So now you’ve chosen your harness type and material, next step is going to be what we use with it. So here we go again with the lists. The most noticeable feature of any strap-on setup is the dildo used. A wide variety of dildos are available, and while the choices may be limited by the type of harness in use, generally one can choose from several common types. This section discusses the shape and features of the penetrating end of the dildo, not of the entire dildo or how it’s attached.

The “standard”

dildo has a non-tapered or slightly tapered shaft, and often has an enlarged head, similar to a penis. The shaft may be slightly curved, but if it is strongly curved, it is often classified as a g-spot/prostate dildo as well. This type is by far the most popular, both for vaginal and anal use, although some beginners prefer a probe type dildo. Depending on the type of harness the dildo is meant for, it may have molded testicles as part of the base, which many people say gives more pleasure and helps keep the dildo from “bottoming out.” Standard dildos are the most common by a large margin, and are available in virtually any length and width, material, texture, etc.

Vac-u-lock-

Used primarily by Doc Johnson, Vac-u-lock dildos have a rippled hollow in their base, which fits onto a matching plug on the harness or other toy. The advantage of this design is the dildo is firmly attached and can not easily rotate, and does not tend to flop downwards or slip like ring harnesses, as well as there being a wide variety of other devices the dildos can be attached to, such as handles and inflatable balls. The disadvantage is the relatively low availability and high cost of compatible attachments. A number of brands have non-compatible clones of the vac-u-lock system, but dildos and accessories for them are virtually unavailable.

Strapless (Feeldoe)-

A recent design is a strapless strap-on, designed to hold itself in a woman’s vagina with an egg-shaped bulb, and does not require the use of a harness. This differs from a double dildo, in which both ends are symmetrical, as a double dildo can not hold itself in place in one partner while penetrating the other partner. The advantages of this design is that it can be used without any preparation, making using it much more spontaneous, that it provides deep internal thrusting to both partners, and that it can be more comfortable than having to wear a possibly bulky harness. However, it has the disadvantage that it may require strong muscles to use, and it may take practice to be comfortable with one. (I’ve personally found the feeldoe in a two or three strap harness to be the best option for myself) so now we will move onto the attactments in greater depth.

Double dildos-

A double dildo can be used with or without a harness, although most provide no means of using them with a harness. A double dildo, as its name implies, is a dildo in which both ends are designed for insertion, and often is 18 inches (500 mm) or more long. While special ones meant for use with a harness do exist, a normal double dildo is straight, is rarely at a comfortable angle for intercourse, and jabs into the cervix of a woman using one. However, double dildos can be used for a variety of creative positions for which a harness would be awkward, such as both partners in doggy style positions or sitting facing each other.

One-piece latex-

(see pic marked standard). Some harnesses and dildos are made of a single piece of molded latex, with the dildo permanently built into the front. These are often inexpensive, shoddy products, although higher quality ones are available. The advantages are simple use and an appearance some people find erotic, but this is often outweighed by the inability to use a different dildo, the often weak, floppy nature of the dildo, the inability to adjust to a given person for a comfortable fit, and their relatively short lifespan. Straps directly attached to the dildo- Some very cheap “strap-on dildos” have straps or attachments for straps directly molded into the material of the dildo. This design is very flimsy, and is only used on the cheapest of cheap products. They are essentially useless for the traditional purpose of a strap-on dildo (one partner penetrating another using a dildo in a position similar to a penis), but can be strapped around chairs and other objects for a variety of interesting activities.

Still awake yeah I know I’m boring you, but that’s all the hard stuff out of the way. So by now you know what you want in a harness and attachment, so what are you waiting for? The stores await…go on…go shopping.

Well just a little longer and you’ll be ready. Next up we’ll cover Positions while just about any sexual position that can be done with a penis can be done with a strap-on (as well as others), there’s a few in particular that should be mentioned.

Doggy style-

Doggy style is popular, as it’s simple, easy, and allows deep thrusting. The receptive partner kneels down with his (or her face) against the bed (or other surface), and is penetrated from behind. This position works well for both vaginal and anal penetration, and allows deep, smooth strokes, however it sometimes stimulates the prostate less than other positions during pegging.

Missionary-

The missionary position is also popular, and allows both partners to cuddle, see each other, kiss, or perform other activities during intercourse. When used for anal penetration, a pillow or other object (specially made foam cushions are available for this purpose, but their effectiveness over a pillow or two is debatable) placed under the buttocks of the receiver will elevate the anus to a comfortable position and angle.

The uses for a strap-on are limited only by the imagination of the user, and virtually all positions “normal” sex can be had in can also be done with a strap on, plus with thigh, furniture, ride-on ball, and other harnesses, many more that can’t be done normally. Two people can simultaneously penetrate each other, for example, and virtually any other idea that that can be thought of (and obeys the laws of physics) can be done with a strap-on or two.

Don’t forget

When pleasuring your partner anally, you must remember to be very, very gentle. No matter how many times you and your partner may have tried it, you must still be gentle. If it will be the first time you and your partner will try it, then expect it to be very painful when you start. You must take your time, be slow, and gentle. It may be required that your partner may need time for you to just be still so they can adjust to the feeling of your strapon cock inside of their anus. You can’t go in and just start pounding away, especially if you are doing it with someone that has never experienced anal sex (it is not in a porn movie). Also you don’t want to tear anything…

Another reason you must be gentle, and very careful about what you are doing is because it is very easy to tear the skin inside of the anus. And trust me, it doesn’t feel too good to get ripped up in there!

How do I ‘talk’ about harness play.

If you are thinking about bringing up the topic of anal sex with your partner then please remember to be very sensitive, not only about how you bring the topic up, but be sensitive to your partner’s feelings as well. Your partner may have been thinking about bringing the topic up too, but they also may be one of those people who were dreading the question ever being asked. So be sensitive to their feelings. You also must be prepared to be patient. It may take them some time to warm up to the idea, and it certainly will take them time to get use to doing the actual act. You have to work your way up to going faster and deeper, you can’t start off that way. Listen to your partner, let them be your guide. Anal sex should be a pleasurable as possible for both of you.

There are a few positions that make anal entry easier which we will now go over. In the first position, your partner should be on their knees and elbows, bent over. If your partner has something under their chest like a pillow or a blanket they may be more comfortable. Your partner should try to relax as much as possible. If it will help them, try to get them to think about something other than what you are about to do. Once the anus is relaxed, it’s not only much easier for you to penetrate it, but it also hurts less for your partner. In the second positions your partner should lay on their back with their knees up. Once again, a pillow or a blanket may make them feel a little more comfortable. Place the pillow or blanket under their butt this time. The extra height will help you to enter the anus more easily. And in the third position, your partner would lay on their side. Their legs can be either spread apart as if they were taking a step forward, or they could bring their upper leg up to their chest. There are other ways they may positions their legs if they wish. They should do what ever feels comfortable for them.

…The next topic I would like to discuss is anal cleanliness

Of course it goes without saying that your partner’s anus should be cleaned both before and after anal sex, or anal play for that matter. If you happen to be the one to clean your female partner’s anus after you’ve had anal sex then always, always remember to wipe her front to back. This is extremely important because you could give her a yeast infection if you don’t, which would be very unpleasant for her.

Your partner should try to have a bowel movement before you engage in anal sex/anal play. This will reduce the chances that it will turn up during your anal pleasure session. However, it is possible that it still may show up, so be prepared for that. If you’re going to stick it there then you have to expect to deal with that sort of thing at one time or another. Just deal with it as best you can. Chances are your partner would be more embarrassed and or mortified than you would be, so be sensitive to that as well.

Lubrication is the next important issue to discuss.

When practicing anal sex you and your partner should discuss what kind, of lube you plan to use. There are oil based lubricant out there, such as Vaseline, petrolatum, and other oil based lubricants not only make penetration easier, but can also act as an insulator of sorts against any potential “material” that might surface, that you may consider using. However, also consider that latex dildo are damaged by oil based lubricants. Oil based lubricants have also been linked infections, so while acting as an guard to lessen ‘scat’ they may be potentially harmful. There are water based lubricants to consider . When pegging, even more than for other forms of anal sex, proper selection and quantity of lube is extremely important. Many dildos do not “hold” lube as well as a penis would, and a thicker or better adhering lube will likely perform much better with water based lubes being the most popular and readily avail bile. Discuss which type of lubricant you think would be best with your partner. You may even try a few different kinds of lubricant out to see which one you both prefer.

When preparing to have anal sex with your partner you may consider playing around with them a little bit instead of getting right to the actual act. Take some time to build up the mood and get you both excited. Spend some time going down on, or paying attention to their genitals as well don’t completely ignore those!!). You also might want to prepare your partner’s anus for entry by licking it and/or fingering it. Once again, let your partner be your guide. They will tell you what feels good, what doesn’t feel good, how fast or slow to go.

If you’re going to lick their anus, my suggestion would be to start off slow and gentle. Don’t penetrate it right away. Spend some time gliding your tongue around and across the hole. This will loosen up and prepare the anus to open up. Then, gradually, you can start to penetrate the hole with your tongue. Pay attention to your partner’s actions and reactions to see what they like or don’t like on top of getting them to guide you. Or if they don’t guide you at all, this would be a good way to tell what you should and shouldn’t keep doing.

If you plan on fingering your partner then be sure to trim down your nails. Fingernails can and will cut the inside of your partner’s anus, and that can be very painful. , so be careful. Be very careful about how you penetrate the anus with your ‘cock’ too. I say this because if you do it wrong it can be a lot more painful than it would be if it were done correctly. Don’t shove the whole thing in all at once. Slide in a little bit at a time. This is also very important. It should take you a good bit of time to get the whole length of your ‘penis’ inside. The actual amount of time will depend on your partner (remember let your partner be your guide?). Some strap-on dildos come with batteries and vibrate as an added feature to increase the user’s pleasure. Set the vibrating element on “low” to start, and increase the intensity according to your preference.

Once you are completely inside you won’t be moving in and out completely right away either. It’s going to take a lot of patience. But once you have gotten to where your partner says it’s alright for you to move in and out as you please, you should both experience a great deal of pleasure. Pleasure that will be well worth all the time and effort you put in to getting to that point.

The thrusting part will be difficult, specifically, keeping a rhythm going, and that’s for both of us. I think the key is to take your time at first and try different positions. if you have time, try even more positions.. a woman and doesn’t naturally fuck in this way, so watch lots of porn and take notes of what positions the Ladies are in when using a strap-on, They say practice makes perfect.

I know I’ve spoken a lot about pain and the like during this article, but that’s only because the things I’ve discussed should be taken very seriously. If you and your partner take caution and do things properly then this experience should be very enjoyable for both of you. Just remember to communicate, be gentle, take things slow, and be sensitive and everything should work out well.

Wash your strap-on dildo before and after each use.

EDIT

I just received a Email from an emerging Domme I’ve been ‘mentoring’ she has tried her harness for the first time, she has allowed me to post an extract of email here since we both felt it was relevant to the topic at hand ‘The issue of feeling too masculine’

That was a big fear that I had and I know a fear that many other women have as well. Some of us want to remain very girly during the whole ‘donning a penis’ experience. I can say that the concern didn’t even cross my mind. I didn’t feel self-conscious for a moment, but I really think it’s because I spent a lot of time picking out a harness and a dildo that I felt very comfortable with and that I felt looked good on me. Some may feel that my vanity issues during my search were a little extreme ( I know your laughing still Bon,) but I believe that because I was so extreme at that time, I was even surer of myself at the time of play. Besides, I’m a woman, there’s nothing manly about me normally, so adding a strap-on can’t possibly turn me into a man in my b/f’ s mind. Thank you !!

Article by MissBonnie © Collarncuffs.com

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Choosing Your First Anal Sex Toy for Femdom scenes

Do you think of buying your first anal sex toy?

Do not hurry and do not purchase the first anal sex toy you see. First of all you should take into account some things and answer some questions. This will help you to choose an anal sex toy which will suit you best and will make your anal play especially enjoyable.

Such things as personal preferences (some people love smooth penetration, whereas others want to be penetrated with something ribbed), the size, material and your budget are very important. Take all these things into account and we will help you to decide what anal sex toy will suit you best.

What kind of anal stimulation you like?

First of all try to answer this question as one of the most important things which influence your choice is your personal preferences.

Do you want to experience sensation of fullness in the anus?

In this case you should purchase a smooth Butt plug. Butt plugs are similar to dildos, but they do differ from these sex toys. First of all, being designed for anal penetration they are thinner than usual dildos. Secondly, their flared base does not allow the toy to be lost in the rectum. The variety of butt plugs is great, so choose your first butt plug carefully. The only thing we can suggest first timers is to choose a thin butt plug. You can buy a thicker one when you become experienced anal sex lover.

The way you will use your butt plug depends on your preferences. You can wear it during partner sex, masturbation or simply while walking. Anyway, you will get great sexual pleasure.

Do you want to experience more intensive anal stimulation?

Then perhaps you should choose a textured butt plug or an anal stimulator, for instance a shaped plug, which perfectly stimulates prostate. Do you know that vibration inside the anus can be as enjoyable as stimulation of testicles with a vibrator. Anal vibrators are used not only for stimulation. Vibrations relax anal muscles thus allowing you to go further, for instance to begin anal intercourse. So if you feel like stimulating your anus with enjoyable vibrations than choose among great variety of vibrators.

Choose carefully, as anal vibrators do differ. They can vibrate, rotate, pulsate and do many other things. Choose one which will suit you best!

If you want your anal sex toy to enhance your erotic sensations, than you should choose anal beads which look like two or more balls or beads connected with a thread. People use this anal sex toy to insert in the anus and then to pull it out at the moment of orgasm thus making enjoyment much stronger.

Consider the size

Take into account the fact that all anal sex toys are available in a variety of sizes. Perhaps your first anal sex toy should be the slimmest one. Then you can buy a thicker butt plug . Step by step you will realize what size suits you best, but we do recommend you than your first anal sex toy should be as slim as possible. The same concerns anal beads – for the first time choose the smallest ones, after some time you will decide whether you would like something bigger.

Consider material

As you understand anal sex toys are made of various materials. Some of them are flexible, others are more rigid. Some materials are porous, whereas others are nonporous and thus they are easier to clean and to care for. So before buying an anal sex toy find out what material it is made as well as all properties of this material and only after that make the final choice. To learn more about sex toys materials see our toy materials page

Consider your budget

Keep in mind that the material an anal sex toy is made of greatly influences the toy’s price. Most expensive anal sex toys are made of silicone, whereas less expensive ones might be made of jelly or vinyl. As well take into account that vibrating anal sex toys are more expensive than ones which do not vibrate. Take into account all things mentioned above and shop for your first anal sex toy.

Good luck!

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March 13, 2024November 13, 2024

How to Use Anal Beads

Beads for your butt?

It may sound kind of crazy, but these special beads are designed to take advantage of the pleasant sensations that can occur as your sphincter muscles open and close around a series of small round objects. When withdrawn at the peak of orgasm, you may experience an erotic thrill unlike any other. If you’re already discovered the joys of anal play with your Femdom activities you owe it to yourself to give this toy a try, either with self play or with your chosen Femdom partner.

What Are Anal Beads?

Anal beads are basically a series of small round beads spaced evenly along a cord (or sometimes attached to a stalk). Some beads are evenly sized, while others sport spheres that gradually increase as you work your way along the string. ·

Made of simple, jelly rubber, String beads (pic1) are great for first-time anal adventurers, as they’re relatively inexpensive and have a nice texture. (Note that since this material can’t be 100% disinfected by boiling like silicone can, we don’t recommend sharing this toy).
Sturdy silicone beads like Flexi beads (pic2)or classic silicone Anal beads
(pic3) can be cleaned easier are hygienic, extremely comfortable, and easy to clean. On top of that they warm to the body quickly and can take on the vibration of a toy that’s held to its base.
Beaded dildos like the Ripple (pic4) operate on the same principle as the beads, but are set along a firmer stalk or dildo.

How Do They Work?

Beads are like any other kind of butt plug with an added bonus: as each bead is inserted, the sphincter muscles contract and relax around each one for extra sensation. Some folks love the feeling of having them pulled out all at once during the moment of orgasm

How Do I Use Them?

Remember the anal mantra when it comes to butt play: “communication, lubrication, and relaxation.” that’s MissBonnies Mantra! If you’re new to anal play, you might want to learn more in our beginner’s guide to butt sex.

1.Communication counts! Whether you’re using anal beads alone or with a Femdom partner you want to stay focused on what your body or your Femdom partner is telling you. Playing together? Check in with your submissive with simple questions: Do you need more lube? Would it feel better to add more stimulation on other body parts? Are you ready for another bead? Is it time to pull them out?
2.Get a lube job. Since the butt doesn’t self-lubricate, it’s important to apply lots of lubricant (try a nice thick water-based lube), to your beads, and be prepared to add more as action progresses.
3.Make sure you’re turned on. Read your favorite eroticia or watch some Femdom DVD’s. Listen to your partner talk dirty, but get yourself in the mood. Some people like to have an orgasm before heading for the back door to ensure their whole body is relaxed and blood is really pumping through the genitals, which can make the anus more sensitive.
4.Gently caress the anus. Tap lightly or massage the anal area in preparation.
5.Go slow. Take your time and insert the first bead. Stop for a moment and let your body adjust to the sensation. Insert the beads slooowly, allowing yourself to really savor the sensation. Stop to add extra lube when you need to. There’s no hurry to insert the entire set of beads to the hilt. The toy can feel just as nice when used partway, or just the first couple of beads.
6.Take a breather. Even if you’re reeling from the pleasure of the beads, don’t hold your breath. It’s a common practice for folks to take shallow breaths-or forget to breathe completely-during sex, but deep breathing is essential to enjoying sex, especially of the anal persuasion. Breathing deeply draws much-needed oxygen through your body, which helps to relax your muscles even further.
7.Add to your pleasure. Try adding other kinds of stimulation at the same time. vibrators make it easy to send a good buzz to nipples, penis, testicles or perineum while you’re working on the butt.
8.Go for timing. With the beads inside you and your orgasm building, try to time their withdrawal with your climax.
9.Gently now. Pull the beads straight out, rather than tilting them up or down. Resist the urge to yank them out as if you were starting a lawnmower, but respect your body and gently pull them out.
With a little bit of practice, anal beads can become your new favorite toy box addition!

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March 11, 2024October 27, 2024

Prostrate Milking

Reposted from ReginaMirus blog cira 2008
Per special request, for Mistress Cruella. I promised I’d do this, now I’m delivering!
I don’t profess to be the guru of p-spot stimulation, but I’d like to think that I’ve been pretty successful with it, so here’s what it is that I do.

Key elements of a successful prostate massage:

1.He absolutely MUST BE relaxed. If he’s wired, anxious about anything (like performance), or he’s just fearful it’s gonna hurt, then it’s just not going to work.

2.If he’s completely brand new to anal, it’s usually a good idea to let him work on getting the anus open with a smallish butt plug and plenty of lube, on his own time. That way, he can feel the trajectory, know what it feels like when it slides in, etc. And working on his own, at his own pace, he’ll have the confidence when the time comes that he can endure that little bit of pain it takes to open him up (if there is any, at all). Better yet, have him practice wearing it, and have it in when you’re ready to start.

3.I’d also highly recommend before any anal play to administer an enema, or have him do one himself and evacuate prior to the session. There’s nothing worse then sticking a finger or two in there and coming back with a “door prize” . For this, I like to use a “dry” enema, by inserting about 4 tbsp of lube in the anus, wait about 20 min or until the urge hits him, then let him evacuate. All clean, no fuss, no muss, and no nasty surprises .

The best position for him for p-spot massage I think is on all fours, ass up, shoulders down. I may also give him a pillow or two to tuck in under his tummy, so he feels a little more comfortable.

I like to talk to him throughout the entire process, but especially while I’m first poking and prodding around down there. I usually tell him what I’m going to do, and then start introducing my finger in the area. Lube at this point is an absolute MUST, and the more lube, the better. I read somewhere that with all anal play, just when you get to the point that you think you’re using too much lube, that’s the point where you ALMOST have enough .

Gently slide past the outer ring, and feel for the inner ring, which is the sensitive part that usually makes them uncomfortable. If he gets to that point, let him know you’re backing out, slowly back out, then try again, or just stop moving until he gathers his bearings and feels ok again (and he will). Once you are past the inner ring, you’re going to feel downwards for a small little organ about the diameter of a walnut. If you have him on all fours, it’s going to be directly past the inner ring and straight down. It’s sits directly on the other side of the anal cavity, but you can definitely feel the edges of this delightful little organ through the anal wall.

And this is the funny part. Once you start applying pressure, he’s going to feel the overwhelming urge to pee. And it happens every time, like clockwork. That’s because you’re applying direct pressure on the prostate, which presses into the bladder. I let them make the attempt to pee, but it’s usually pretty fruitless .

At this point, it’s best to take your time and literally feel out your man and that amazing little internal button of his. Some guys like a circular motion all around the perimeter, some like pressure more on one side than the other, some like firm pressure right in the middle. It usually takes a little more time (I’ve found it usually takes about 10 min or so), but eventually he’s going to get AMAZINGLY turn on, and that wonderful clear fluid will start to drip, then eventually start running like a faucet. The key here is his reaction. Find that magical little spot that drives him wild and work the living fuck out of it. Keep checking his cock, comment on his “flow” from time to time (and how much of a mess he’s making of himself!). The important key here is take your time. You can manipulate him to cum at this point without touching his penis, or you can jerk him off with the other hand to give him a fairly overwhelming orgasm with ejaculation. Or play a delightful little game of tease and denial by edging and tormenting him for as long as you desire. Either way, I can assure you that a good time will definitely be had by all .

MissBonnie Comment:
Quote:
I don’t profess to be the guru of p-spot stimulation
I don’t know, this reads pretty ‘spot’ on to me Thanks again for sharing.

for the dry enema for any one wanting to try it …I use a medical syringe (no needle of course ) less messy I can draw it straight from the bottle of lube. I use about two tablespoons which is 10 cc’s on the syringe measure so Regina’s way would be 20 cc’s (so you may need to load the syringe twice as most go to 10cc). ‘The ‘movement’ will be produced in a compact body, rather than in the more copious liquid form produced by a wet enema; and since no water is used, none will be retained higher up in the colon, to be expelled at a later, and possibly inconvenient, time I’m with Regina “door prize” not good.

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March 11, 2024November 15, 2024

Prostrate spot milking

Carefully insert your finger or fingers into his anus. (wear gloves and use lube make sure he’s relaxed) Move them gradually up wards and to the back, along the area of the rectum towards the front of his body. Your fingers should be moving in roughly the direction of his navel.

oh helps too if he’s ‘sort of’ comfortable and it’s warm, the warm makes their balls drop

You will feel the prostate gland, which is like a small, round bulb about the size of a large walnut. Gently massage it with a light waving motion along its sides, taking care not to press hard on the central area, where the sensitive nerves are located. Avoid touching the prostate gland with your fingernails.

he may experience a sensation that makes him feel like going to the bathroom although he does not have to. Try not to let it affect him, and continue with the massage. Talk to him, distract him or get him to talk to you. (just till you know what your doing.. first few times)

After a few minutes, the prostate gland may be stimulated enough for ejaculation to occur. However, does not always successfully bring about ejaculation. it takes practice and time.

what I do is just masturbate him a little to get him ready for the milk, calms them down, also gets the fluids built back up…then i do the ‘massage’

I found when I first started they didn’t always flow first go, and found a little trick to help is tell them, “right I’m going to prostrate train you, if your a good boy I might Milk you. can’t have MY balls turning blue, now can we” Then if it doesn’t work you don’t look like your an idiot and don’t know what your doing…LOL or if it does work hey presto aren’t you clever. (and don’t I have a clever subbie)

I found the guys freak out a little if they have never had it done, so by saying ‘you might milk them’ they get horny and become a more compliant and they relax and make it easier work for us, it puts them in a subbie mind space. you shouldn’t have, to have him hard, if he is it’s ok. most subbies are so turned on by the idea of milking they end up with raging hard on’s and only take a few minutes to milk.

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March 11, 2024November 15, 2024

Anal Play

A Beginner’s Guide to the basics

Whether you’re trying to convince someone to have anal sex or trying to figure out how to do it in a gentle, pain free manner, there’s no better preparation that exploring anal play with yourself.

Just remember MissBonnie and MissBitchs Anal mantra when it comes to anal play:

“Communication, lubrication, and relaxation.”

Femdom Anal play

General overview and safety

For various reasons anal play or sex – yes, there is a difference -appeals to many people who are into the many forms of erotic power exchange, and Femdom/ BDSM. Although personal motivations may vary, the need for the submissive to actively cooperate as well as the fact that many people have a mental barrier here are the most common factors for this subject’s popularity. Anal play is certainly not without risks, so you should be very aware of what you are doing. When you understand and know how to minimize them, the risks are minimal.

The first thing to be aware of every time you enter into it is that anal contact is HIV-risk number 1. If you are playing with a partner you do not know, just met, or are having a one night stand with – and possibly most important – if you have a bisexual partner – take all precautions necessary. Maybe you have heard this before but the time required for HIV to be discovered varies from person to person and can be as long as seven years. In other words, having known each other for three months is no guarantee for protection…so protect yourself.

There are five different forms of anal play and the differences as well as the effects can to a large extent be compared to vaginal play:

penis/anus contact
finger- and/or fist play
using toys
rimming
enemas

Don’t worry, we’ll get to the differences. First. Let’s try to clarify some other – more general – aspects.

Shame

Anal play is nothing to be ashamed of, although many, many people are. We started it in our earliest childhood. In fact it is generally acknowledged as the first sexually related exploration every baby does and even some fetuses do it prior to birth. Let’s face it, the odor of plain shit – but called “musk” – is used in almost every perfume and even more so in male cosmetics because it is generally known as sexually appealing. For you animal lovers out there: the scent is derived from the musk plant, not the deer. Any biologist will explain that in all mammals, the genitals and the anus were deliberately placed close together, simply because the smell of the one points the way to the other. So, if you like it, or feel attracted to it, there is absolutely nothing wrong with it.

Plus, the anus is an erogenous zone by itself, whether you like it or not. Stimulating it will cause sexual arousal and feeling somebody “touching your vagina from the outside” (which is one of the effects) is an amazing sensation for a woman.

Kinsey – the sexologist best know for his extensive research of the sexual behavior of both men and women – said it as follows: “The contractions of the buttocks reflect, more than any one factor, the development of the tensions involved in erotic arousal.” The buttock muscles are among the strongest in the human body and they come into play during almost any form of sexual intercourse and even masturbation – especially for women. Some women even masturbate just by contracting and relaxing muscles and these include the “back door”. In the event you thought anal sexual attraction is just for a few, Kinsey – in his extensive research – found that fifty (!) percent of both men and women had had some experience with anal stimulation or anal intercourse. More recent research in the USA shows that some ten percent of the heterosexual couples regularly have anal intercourse.

The anal and vaginal region and the penis share the same nerve roots and this is the physiological explanation for the sexual attraction of the anus. And – coming back to erotic power exchange – anal play and intercourse to many has strong connotations with terms of dominance and submission.

Forms of play

Penis/anal penetration – For the man the main advantage of penetrating the anus with his penis is that the anus is not only very narrow, but also the circular muscle round it is much stronger. As a result he will feel much more sensation, compared to penetrating the relatively soft and receptive vagina. The vaginal contractions he feels only during the female orgasm is what he feels constantly while penetrating the anus. To the majority of those being analy penetrated the attraction is in two things: one being the “giving” of this to their partner and of course the stimulation itself.

Finger play and fisting – Stimulating the anus with fingers, although desirable all by itself, causes very relaxing feelings when done carefully, and is mainly foreplay to something else: either anal intercourse or anal fisting. If anal play is new to someone, they may have trouble relaxing the anal sphincter muscle. To break through this mostly mental block, they may require gentle massage and training to open up. (For information on fisting use the link provided later).

Toys

Toys are mainly used as devices to train the anus for further play. To avoid all sorts of unwanted mishaps, please only use specially designed toys (like butt plugs) for this purpose and not, for example vibrators. Apart from this, vibrators and dildos are usually too stiff for the anus. Toys for anal play should be very flexible, made from latex or silicone (which is a different type of silicone than used for plastic breast surgery). Rimming – Rimming is stimulating the anus with your tongue. The technique can be compared to oral stimulation of the vagina. Enemas – An enema is technique where (usually) fluid is brought into the bowels to force them to expell their content. This may be used for various purposes – cleaning before fisting, as a punishment, humiliation, training and sexual arousal, all of course depending on your own preferences.

General precautions

The use of latex gloves when using your hands is a must, to protect yourself, to protect your partners, their insides and for hygienic reasons. Never move your hands, fingers, penis or toys from the anus to the vagina without thoroughly washing them first!

Cover your penis and toys with condoms at all times, to protect yourself, your partners and your toys.

When penetrating a partner you do not know well, use a double or even a triple condom and do buy condoms designed for anal play (GaySafe for example).

Item number two in any form of anal play is lubricant. Lots of it. Don’t be shy about using lube! Be as generous as you can and add repeatedly, especially during finger play and fisting. Always use water based lubricant only. Oil based lubricants, as well as butter (don’t laugh, this is still frequently used) will ruin latex and render your protection useless.

Rimming without dental dams is outright unsafe unless you have been married or lived together for a long time and have had sex only with each other.

Before finger play or fisting – even when wearing gloves – file your nails to avoid damaging tissue. Run the pad of your thumb around each nail, if can feel your nails at all the odds are you’ll cut your partner…or your glove. File them again.

Wash thoroughly before and after. Some people prefer the use of enemas before anal play to clean out the area. The best way to do this is the old-fashioned way. Use an enema bag and fill it with about a mug full of lukewarm water or milk, or buy a Fleets enema kit at the store (USA -brand names in Europe may vary). Never ever buy an enema kit from a sex boutique. No matter what they tell you – use the correct and safe equipment or none at all!

Health risks

1. Additionally, the following things are best NOT done:
2. Anal play during illness of any kind. using objects or toys that were not specifically designed for anal use.
3. applying force of any kind (the anus will swallow your finger, even fist, or toys, all by itself).
4. Anal sex should be avoided if one has hemorrhoids, infections or small wounds around the anal area for various reasons. One is the HIV risk, another is that your movements around the area may spread bacteria from the inside to the outside and last but not least, it usually hurts too much.
5. Except for the HIV-risk, ejaculating inside is not a problem at all.

The inside story

The intestines are anything but straight. The rectum (the part just before the anal opening) ends in a sharp, ninety degree upward curve. (For some of you this is why you cannot get all of your penis in). If you attempt to push past this turn, you will only cause tremendous pain, for both yourself and for your partner.

When penetrating with your fingers or fist remember this turn is the second hurdle you have to take, which requires just as much attention, ease and patience as the anus itself. The upward turn has a second ring of muscle around it (which is what holds the feces inside) and this one needs to be relaxed as well. Also, remember that whereas the vagina is literally a dead end, the intestines are not and this is the main reason to use only toys designed for this kind of play. They are designed in such a way that they cannot accidentally slip inside and disappear. Should this happen anyway, please do not hesitate to visit your doctor or the nearest emergency room. It may come out by itself, but there is no certainty here. Yes, if it happens it is embarrassing, but do remember that doctors and nurses have seen it all before and are only there to help you (which is what they will do) not to judge you.

The inside of the intestines has very delicate lining that is damaged easily, a good reason to wear gloves at all times. Fingernails can do a lot of damage but so can rough or unexpected movements

Getting in and out

Femdom anal play take time. Getting in takes time, especially the first times. Take all the time in the world, the strap on will be around…it’s been around for hundreds of years, a few more days or weeks will not harm you…rushing may!!!. If you fail the first time, that is not a problem. In fact it is normal. Simply try again later or another time. Go slow and be careful. The anus, when massaged carefully, gently and long enough, will open up itself and is usually capable of doing very unexpected things. The trick is to relax, so be sure to put your partner into a comfortable position. Do it step by step. Get one finger in first, then slowly and gently add the next one and maybe after a while another one. If you want to penetrate with your “penis”, now is the time to do so.

Getting out is done in the same careful way. Go slow, even if the anus tries to push you out. There is a very good chance your partner will need to visit the bathroom immediately after a session. If they don’t, ask them gently and even accompany or encourage them to do so. Even if they don’t “have to,” being open about it will at least take the tension away and help them relax.

After care and support

Most people, especially when inexperienced in this area, will need lots and lots of support, love, care, tenderness, before, during and after a session. Some may require aftercare Remember that most people need to break through a huge mental barrier and that barrier will not be gone after the first time. It takes quite a while to get over the feeling of shame. Communication is paramount here.

Another very practical thing to remember – but it makes a great form of after care as well – is that anal play to many people will stimulate the digestive process. In other words, your partner may very well be hungry afterwards. Think ahead and make sure you have a bite to eat readily available (which is good advice after most scenes, as the stress and fatigue of a session will make you and your partners hungry). Sweets, i.e. sugar, will help regain some energy quickly and be sure to offer something to drink as well. Both the emotions and stress have a draining and dehydrating effect.

If you let your partners drink an isotonic drink first (like Gatorade) they will quickly regain their energy. This will also help prevent another thing. If you are planning to have an alcoholic drink later, remember that after a scene a body will absorb any liquid like a sponge and if it is has alcohol will get them very drunk. The isotonic drink will prevent this from happening.

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Table of Contents

What is a Butt Plug?

Benefits of Using a Butt Plug

Safety Measures for Using a Butt Plug

Using Butt Plugs in Femdom Scenes

Choosing the Right Butt Plug for Male Submissives

The Importance of Lube in Anal Play

Size Considerations: Does Size Matter?

Preparation

What Position should the submissive be in

Safety matters with a Butt Plug

Can you sleep with a butt plug?

How can I make using a butt plug more comfortable?

Common Misconceptions About Butt Plugs

Aftercare: Caring for Yourself and Your Plug

Anal play Scene Ideas

Control at dinner

Milk him in chastity

If hes cucked get someone else to control the remote

Hot and Cold

Table of Contents

Introduction: The Journey into Anal Discovery

Why Use a Butt Plug?

Choosing the Right Butt Plug

Preparation: Setting the Stage for Comfort and Consent

How to Insert and Use a Butt Plug

Enjoying the Experience: Activities and Stimulation

Removing the Butt Plug and Post-Care

Conclusion: Embracing Anal Exploration

What the hell is a harness? What type is the best for Femdom and pegging? So your partner has said he wants you to use a harness on him? Why does he want this? But I don’t know what to do ? Or where to start ?How do I use it?

Table of Contents

Calm. Lets start at the beginning

Ok you have your willing partner, so our first step, is going to be, what harness your going to need ?

2-strap harness

3-strap harnesses

Other Harness types

materials

Leather

Cloth

Latex, rubber, and PVC

Synthetics (Nylon, synthetic leather, foam)

OK still with us ?

The “standard”

Vac-u-lock-

Strapless (Feeldoe)-

Double dildos-

One-piece latex-

Still awake yeah I know I’m boring you, but that’s all the hard stuff out of the way. So by now you know what you want in a harness and attachment, so what are you waiting for? The stores await…go on…go shopping.

Doggy style-

Missionary-

Don’t forget

How do I ‘talk’ about harness play.

…The next topic I would like to discuss is anal cleanliness

Lubrication is the next important issue to discuss.

Wash your strap-on dildo before and after each use.

EDIT

Table of Contents

Do you think of buying your first anal sex toy?

What kind of anal stimulation you like?

Do you want to experience sensation of fullness in the anus?

Do you want to experience more intensive anal stimulation?

Consider the size

Consider material

Consider your budget

Good luck!

Table of Contents

Beads for your butt?

What Are Anal Beads?

How Do They Work?

How Do I Use Them?

Key elements of a successful prostate massage:

A Beginner’s Guide to the basics

Femdom Anal play

Table of Contents

General overview and safety

Shame

Forms of play

Toys

General precautions

Health risks